| [00:17.13] |
Me, I'm the Lonesome Kicker |
| [00:24.33] |
Extra points, field goals at your service |
| [00:31.76] |
One might think it comes with glory |
| [00:38.94] |
You might think different after you listen to my story |
| [00:47.04] |
My helmet is equipped with a tiny face mask |
| [00:54.16] |
What it possibly could protect, I do not know |
| [01:01.96] |
The other guys on the team |
| [01:03.83] |
Like to make fun of my little shoulder pads |
| [01:09.63] |
And also like to hide the special shoe |
| [01:12.57] |
I need to kick in the snow |
| [01:17.49] |
People think it's so easy |
| [01:19.93] |
To kick a field goal from the 30 yard line |
| [01:24.74] |
They forget to add seven yards for the snap |
| [01:27.67] |
And 10 more 'cause the goal posts are pushed way back |
| [01:32.22] |
In 1974, the uprights were right on the goal line |
| [01:36.28] |
But some of the players were running into them |
| [01:37.77] |
And getting hurt |
| [01:39.46] |
So screw the kicker |
| [01:42.45] |
Who cares about the kicker? |
| [01:47.07] |
But I kick that ball |
| [01:48.82] |
And I pray it goes straight |
| [01:50.94] |
If it does |
| [01:52.19] |
The coach says "Good job, number 8" |
| [01:54.81] |
He doesn't even know my name is |
| [01:56.88] |
Andre Kristacovitchlalinski, Jr. |
| [02:01.93] |
But that's the life I live |
| [02:05.24] |
The Lonesome Kicker |
| [02:14.67] |
Kickoffs can be so very scary |
| [02:21.54] |
Especially, if the returner breaks on through |
| [02:29.09] |
And I'm the only guy on the playing field left to tackle him |
| [02:36.58] |
I don't want to get hurt |
| [02:38.51] |
So I pretend to tie my shoe |
| [02:44.52] |
Once again, I'm ignored by my teammates and all my coaches |
| [02:51.76] |
"Go back where you came from!" |
| [02:53.76] |
Scream 70,000 fans |
| [02:58.87] |
Well, I know I could win their love back |
| [03:02.05] |
By catching a winning touch-down |
| [03:06.74] |
But, unfortunately, I was born with these very small hands |
| [03:14.00] |
And I hope that the cameras don't come in too close |
| [03:17.81] |
'Cause they might see the tears in my eyes |
| [03:21.74] |
As I sit on this bench made of cold-hearted wood |
| [03:25.61] |
And the splinters go deep in my thighs |
| [03:28.98] |
And the towel boy snickers as he walks by |
| [03:32.35] |
The Lonesome Kicker |
| [03:38.77] |
Another blocked kick |
| [03:42.58] |
And everybody blames me |
| [03:46.19] |
But it was the Left Guard |
| [03:48.19] |
Who didn't pick up his man |
| [03:51.25] |
Oh, why can't they see... |
| [04:07.67] |
In my home country |
| [04:09.85] |
I could have been a minor league soccer player |
| [04:14.97] |
But I came to America |
| [04:17.02] |
Seeking fortune and seeking fame |
| [04:22.52] |
I didn't realize that if I shanked one |
| [04:25.76] |
And blew the point spread |
| [04:29.88] |
Some drunk guys would push me into their hibachi |
| [04:33.31] |
After the game |
| [04:37.00] |
So I go home at night |
| [04:39.12] |
'Cause I never get invited |
| [04:40.11] |
To go drinking with the other guys |
| [04:44.67] |
And I sit in my chair, and I soak my foot |
| [04:48.10] |
As I eat a plate of cold french fries |
| [04:51.91] |
And my wife's out with her quote-unquote friend |
| [04:56.03] |
And my son can't look me in the eyes |
| [04:59.27] |
But that's the life I live |
| [05:02.64] |
The Lonesome Kicker |
| [05:10.58] |
Kicking for you |
| [05:17.75] |
They took my snow shoe |
| [05:25.87] |
They're going for two |
