| [02:34.-4] | If Joey and I play with matches, we could get you up to an even 100. 要是乔伊和我玩火柴 就可以让你累积到一百 |
| [05:08.-2] | Oh,my God! 天哪 |
| [06:27.-4] | ...if you know what I mean. 懂我的意思吧？ |
| [06:43.-3] | Why don't you break up with one of them? 何不跟其中一个分手？ |
| [08:16.-3] | See? You just need the right command. 看到了吗？下对指令就行了 |
| [08:48.-3] | Joey,put that down. 乔伊，放下 |
| [10:57.-4] | We don't know if he'll propose. 也不知道他会不会求婚 |
| [12:34.-1] | Good deal. 很好 |
| [18:05.-4] | And I feel like I've conquered the intellectual world. 我已经征服了知识界 |
| [18:09.-1] | And now I have the most beautiful woman in the world. 现在又拥有世界上最美的女人 |
| [18:34.-2] | ...the Ultimate Fighting Champion. 终极格斗冠军 |
| [00:03.20] | Wouldn't it be cool if our duck and our chick had a baby? 要是我们的鸡鸭生小宝宝 不是很酷？ |
| [00:06.53] | We could call it Chuck. 可以叫它查克 |
| [00:10.31] | Or Dick. 或狄克 |
| [00:15.68] | Listen,I need a favor. 我要请你们帮忙 |
| [00:19.15] | I was in the shower, and as I was... 我刚才洗澡，正在… |
| [00:21.82] | ...cleansing myself,I felt something. 洗身体时，发现一件事 |
| [00:25.65] | Was it like a sneeze,only better? 很像打喷嚏，但是感觉更爽？ |
| [00:30.76] | No. I mean,like, a thing on my body. 不是，是我身上长了东西 |
| [00:33.73] | Well,what was it? 什么东西？ |
| [00:35.16] | Well,I don't know. It's kind of in a place that's not.... 不晓得，它长在我不能… |
| [00:39.03] | It's not visually accessible to me. And I was hoping maybe you guys... 我看不到，我想麻烦你们 |
| [00:43.34] | ...could help me out. 帮我看一下 |
| [00:47.38] | Come on,you guys! It's no big deal! 拜托，又没什么 |
| [00:53.85] | Well,what is it? Is it a mole? 是什么？是痣吗？ |
| [00:58.29] | No,it's too wrinkly to be a mole. 不是，太皱了，不是痣 |
| [01:01.22] | Is it? What,a pimple? 那是痘子吗？ |
| [01:06.46] | No,it's... 不是，它… |
| [01:08.23] | ...fancier than a pimple. 比青春痘高级 |
| [01:10.43] | -Ross,just go see a doc -Guys,what's? 你就去看医… 你们在干… |
| [01:18.37] | Well,it's definite. Two more weeks of winter. 确定了，冬天还有两星期 |
| [01:21.48] | Yeah,right. 没错 |
| [01:23.58] | The One With Ross' Thing 本集播出：“寡人有疾” |
| [02:14.66] | And this is the coffeehouse. This is where I play my music. 这是咖啡馆，我都在这里表演 |
| [02:18.53] | -Good deal. -These are my friends. 漂亮 他们是我的朋友 |
| [02:20.84] | People? This is Vince. Vince,the people. 各位，这是文斯 文斯，我的朋友 |
| [02:25.91] | Vince is a fireman. 文斯是消防员 |
| [02:28.64] | Have you ever rescued anyone from a burning building? 你从燃烧的大楼里救过人吗？ |
| [02:31.38] | Ninety-eight hot saves. Highest on the force. 九十八次，队上第一高 |
| [02:40.05] | Fire safety is not a joke,son. 孩子，不能拿火灾开玩笑 |
| [02:44.79] | You're right. I know. 你说得对，我知道 |
| [02:47.63] | Look,I gotta go. I'm on call tonight. 我要走了，晚上要值班 |
| [02:50.06] | See you Saturday. 星期六见 |
| [02:54.57] | He's cute,Pheebs. 菲比，他好可爱 |
| [02:56.00] | But you just started dating that teacher. 但你不是刚和那个老师交往？ |
| [02:58.27] | Oh,Jason? 杰森？ |
| [02:59.47] | We're seeing each other tonight. 我们晚上要见面 |
| [03:01.58] | Well,Pheebs? 菲比？ |
| [03:03.58] | Two dates in one day? That's so unlike you. 脚踏两条船？你不像这种人 |
| [03:06.41] | I know,I know. I'm,like,playing the field. 我也知道 我在游戏人间 |
| [03:09.85] | I'm juggling two guys. I'm sowing my wild oats. 我在玩弄别人，搞七捻三 |
| [03:14.19] | You know,this kind of,like, oat-sowing,field-playing juggler. 我是搞七捻三的花心萝蔔 |
| [03:18.66] | So do they know about each other? 他们知道对方的存在吗？ |
| [03:21.10] | Does a dog's lips move when he reads? 狗狗念书时，嘴唇会动吗？ |
| [03:27.80] | Okay,no,they don't know. 他们不知道 |
| [03:31.87] | Hey,guys. 各位 |
| [03:36.34] | -Well? -How'd it go at the doctor's? 怎么样？ 医生怎么说？ |
| [03:38.55] | He said there's definitely nothing to worry about. It's benign. 他说不用担心，是良性的 |
| [03:42.68] | -What is it? -He couldn't even tell me. 是什么？ 他根本说不出来 |
| [03:45.12] | He said it was just some sort of "skin abnormality." 他只说是一种皮肤异常 |
| [03:51.06] | The worse thing is,he said, being unable to identify it... 更糟的是他说，由于无法辨认 |
| [03:54.70] | ... he was reluctant to remove it. 他不愿意为我切除 |
| [03:56.83] | You should go to my guy. 你应该去找我的医生 |
| [03:58.47] | Because when I went in there with my third nipple... 我去找他时 |
| [04:02.14] | ...he just lopped it right off. 他直接就把它给切了 |
| [04:04.54] | So I guess I'm lucky. 我蛮幸运的 |
| [04:06.54] | I mean,not as lucky as people who are born with two nipples. 虽然比不上天生两个的人 |
| [04:11.31] | At least they knew what yours was. You know? Yours had a name. 至少他们知道你长了什么 你的有名字 |
| [04:16.18] | Maybe they'll name yours after you. 也许医学界会以你为名 |
| [04:19.32] | You know? They'd call it "The Ross." 把它叫做“罗斯” |
| [04:22.09] | And then people would be,like, "Oh,he's got a Ross." 大家会说 咳，他长了一个罗斯 |
| [04:27.43] | Yeah,that'd be cool. 是啊，真酷 |
| [04:31.33] | Pete's breaking up with me. 彼特要跟我分手 |
| [04:33.23] | What? 什么？ |
| [04:34.90] | I just checked my messages. 我刚才听留言 |
| [04:36.77] | He said that when he gets back, "We need to talk." 他说等他回来 “我们得谈一谈” |
| [04:40.51] | -And? -Well,that's it. 然后呢？ 就这样 |
| [04:42.21] | People never say,"We need to talk," unless it's something bad. 没有人会说“我们得谈一谈” 除非是坏事 |
| [04:45.85] | That doesn't necessarily mean he's breaking up with you. 那不一定代表他要跟你分手 |
| [04:49.28] | Really? 真的？ |
| [04:50.35] | Maybe he just cheated on you. 也许他只是对你不忠 |
| [04:57.76] | I won't get rich doing it, but I gotta say,it's cool... 这么做没有好处 但我还是很高兴 |
| [05:01.46] | ... knowing you're making a difference in a kid's life. 我改变了一个孩子 |
| [05:04.57] | That is so great. 真好 |
| [05:09.77] | Oh,my God! 天哪 |
| [05:11.31] | We'd better call the fire department. 赶快通知消防队 |
| [05:14.38] | Well,we don't need a fireman. 不必找消防员吧 |
| [05:16.64] | We need,like,a good mechanic. 应该找好的黑手来 |
| [05:20.82] | Here they come! We gotta get out of here! 他们来了，快逃 |
| [05:23.82] | Wait. Why? 等一下，为什么？ |
| [05:24.92] | If I wanted to see a fireman, I'd date one. 要是我想看消防员 我会找消防员约会 |
| [05:30.33] | That's all it is. A third nipple. 只是一个多出来的 |
| [05:32.49] | You know? Just your run-of-the-mill third nipple. 很普通的第三个 |
| [05:36.26] | You can take it off. Just slice that baby right off. 你可以把它切掉，直接切掉 |
| [05:40.00] | Take your shirt off. Let's see what we're dealing with. 把上衣脱掉让我看一下 |
| [05:45.84] | What are you doing? 你在干什么？ |
| [05:48.34] | Just showing you my run-of-the-mill, slice-it-right-off third nipple. 让你看那个非常普通 可以直接切掉的 |
| [05:53.08] | Well,that's not a third nipple. 这不是第三个 |
| [05:55.85] | First of all,it's on your ass |
| [05:59.29] | Well,then what is it? 不然是什么？ |
| [06:01.29] | Wait a minute. Hold it. 等一下 |
| [06:05.33] | -Jansen,come in here. -I'm with Hamilton! 詹森，来一下 我在跟汉弥顿讲话 |
| [06:08.36] | He's good with weird things. Bring him in too. 他对怪东西很在行，叫他也来 |
| [06:13.53] | I gotta go water Pete's plants. 我得去帮彼特浇花 |
| [06:15.80] | You know what? If he's gonna break up with me,maybe I won't water them. 你们知道吗？ 如果他想分手，我就不浇了 |
| [06:20.21] | If he's gonna break up with you, maybe Joey and I should do it... 如果他要分手 干脆让乔伊和我去“浇” |
| [06:29.52] | Or... 或者… |
| [06:31.29] | ...we could go and pee on them. 我们可以去对着花盆撒尿 |
| [06:36.29] | I can't take it,you know. 我受不了了 |
| [06:38.23] | I'm afraid one of them will catch me with the other. 我好怕会被捉到 |
| [06:41.30] | It's making me crazy! 我快疯了 |
| [06:46.47] | What happened to playing the field? 你不是在游戏人间？ |
| [06:50.00] | It doesn't feel like playing anymore. 现在不像游戏了 |
| [06:52.37] | It's feels like work. It's like I'm working in the field. 比较像工作 我好像在做田野调查 |
| [06:56.48] | So pick one of them. 那就选一个 |
| [06:58.18] | Which one do you like more? 你比较喜欢哪一个？ |
| [06:59.51] | Vince is great,you know? Because he's,like,a "guy" guy. 文斯很棒，他是男人中的男人 |
| [07:04.19] | He's just so burly, so very burly. 他好壮，真的好壮 |
| [07:09.86] | Okay,good. So there you go. Go with Vince. 好，那就选文斯吧 |
| [07:13.06] | But Jason's really sensitive. 但是杰森好感性 |
| [07:14.90] | Sensitive is important. Pick him. 感性很重要，选他 |
| [07:18.33] | Oh,sure. Go with the sissy. 是啊，听娘娘腔的话 |
| [07:22.37] | Jason is not a sissy. 杰森才不娘娘腔 |
| [07:25.17] | I meant Chandler. 我是说钱德 |
| [07:37.75] | You know,I have dinner plans. 我晚上有约 |
| [07:41.72] | Thank you so much for coming on such a short notice. 谢谢各位临时赶来 |
| [07:45.53] | Ladies and gentlemen,I've been practicing medicine for 23 years... 各位先生、女士 我行医23年 |
| [07:50.73] | ...and I'm stumped. 现在却被难倒了 |
| [08:04.51] | Okay,this is the den. 这里是书房 |
| [08:06.08] | All right,check this out. Lights! 你们看喔…灯光 |
| [08:09.28] | All right,less lights! Bad lights! 少一点光…不好的光 |
| [08:12.39] | Lights,go away! 灯光走开 |
| [08:19.09] | And the dimmer switch. 也可以用调的 |
| [08:22.46] | For a rich guy,that's a small TV. 他那么有钱，电视还真小 |
| [08:24.83] | That's the video phone. 那是视讯电话 |
| [08:26.63] | But you shouldn't be here. So don't touch anything. 你们不能来的，所以不要乱碰 |
| [08:30.61] | IKEA,this is comfortable! 宜家傢俱，好舒服 |
| [08:34.84] | This place is amazing! 这里太高级了 |
| [08:37.25] | -Oh,God! That's the nicest kitchen. -I know. 那个厨房好棒 我知道 |
| [08:40.18] | It's the nicest kitchen. 我是褚的 |
| [08:41.68] | The refrigerator told me to have a great day. 冰箱还会祝我今天愉快 |
| [08:45.82] | Look,a millionaire's checkbook. 你们看，百万富翁的支票簿 |
| [08:51.03] | Oh,my God,that's Pete. Get out! 天哪，是彼特，快出去！ |
| [08:53.29] | How the hell do you answer a video phone? 视讯电话要怎么接？ |
| [08:59.20] | I guess that's how. 原来是这样 |
| [09:01.10] | Monica,how's it going? 摩妮卡，你好吗？ |
| [09:03.10] | Oh,it's good. It's good. 很好 |
| [09:05.54] | Just here,watering the plants. 我来帮你浇花 |
| [09:07.51] | Don't forget that ficus there by Rachel. 别忘了瑞秋旁边那一盆 |
| [09:12.38] | Chandler's on the couch! 钱德在沙发上 |
| [09:15.78] | I see him. You guys are the worst hiders,ever. 我看到了，你们还真不会躲 |
| [09:18.65] | -Hi. -How you doing? 嗨 你好吗？ |
| [09:23.56] | The other day when you said you needed to talk... 那天你说要找我谈一谈 |
| [09:26.63] | ...just so I know, is it good news or bad news? 请问是好消息还是坏消息？ |
| [09:29.56] | It's good news. It's definitely good news. 好消息，绝对是好消息 |
| [09:32.50] | Hold on a second, I have another call. 等一下，有另一通电话 |
| [09:35.14] | How's it going? 你好吗？ |
| [09:37.04] | It's still me. 还是我 |
| [09:38.54] | I've got picture-in-picture here. 我这里有子画面 |
| [09:42.74] | I'm gonna have to call you back later. 我再回你电话 |
| [09:46.48] | Monica? You. I'm gonna have to call you back. 摩妮卡？我再回你电话 |
| [09:49.72] | So I'll see you soon. 改天见 |
| [09:51.65] | -Okay. I love you. -I love you. 好，我爱你 我爱你 |
| [09:53.75] | We love you too! 我们也爱你 |
| [09:58.63] | Well,it's good news. It's good news. 是好消息，是好消息 |
| [10:01.00] | -What do you think the good news is? -Look at this! 你想是什么好消息？ 你们看 |
| [10:04.37] | He wrote a check for $50,000 to "Hugo Lindgren's Ring Design." 他开了一张五万元的支票 给一位戒指设计师 |
| [10:10.84] | Sorry. What do you think the good news is? 对不起，你想是什么好消息？ |
| [10:15.71] | Oh,my! 天哪 |
| [10:17.08] | Monica's gonna marry a millionaire! 摩妮卡要嫁给百万富翁了 |
| [10:19.61] | You gotta get Mom on the phone! Call Mom! Call Mom! 赶快打给妈，打给妈！打给妈 |
| [10:25.62] | And that's Pete's mom. 那是彼特的妈妈 |
| [10:34.03] | You have to make it a theme wedding. And the theme could be: 你得办一个主题婚礼 主题可以是… |
| [10:37.80] | "Look How Much Money We've Got!" “看我们多有钱啊” |
| [10:41.67] | I mean,you could put money in the invitations. 你可以在喜帖里放钱 |
| [10:44.77] | You could have,like, little-money place settings. 你可以用钱做成餐具 |
| [10:47.61] | And you could start with a money salad. 第一道菜可以上钞票沙拉 |
| [10:50.44] | I mean,it'll be dry, but people will like it. 虽然干了点，绝对受欢迎 |
| [10:53.68] | Would you stop? 别再说了 |
| [10:55.05] | We've only gone out a couple of weeks. 我们才交往两星期 |
| [10:58.65] | But this is Pete. He's not like other people. 他是彼特，跟别人不一样 |
| [11:01.19] | On your first date,you went to Rome. 你们第一次约会就去罗马 |
| [11:03.22] | For most guys,that's like a third or fourth date kind of thing. 对其他男人来说 那是第三、四次约会的事 |
| [11:08.50] | Well,if that's what it is, then it's crazy. 如果他要求婚，那就太夸张了 |
| [11:11.73] | Monica's right. We're talking about marriage here. 摩妮卡说得对 这可是婚姻大事 |
| [11:14.70] | She can't just rush into this. 她不能说嫁就嫁 |
| [11:17.34] | What do you know? You married a lesbian! 你懂什么？你娶了一个女同志 |
| [11:26.15] | I gotta go. I have to break up with Vince. 我要走了，我要去跟文斯分手 |
| [11:28.75] | So you're going with the teacher? 你选了那个老师？ |
| [11:31.09] | I like Vince a lot,you know? But Jason is so sensitive. 我很喜欢文斯，但杰森好感性 |
| [11:35.09] | In the long run,I think sensitive is better than having... 长期来说，感性应该比… |
| [11:38.76] | ...a really,really,really nice body. 身材很猛来得好 |
| [11:46.07] | Jason. Definitely Jason. 杰森，绝对是杰森 |
| [11:48.50] | -Wish me luck! -Good luck! 祝我好运 祝你好运 |
| [11:53.07] | Oh,my God! 万岁！ |
| [11:57.21] | Sorry. 对不起 |
| [11:58.28] | I was imagining what it'd be like to catch the money bouquet. 我在想像接到钞票捧花的感觉 |
| [12:07.62] | Excuse me. Is Vince here? 抱歉，文斯在吗？ |
| [12:10.12] | Oh,sure. 在 |
| [12:15.93] | I didn't know you guys actually used those. 我不晓得你们会真的滑下来 |
| [12:19.43] | So what's up? 什么事？ |
| [12:24.37] | This isn't gonna be easy. 这件事很难启齿 |
| [12:28.04] | I don't think we should see each other anymore. 我们还是别再见面了 |
| [12:36.62] | I'm sorry. 对不起 |
| [12:37.75] | No,it's okay. 没关系 |
| [12:39.62] | It's just that I thought we had something pretty special here. 我还以为我们之间很特别 |
| [12:44.00] | I felt like you were someone I could finally open up to. 我终于找到可以倾诉的对象 |
| [12:48.30] | There's so much in me I haven't shared with you yet. 我还有好多事没跟你分享 |
| [12:51.93] | My God! I didn't know you were so 天哪，我不知道你… |
| [12:53.93] | I'm sorry. I can't talk. 抱歉，我说不出话来了 |
| [12:57.77] | I'm gonna go write in my journal. 我要去写日记 |
| [13:03.58] | Wait! Wait! Wait! 等一下 |
| [13:05.85] | “中央公园” |
| [13:07.52] | If you wanna take care of that thing, go see my herbal guy. 你如果想解决那个问题 就去找我的药草师 |
| [13:11.85] | Thanks. But I wanna remove it, not make it savory. 谢了，我是想切除 不是想做成香料 |
| [13:17.32] | When girls sleep with guys with weird things on their body... 女生发现情人身上长了怪东西 |
| [13:21.26] | ...they tell their friends about it. 都会跟朋友广播 |
| [13:24.17] | Give me that. 拿来 |
| [13:28.47] | Okay,don't be mad at me, but I couldn't resist. 别生我的气，我就是忍不住 |
| [13:32.61] | Bride's Magazines? “新娘杂志”？ |
| [13:34.04] | I know you said you'd say no if he asked you... 我知道你不会答应求婚 |
| [13:36.88] | ... but how great would you look walking down the aisle... 但是穿这套唐娜凯伦走红毯 |
| [13:40.21] | ...in this Donna Karan? 会有多美啊 |
| [13:43.02] | You so would! 一定会很美 |
| [13:45.52] | You should get that anyway. 不结婚也要买 |
| [13:49.36] | Well,for clubbing. 可以穿去俱乐部 |
| [13:52.06] | It is so weird. 很奇怪 |
| [13:53.56] | I know what I said. But this morning... 我说过不会答应 但是今天早上… |
| [13:56.80] | ...I was lying in bed,imagining what it'd be like to say yes. 我躺在床上 想像说“愿意”的感觉 |
| [14:03.40] | I know it's a little sudden, and it's rushed... 我知道有点突然，也很匆促 |
| [14:06.54] | ...and it's not like me to do something like this. 我也不是会做这种事的人 |
| [14:09.38] | But it doesn't mean I can't. Right? 但我可以这么做，对吧？ |
| [14:12.55] | I mean,I'm crazy about Pete. 毕竟我那么爱彼特 |
| [14:14.52] | And I know that we want the same things. 我们追求同样的东西 |
| [14:17.59] | And when I thought about saying yes... 当我想到说“愿意”的感觉 |
| [14:20.09] | ...it made me really happy. 我觉得很快乐 |
| [14:22.06] | Oh,my God! 天哪 |
| [14:25.23] | I know. 我知道 |
| [14:27.33] | I need more pie. 我还要派 |
| [14:31.20] | Mon,if you do get married, can I bring two guests? 要是你真的结婚 我可以带两个人去吗？ |
| [14:38.04] | You didn't break up with that fireman? 你没跟消防员分手？ |
| [14:40.51] | That was my way of telling you. 我就是这个意思 |
| [14:43.18] | Well,it turns out he's incredibly sensitive. 原来他非常感性 |
| [14:45.88] | He keeps a journal and he paints. 他写日记，还画画 |
| [14:48.25] | He even showed me charcoal drawings that he drew of me. 他还为我画了一幅炭笔画 |
| [14:51.42] | He'd prefer watercolors,but he has easy access to a lot of charcoal. 他比较想用水彩画 但是手边有很多黑炭 |
| [14:58.93] | So will you dump Jason? 那你要甩掉杰森吗？ |
| [15:00.59] | Yeah,because I have to break up with someone. 对，我总得跟其中一个分手 |
| [15:04.06] | So Jason is sensitive. But now,so is Vince. 杰森很感性，但文斯也是 |
| [15:08.30] | Plus,Vince has the body. You know? 而文斯又有身材 |
| [15:10.74] | So.... 所以… |
| [15:13.77] | It's really just about the math. 这是算术问题 |
| [15:24.12] | Come on in. 请进 |
| [15:34.30] | You sounded serious on the phone. 你在电话里的语气很严肃 |
| [15:36.46] | Is anything wrong? 出了什么事吗？ |
| [15:56.32] | You must be Ross. 你一定是罗斯 |
| [16:00.35] | I am Guru Saj. 我是萨吉大师 |
| [16:04.19] | Listen,I gotta tell you,I've never been to a guru before,so.... 老实说，我没找过大师 所以… |
| [16:09.26] | Well,relax. 放轻松 |
| [16:10.46] | If it makes you feel any better, I've attended... 我在中部念过很好的医学院 |
| [16:13.30] | ...fine medical schools in Central America. 这样你比较安心了吧 |
| [16:16.34] | Well,let's take a look at this skin abnormality of yours. 来看看你的皮肤异常吧 |
| [16:19.94] | Come on,have a seat. 请坐 |
| [16:25.85] | As I suspected,it's a kundus. 跟我想的一样，是昆度斯 |
| [16:31.12] | What's a "kundus"? 什么是昆度斯？ |
| [16:32.45] | I don't know. What's a kundus with you? 不晓得，对你来说是什么？ |
| [16:40.39] | Please lie down. 请趴下 |
| [16:41.86] | I've got a salve that ought to shrink that right up. 我有一种药膏可以让它缩小 |
| [16:45.83] | I guess it's worth a try. 值得一试 |
| [16:47.90] | Sure. We should see results 那当然，效果应该… |
| [16:50.24] | Clearly not the way to go! 显然不能这么做 |
| [16:54.04] | What? What? 为什么？ |
| [16:55.71] | We appear to have angered it. 我们似乎惹火它了 |
| [16:58.35] | We? We angered it? 我们惹火它了？ |
| [17:02.55] | I think I see the problem. 我看到症结了 |
| [17:05.15] | And I'm afraid we're gonna have to use a much stronger tool. 我们得动用更有力的手段 |
| [17:10.49] | Love. 爱 |
| [17:13.00] | Oh,God! 拜托 |
| [17:16.16] | There is absolutely no way this is gonna come off... 它绝对不可能脱落 |
| [17:20.03] | ... unless you start to.... 除非你用… |
| [17:22.17] | What was that? 怎么了？ |
| [17:24.91] | Well,it's gone. 它掉下来了 |
| [17:27.84] | How's that? 怎么会？ |
| [17:29.34] | Got caught in my watch. 被我的手表刮掉了 |
| [17:36.52] | Lights. 灯光 |
| [17:39.02] | Romantic lights. 浪漫的灯光 |
| [17:42.22] | Nice. 真好 |
| [17:44.09] | So there was this thing I wanted to talk to you about. 我说过有事情要告诉你 |
| [17:48.03] | Oh,right. I'd completely forgot about that. 对喔，我都忘了 |
| [17:54.54] | I've been doing a lot of thinking. 我最近想了很多 |
| [17:57.27] | And I look at my life... 我检讨我的人生 |
| [18:00.71] | ...and I feel like I've conquered the business world. 觉得我已经征服了商场 |
| [18:15.72] | But there's one thing missing. 但是还有一个缺撼 |
| [18:18.76] | What's that? 什么缺撼？ |
| [18:21.60] | It's time for me to conquer the physical world. 我该征服体育界了 |
| [18:31.51] | I wanna become... 我想成为… |
| [18:37.58] | You wanna what? 你想怎样？ |
| [18:40.15] | I wanna be the Ultimate Fighting Champion. 我想成为终极格斗冠军 |
| [18:42.48] | It's the most intense physical competition in the world. 那是全世界最激烈的体能竞技 |
| [18:45.52] | It's banned in 49 states. 在四十九州被禁 |
| [18:47.62] | What are you talking about? 你在说什么？ |
| [18:49.62] | My trainer,Hoshi,is teaching me... 我的教练正在教我… |
| [18:51.76] | ...Jeet Kune Do and Brazilian streetfighting. 截拳道和巴西街头搏击 |
| [18:54.26] | I even had my own octagon training ring designed. 我还请人设计了 专用的八角训练场 |
| [18:57.70] | And I suppose you used a ring designer for that. 所以你找了设计师 （戒指字同拳击场） |
| [19:04.00] | I want you there, in the front row,when I win. 我要你在最前排看我赢得胜利 |
| [19:07.01] | I want you close enough to smell the blood. 我要你近得可以闻到血腥味 |
| [19:11.61] | What do you think? 你意下如何？ |
| [19:14.52] | My parents will be so happy. 我的父母会很高兴 |
| [19:21.92] | Crazy underwear Creeping up my butt 疯狂的内裤 |
| [19:26.63] | Crazy underwear Always in a rut 疯狂的内裤，总是一成不变 |
| [19:30.63] | Crazy underwear 疯狂的内裤… |
| [19:36.27] | What is he doing here? 他来干什么？ |
| [19:38.21] | All right,just keep playing. 继续唱 |
| [19:40.44] | You'll get through this. You'll be fine. 你会安全过关，不会有事 |
| [19:52.89] | Okay,thank you. 谢谢大家 |
| [19:55.56] | And as always,no one talk to me after the show. 依照惯例 演唱完不要跟我说话 |
| [20:04.33] | I was passing by and saw you were playing. 我刚好路过，看到你在表演 |
| [20:06.73] | This is cool,seeing you up there. 你在台上的感觉好棒 |
| [20:12.24] | What's going on here? Who's this guy? 怎么回事？他是谁？ |
| [20:15.41] | I don't know! He just started kissing me. Get him,Vince! 我不知道，他突然跑来亲我 快捉住他 |
| [20:20.88] | What? 什么？ |
| [20:23.42] | I've been dating both of you. 我同时跟你们交往 |
| [20:27.09] | And it's been really horrible, because it's been... 这种感觉很差，因为… |
| [20:30.42] | ...a lot of fun for me. 实在很过瘾 |
| [20:35.40] | But I like you both... 你们两个我都喜欢 |
| [20:38.67] | ...and I didn't know how to choose. 我不知道该选谁 |
| [20:41.17] | So I'm sorry. I'm terrible. I'm a terrible person. 对不起，我很差劲 我太差劲了 |
| [20:46.04] | Relax. It's okay. I mean.... 别这样，没关系 |
| [20:48.84] | We never said this was exclusive. 我们又没说只能跟彼此交往 |
| [20:51.45] | Neither did we. So give yourself a break. 我们也是，你别太自责 |
| [20:55.18] | Really? 真的？ |
| [20:57.42] | We haven't been going out that long. 我们交往的时间又不长 |
| [20:59.92] | Come on,we haven't even slept together yet. 甚至还没上过床 |
| [21:03.36] | You haven't? 你们没有？ |
| [21:07.56] | You have? 你们有？ |
| [21:08.60] | Well,this is none of my business. 这是你们的问题 |
| [21:13.70] | I can't believe this! You slept with him? 我真不敢相信 你跟他上床了？ |
| [21:17.07] | Well,I made you a candlelight dinner in the park. 我陪你在公园吃过烛光晚餐啊 |
| [21:21.94] | I'm gonna make this real easy for you. 我来替你省掉一个麻烦 |
| [21:30.82] | That could've been really awkward. 幸好没有太难看 |
| [21:36.29] | You made him a candlelight dinner in the park? 你陪他在公园吃烛光晚餐？ |
| [21:39.73] | Yeah,but I can do that for you. I'm gonna do that for you. 我也可以陪你吃，我会陪你吃 |
| [21:43.40] | I can't believe I went out with somebody... 我居然跟一个… |
| [21:46.13] | ...who'd have an open flame in the middle of a wooded area! 在林木区点火的人交往 |
| [21:59.05] | Everything's gonna be all right. 不会有事的 |
| [22:02.65] | Okay,Dick? 好吗，狄克？ |
| [22:07.22] | Hello. I am Guru Saj. 你们好，我是萨吉大师 |
| [22:12.66] | He's a duck,right? Because otherwise... 他是鸭子吧？否则… |
| [22:15.33] | ...this is way out of my league. 就超出我的能力范围了 |
| [22:18.30] | He's got a really bad cough, and our vet can't stop it. 他咳得很严重，兽医治不好 |
| [22:22.47] | Is there something you can do? 你有办法吗？ |
| [22:24.64] | Let me see. 我看看 |
| [22:26.94] | Let me see. 我看看 |
| [22:30.64] | Do you think you could get him to eat a bat? 你能让他吃下蝙蝠吗？ |
| [02:34.-4] | If Joey and I play with matches, we could get you up to an even 100. yao shi qiao yi he wo wan huo chai jiu ke yi rang ni lei ji dao yi bai |
| [05:08.-2] | Oh, my God! tian na |
| [06:27.-4] | ... if you know what I mean. dong wo de yi si ba? |
| [06:43.-3] | Why don' t you break up with one of them? he bu gen qi zhong yi ge fen shou? |
| [08:16.-3] | See? You just need the right command. kan dao le ma? xia dui zhi ling jiu xing le |
| [08:48.-3] | Joey, put that down. qiao yi, fang xia |
| [10:57.-4] | We don' t know if he' ll propose. ye bu zhi dao ta hui bu hui qiu hun |
| [12:34.-1] | Good deal. hen hao |
| [18:05.-4] | And I feel like I' ve conquered the intellectual world. wo yi jing zheng fu le zhi shi jie |
| [18:09.-1] | And now I have the most beautiful woman in the world. xian zai you yong you shi jie shang zui mei di nv ren |
| [18:34.-2] | ... the Ultimate Fighting Champion. zhong ji ge dou guan jun |
| [00:03.20] | Wouldn' t it be cool if our duck and our chick had a baby? yao shi wo men de ji ya sheng xiao bao bao bu shi hen ku? |
| [00:06.53] | We could call it Chuck. ke yi jiao ta cha ke |
| [00:10.31] | Or Dick. huo di ke |
| [00:15.68] | Listen, I need a favor. wo yao qing ni men bang mang |
| [00:19.15] | I was in the shower, and as I was... wo gang cai xi zao, zheng zai |
| [00:21.82] | ... cleansing myself, I felt something. xi shen ti shi, fa xian yi jian shi |
| [00:25.65] | Was it like a sneeze, only better? hen xiang da pen ti, dan shi gan jue geng shuang? |
| [00:30.76] | No. I mean, like, a thing on my body. bu shi, shi wo shen shang zhang le dong xi |
| [00:33.73] | Well, what was it? shen me dong xi? |
| [00:35.16] | Well, I don' t know. It' s kind of in a place that' s not.... bu xiao de, ta zhang zai wo bu neng |
| [00:39.03] | It' s not visually accessible to me. And I was hoping maybe you guys... wo kan bu dao, wo xiang ma fan ni men |
| [00:43.34] | ... could help me out. bang wo kan yi xia |
| [00:47.38] | Come on, you guys! It' s no big deal! bai tuo, you mei shen me |
| [00:53.85] | Well, what is it? Is it a mole? shi shen me? shi zhi ma? |
| [00:58.29] | No, it' s too wrinkly to be a mole. bu shi, tai zhou le, bu shi zhi |
| [01:01.22] | Is it? What, a pimple? na shi dou zi ma? |
| [01:06.46] | No, it' s... bu shi, ta |
| [01:08.23] | ... fancier than a pimple. bi qing chun dou gao ji |
| [01:10.43] | Ross, just go see a doc Guys, what' s? ni jiu qu kan yi ni men zai gan |
| [01:18.37] | Well, it' s definite. Two more weeks of winter. que ding le, dong tian hai you liang xing qi |
| [01:21.48] | Yeah, right. mei cuo |
| [01:23.58] | The One With Ross' Thing ben ji bo chu:" gua ren you ji" |
| [02:14.66] | And this is the coffeehouse. This is where I play my music. zhe shi ka fei guan, wo dou zai zhe li biao yan |
| [02:18.53] | Good deal. These are my friends. piao liang ta men shi wo de peng you |
| [02:20.84] | People? This is Vince. Vince, the people. ge wei, zhe shi wen si wen si, wo de peng you |
| [02:25.91] | Vince is a fireman. wen si shi xiao fang yuan |
| [02:28.64] | Have you ever rescued anyone from a burning building? ni cong ran shao de da lou li jiu guo ren ma? |
| [02:31.38] | Ninetyeight hot saves. Highest on the force. jiu shi ba ci, dui shang di yi gao |
| [02:40.05] | Fire safety is not a joke, son. hai zi, bu neng na huo zai kai wan xiao |
| [02:44.79] | You' re right. I know. ni shuo de dui, wo zhi dao |
| [02:47.63] | Look, I gotta go. I' m on call tonight. wo yao zou le, wan shang yao zhi ban |
| [02:50.06] | See you Saturday. xing qi liu jian |
| [02:54.57] | He' s cute, Pheebs. fei bi, ta hao ke ai |
| [02:56.00] | But you just started dating that teacher. dan ni bu shi gang he na ge lao shi jiao wang? |
| [02:58.27] | Oh, Jason? jie sen? |
| [02:59.47] | We' re seeing each other tonight. wo men wan shang yao jian mian |
| [03:01.58] | Well, Pheebs? fei bi? |
| [03:03.58] | Two dates in one day? That' s so unlike you. jiao ta liang tiao chuan? ni bu xiang zhe zhong ren |
| [03:06.41] | I know, I know. I' m, like, playing the field. wo ye zhi dao wo zai you xi ren jian |
| [03:09.85] | I' m juggling two guys. I' m sowing my wild oats. wo zai wan nong bie ren, gao qi nian san |
| [03:14.19] | You know, this kind of, like, oatsowing, fieldplaying juggler. wo shi gao qi nian san de hua xin luo bo |
| [03:18.66] | So do they know about each other? ta men zhi dao dui fang de cun zai ma? |
| [03:21.10] | Does a dog' s lips move when he reads? gou gou nian shu shi, zui chun hui dong ma? |
| [03:27.80] | Okay, no, they don' t know. ta men bu zhi dao |
| [03:31.87] | Hey, guys. ge wei |
| [03:36.34] | Well? How' d it go at the doctor' s? zen me yang? yi sheng zen me shuo? |
| [03:38.55] | He said there' s definitely nothing to worry about. It' s benign. ta shuo bu yong dan xin, shi liang xing de |
| [03:42.68] | What is it? He couldn' t even tell me. shi shen me? ta gen ben shuo bu chu lai |
| [03:45.12] | He said it was just some sort of " skin abnormality." ta zhi shuo shi yi zhong pi fu yi chang |
| [03:51.06] | The worse thing is, he said, being unable to identify it... geng zao de shi ta shuo, you yu wu fa bian ren |
| [03:54.70] | ... he was reluctant to remove it. ta bu yuan yi wei wo qie chu |
| [03:56.83] | You should go to my guy. ni ying gai qu zhao wo de yi sheng |
| [03:58.47] | Because when I went in there with my third nipple... wo qu zhao ta shi |
| [04:02.14] | ... he just lopped it right off. ta zhi jie jiu ba ta gei qie le |
| [04:04.54] | So I guess I' m lucky. wo man xing yun de |
| [04:06.54] | I mean, not as lucky as people who are born with two nipples. sui ran bi bu shang tian sheng liang ge de ren |
| [04:11.31] | At least they knew what yours was. You know? Yours had a name. zhi shao ta men zhi dao ni zhang le shen me ni de you ming zi |
| [04:16.18] | Maybe they' ll name yours after you. ye xu yi xue jie hui yi ni wei ming |
| [04:19.32] | You know? They' d call it " The Ross." ba ta jiao zuo" luo si" |
| [04:22.09] | And then people would be, like, " Oh, he' s got a Ross." da jia hui shuo hai, ta zhang le yi ge luo si |
| [04:27.43] | Yeah, that' d be cool. shi a, zhen ku |
| [04:31.33] | Pete' s breaking up with me. bi te yao gen wo fen shou |
| [04:33.23] | What? shen me? |
| [04:34.90] | I just checked my messages. wo gang cai ting liu yan |
| [04:36.77] | He said that when he gets back, " We need to talk." ta shuo deng ta hui lai " wo men de tan yi tan" |
| [04:40.51] | And? Well, that' s it. ran hou ne? jiu zhe yang |
| [04:42.21] | People never say," We need to talk," unless it' s something bad. mei you ren hui shuo" wo men de tan yi tan" chu fei shi huai shi |
| [04:45.85] | That doesn' t necessarily mean he' s breaking up with you. na bu yi ding dai biao ta yao gen ni fen shou |
| [04:49.28] | Really? zhen de? |
| [04:50.35] | Maybe he just cheated on you. ye xu ta zhi shi dui ni bu zhong |
| [04:57.76] | I won' t get rich doing it, but I gotta say, it' s cool... zhe me zuo mei you hao chu dan wo hai shi hen gao xing |
| [05:01.46] | ... knowing you' re making a difference in a kid' s life. wo gai bian le yi ge hai zi |
| [05:04.57] | That is so great. zhen hao |
| [05:09.77] | Oh, my God! tian na |
| [05:11.31] | We' d better call the fire department. gan kuai tong zhi xiao fang dui |
| [05:14.38] | Well, we don' t need a fireman. bu bi zhao xiao fang yuan ba |
| [05:16.64] | We need, like, a good mechanic. ying gai zhao hao de hei shou lai |
| [05:20.82] | Here they come! We gotta get out of here! ta men lai le, kuai tao |
| [05:23.82] | Wait. Why? deng yi xia, wei shi me? |
| [05:24.92] | If I wanted to see a fireman, I' d date one. yao shi wo xiang kan xiao fang yuan wo hui zhao xiao fang yuan yue hui |
| [05:30.33] | That' s all it is. A third nipple. zhi shi yi ge duo chu lai de |
| [05:32.49] | You know? Just your runofthemill third nipple. hen pu tong de di san ge |
| [05:36.26] | You can take it off. Just slice that baby right off. ni ke yi ba ta qie diao, zhi jie qie diao |
| [05:40.00] | Take your shirt off. Let' s see what we' re dealing with. ba shang yi tuo diao rang wo kan yi xia |
| [05:45.84] | What are you doing? ni zai gan shen me? |
| [05:48.34] | Just showing you my runofthemill, sliceitrightoff third nipple. rang ni kan na ge fei chang pu tong ke yi zhi jie qie diao de |
| [05:53.08] | Well, that' s not a third nipple. zhe bu shi di san ge |
| [05:55.85] | First of all, it' s on your ass |
| [05:59.29] | Well, then what is it? bu ran shi shen me? |
| [06:01.29] | Wait a minute. Hold it. deng yi xia |
| [06:05.33] | Jansen, come in here. I' m with Hamilton! zhan sen, lai yi xia wo zai gen han mi dun jiang hua |
| [06:08.36] | He' s good with weird things. Bring him in too. ta dui guai dong xi hen zai hang, jiao ta ye lai |
| [06:13.53] | I gotta go water Pete' s plants. wo de qu bang bi te jiao hua |
| [06:15.80] | You know what? If he' s gonna break up with me, maybe I won' t water them. ni men zhi dao ma? ru guo ta xiang fen shou, wo jiu bu jiao le |
| [06:20.21] | If he' s gonna break up with you, maybe Joey and I should do it... ru guo ta yao fen shou gan cui rang qiao yi he wo qu" jiao" |
| [06:29.52] | Or... huo zhe |
| [06:31.29] | ... we could go and pee on them. wo men ke yi qu dui zhuo hua pen sa niao |
| [06:36.29] | I can' t take it, you know. wo shou bu liao le |
| [06:38.23] | I' m afraid one of them will catch me with the other. wo hao pa hui bei zhuo dao |
| [06:41.30] | It' s making me crazy! wo kuai feng le |
| [06:46.47] | What happened to playing the field? ni bu shi zai you xi ren jian? |
| [06:50.00] | It doesn' t feel like playing anymore. xian zai bu xiang you xi le |
| [06:52.37] | It' s feels like work. It' s like I' m working in the field. bi jiao xiang gong zuo wo hao xiang zai zuo tian ye diao cha |
| [06:56.48] | So pick one of them. na jiu xuan yi ge |
| [06:58.18] | Which one do you like more? ni bi jiao xi huan na yi ge? |
| [06:59.51] | Vince is great, you know? Because he' s, like, a " guy" guy. wen si hen bang, ta shi nan ren zhong de nan ren |
| [07:04.19] | He' s just so burly, so very burly. ta hao zhuang, zhen de hao zhuang |
| [07:09.86] | Okay, good. So there you go. Go with Vince. hao, na jiu xuan wen si ba |
| [07:13.06] | But Jason' s really sensitive. dan shi jie sen hao gan xing |
| [07:14.90] | Sensitive is important. Pick him. gan xing hen zhong yao, xuan ta |
| [07:18.33] | Oh, sure. Go with the sissy. shi a, ting niang niang qiang de hua |
| [07:22.37] | Jason is not a sissy. jie sen cai bu niang niang qiang |
| [07:25.17] | I meant Chandler. wo shi shuo qian de |
| [07:37.75] | You know, I have dinner plans. wo wan shang you yue |
| [07:41.72] | Thank you so much for coming on such a short notice. xie xie ge wei lin shi gan lai |
| [07:45.53] | Ladies and gentlemen, I' ve been practicing medicine for 23 years... ge wei xian sheng nv shi wo xing yi 23 nian |
| [07:50.73] | ... and I' m stumped. xian zai que bei nan dao le |
| [08:04.51] | Okay, this is the den. zhe li shi shu fang |
| [08:06.08] | All right, check this out. Lights! ni men kan o deng guang |
| [08:09.28] | All right, less lights! Bad lights! shao yi dian guang bu hao de guang |
| [08:12.39] | Lights, go away! deng guang zou kai |
| [08:19.09] | And the dimmer switch. ye ke yi yong diao de |
| [08:22.46] | For a rich guy, that' s a small TV. ta na me you qian, dian shi hai zhen xiao |
| [08:24.83] | That' s the video phone. na shi shi xun dian hua |
| [08:26.63] | But you shouldn' t be here. So don' t touch anything. ni men bu neng lai de, suo yi bu yao luan peng |
| [08:30.61] | IKEA, this is comfortable! yi jia jia ju, hao shu fu |
| [08:34.84] | This place is amazing! zhe li tai gao ji le |
| [08:37.25] | Oh, God! That' s the nicest kitchen. I know. na ge chu fang hao bang wo zhi dao |
| [08:40.18] | It' s the nicest kitchen. wo shi chu de |
| [08:41.68] | The refrigerator told me to have a great day. bing xiang hai hui zhu wo jin tian yu kuai |
| [08:45.82] | Look, a millionaire' s checkbook. ni men kan, bai wan fu weng de zhi piao bu |
| [08:51.03] | Oh, my God, that' s Pete. Get out! tian na, shi bi te, kuai chu qu! |
| [08:53.29] | How the hell do you answer a video phone? shi xun dian hua yao zen me jie? |
| [08:59.20] | I guess that' s how. yuan lai shi zhe yang |
| [09:01.10] | Monica, how' s it going? mo ni ka, ni hao ma? |
| [09:03.10] | Oh, it' s good. It' s good. hen hao |
| [09:05.54] | Just here, watering the plants. wo lai bang ni jiao hua |
| [09:07.51] | Don' t forget that ficus there by Rachel. bie wang le rui qiu pang bian na yi pen |
| [09:12.38] | Chandler' s on the couch! qian de zai sha fa shang |
| [09:15.78] | I see him. You guys are the worst hiders, ever. wo kan dao le, ni men hai zhen bu hui duo |
| [09:18.65] | Hi. How you doing? hai ni hao ma? |
| [09:23.56] | The other day when you said you needed to talk... na tian ni shuo yao zhao wo tan yi tan |
| [09:26.63] | ... just so I know, is it good news or bad news? qing wen shi hao xiao xi hai shi huai xiao xi? |
| [09:29.56] | It' s good news. It' s definitely good news. hao xiao xi, jue dui shi hao xiao xi |
| [09:32.50] | Hold on a second, I have another call. deng yi xia, you ling yi tong dian hua |
| [09:35.14] | How' s it going? ni hao ma? |
| [09:37.04] | It' s still me. hai shi wo |
| [09:38.54] | I' ve got pictureinpicture here. wo zhe li you zi hua mian |
| [09:42.74] | I' m gonna have to call you back later. wo zai hui ni dian hua |
| [09:46.48] | Monica? You. I' m gonna have to call you back. mo ni ka? wo zai hui ni dian hua |
| [09:49.72] | So I' ll see you soon. gai tian jian |
| [09:51.65] | Okay. I love you. I love you. hao, wo ai ni wo ai ni |
| [09:53.75] | We love you too! wo men ye ai ni |
| [09:58.63] | Well, it' s good news. It' s good news. shi hao xiao xi, shi hao xiao xi |
| [10:01.00] | What do you think the good news is? Look at this! ni xiang shi shen me hao xiao xi? ni men kan |
| [10:04.37] | He wrote a check for 50, 000 to " Hugo Lindgren' s Ring Design." ta kai le yi zhang wu wan yuan de zhi piao gei yi wei jie zhi she ji shi |
| [10:10.84] | Sorry. What do you think the good news is? dui bu qi, ni xiang shi shen me hao xiao xi? |
| [10:15.71] | Oh, my! tian na |
| [10:17.08] | Monica' s gonna marry a millionaire! mo ni ka yao jia gei bai wan fu weng le |
| [10:19.61] | You gotta get Mom on the phone! Call Mom! Call Mom! gan kuai da gei ma, da gei ma! da gei ma |
| [10:25.62] | And that' s Pete' s mom. na shi bi te de ma ma |
| [10:34.03] | You have to make it a theme wedding. And the theme could be: ni de ban yi ge zhu ti hun li zhu ti ke yi shi |
| [10:37.80] | " Look How Much Money We' ve Got!" " kan wo men duo you qian a" |
| [10:41.67] | I mean, you could put money in the invitations. ni ke yi zai xi tie li fang qian |
| [10:44.77] | You could have, like, littlemoney place settings. ni ke yi yong qian zuo cheng can ju |
| [10:47.61] | And you could start with a money salad. di yi dao cai ke yi shang chao piao sha la |
| [10:50.44] | I mean, it' ll be dry, but people will like it. sui ran gan le dian, jue dui shou huan ying |
| [10:53.68] | Would you stop? bie zai shuo le |
| [10:55.05] | We' ve only gone out a couple of weeks. wo men cai jiao wang liang xing qi |
| [10:58.65] | But this is Pete. He' s not like other people. ta shi bi te, gen bie ren bu yi yang |
| [11:01.19] | On your first date, you went to Rome. ni men di yi ci yue hui jiu qu luo ma |
| [11:03.22] | For most guys, that' s like a third or fourth date kind of thing. dui qi ta nan ren lai shuo na shi di san si ci yue hui de shi |
| [11:08.50] | Well, if that' s what it is, then it' s crazy. ru guo ta yao qiu hun, na jiu tai kua zhang le |
| [11:11.73] | Monica' s right. We' re talking about marriage here. mo ni ka shuo de dui zhe ke shi hun yin da shi |
| [11:14.70] | She can' t just rush into this. ta bu neng shuo jia jiu jia |
| [11:17.34] | What do you know? You married a lesbian! ni dong shen me? ni qu le yi ge nv tong zhi |
| [11:26.15] | I gotta go. I have to break up with Vince. wo yao zou le, wo yao qu gen wen si fen shou |
| [11:28.75] | So you' re going with the teacher? ni xuan le na ge lao shi? |
| [11:31.09] | I like Vince a lot, you know? But Jason is so sensitive. wo hen xi huan wen si, dan jie sen hao gan xing |
| [11:35.09] | In the long run, I think sensitive is better than having... chang qi lai shuo, gan xing ying gai bi |
| [11:38.76] | ... a really, really, really nice body. shen cai hen meng lai de hao |
| [11:46.07] | Jason. Definitely Jason. jie sen, jue dui shi jie sen |
| [11:48.50] | Wish me luck! Good luck! zhu wo hao yun zhu ni hao yun |
| [11:53.07] | Oh, my God! wan sui! |
| [11:57.21] | Sorry. dui bu qi |
| [11:58.28] | I was imagining what it' d be like to catch the money bouquet. wo zai xiang xiang jie dao chao piao peng hua de gan jue |
| [12:07.62] | Excuse me. Is Vince here? bao qian, wen si zai ma? |
| [12:10.12] | Oh, sure. zai |
| [12:15.93] | I didn' t know you guys actually used those. wo bu xiao de ni men hui zhen de hua xia lai |
| [12:19.43] | So what' s up? shen me shi? |
| [12:24.37] | This isn' t gonna be easy. zhe jian shi hen nan qi chi |
| [12:28.04] | I don' t think we should see each other anymore. wo men hai shi bie zai jian mian le |
| [12:36.62] | I' m sorry. dui bu qi |
| [12:37.75] | No, it' s okay. mei guan xi |
| [12:39.62] | It' s just that I thought we had something pretty special here. wo hai yi wei wo men zhi jian hen te bie |
| [12:44.00] | I felt like you were someone I could finally open up to. wo zhong yu zhao dao ke yi qing su de dui xiang |
| [12:48.30] | There' s so much in me I haven' t shared with you yet. wo hai you hao duo shi mei gen ni fen xiang |
| [12:51.93] | My God! I didn' t know you were so tian na, wo bu zhi dao ni |
| [12:53.93] | I' m sorry. I can' t talk. bao qian, wo shuo bu chu hua lai le |
| [12:57.77] | I' m gonna go write in my journal. wo yao qu xie ri ji |
| [13:03.58] | Wait! Wait! Wait! deng yi xia |
| [13:05.85] | " zhong yang gong yuan" |
| [13:07.52] | If you wanna take care of that thing, go see my herbal guy. ni ru guo xiang jie jue na ge wen ti jiu qu zhao wo de yao cao shi |
| [13:11.85] | Thanks. But I wanna remove it, not make it savory. xie le, wo shi xiang qie chu bu shi xiang zuo cheng xiang liao |
| [13:17.32] | When girls sleep with guys with weird things on their body... nv sheng fa xian qing ren shen shang zhang le guai dong xi |
| [13:21.26] | ... they tell their friends about it. dou hui gen peng you guang bo |
| [13:24.17] | Give me that. na lai |
| [13:28.47] | Okay, don' t be mad at me, but I couldn' t resist. bie sheng wo de qi, wo jiu shi ren bu zhu |
| [13:32.61] | Bride' s Magazines? " xin niang za zhi"? |
| [13:34.04] | I know you said you' d say no if he asked you... wo zhi dao ni bu hui da ying qiu hun |
| [13:36.88] | ... but how great would you look walking down the aisle... dan shi chuan zhe tao tang na kai lun zou hong tan |
| [13:40.21] | ... in this Donna Karan? hui you duo mei a |
| [13:43.02] | You so would! yi ding hui hen mei |
| [13:45.52] | You should get that anyway. bu jie hun ye yao mai |
| [13:49.36] | Well, for clubbing. ke yi chuan qu ju le bu |
| [13:52.06] | It is so weird. hen qi guai |
| [13:53.56] | I know what I said. But this morning... wo shuo guo bu hui da ying dan shi jin tian zao shang |
| [13:56.80] | ... I was lying in bed, imagining what it' d be like to say yes. wo tang zai chuang shang xiang xiang shuo" yuan yi" de gan jue |
| [14:03.40] | I know it' s a little sudden, and it' s rushed... wo zhi dao you dian tu ran, ye hen cong cu |
| [14:06.54] | ... and it' s not like me to do something like this. wo ye bu shi hui zuo zhe zhong shi de ren |
| [14:09.38] | But it doesn' t mean I can' t. Right? dan wo ke yi zhe me zuo, dui ba? |
| [14:12.55] | I mean, I' m crazy about Pete. bi jing wo na me ai bi te |
| [14:14.52] | And I know that we want the same things. wo men zhui qiu tong yang de dong xi |
| [14:17.59] | And when I thought about saying yes... dang wo xiang dao shuo" yuan yi" de gan jue |
| [14:20.09] | ... it made me really happy. wo jue de hen kuai le |
| [14:22.06] | Oh, my God! tian na |
| [14:25.23] | I know. wo zhi dao |
| [14:27.33] | I need more pie. wo hai yao pai |
| [14:31.20] | Mon, if you do get married, can I bring two guests? yao shi ni zhen de jie hun wo ke yi dai liang ge ren qu ma? |
| [14:38.04] | You didn' t break up with that fireman? ni mei gen xiao fang yuan fen shou? |
| [14:40.51] | That was my way of telling you. wo jiu shi zhe ge yi si |
| [14:43.18] | Well, it turns out he' s incredibly sensitive. yuan lai ta fei chang gan xing |
| [14:45.88] | He keeps a journal and he paints. ta xie ri ji, hai hua hua |
| [14:48.25] | He even showed me charcoal drawings that he drew of me. ta hai wei wo hua le yi fu tan bi hua |
| [14:51.42] | He' d prefer watercolors, but he has easy access to a lot of charcoal. ta bi jiao xiang yong shui cai hua dan shi shou bian you hen duo hei tan |
| [14:58.93] | So will you dump Jason? na ni yao shuai diao jie sen ma? |
| [15:00.59] | Yeah, because I have to break up with someone. dui, wo zong dei gen qi zhong yi ge fen shou |
| [15:04.06] | So Jason is sensitive. But now, so is Vince. jie sen hen gan xing, dan wen si ye shi |
| [15:08.30] | Plus, Vince has the body. You know? er wen si you you shen cai |
| [15:10.74] | So.... suo yi |
| [15:13.77] | It' s really just about the math. zhe shi suan shu wen ti |
| [15:24.12] | Come on in. qing jin |
| [15:34.30] | You sounded serious on the phone. ni zai dian hua li de yu qi hen yan su |
| [15:36.46] | Is anything wrong? chu le shen me shi ma? |
| [15:56.32] | You must be Ross. ni yi ding shi luo si |
| [16:00.35] | I am Guru Saj. wo shi sa ji da shi |
| [16:04.19] | Listen, I gotta tell you, I' ve never been to a guru before, so.... lao shi shuo, wo mei zhao guo da shi suo yi |
| [16:09.26] | Well, relax. fang qing song |
| [16:10.46] | If it makes you feel any better, I' ve attended... wo zai zhong bu nian guo hen hao de yi xue yuan |
| [16:13.30] | ... fine medical schools in Central America. zhe yang ni bi jiao an xin le ba |
| [16:16.34] | Well, let' s take a look at this skin abnormality of yours. lai kan kan ni de pi fu yi chang ba |
| [16:19.94] | Come on, have a seat. qing zuo |
| [16:25.85] | As I suspected, it' s a kundus. gen wo xiang de yi yang, shi kun du si |
| [16:31.12] | What' s a " kundus"? shen me shi kun du si? |
| [16:32.45] | I don' t know. What' s a kundus with you? bu xiao de, dui ni lai shuo shi shen me? |
| [16:40.39] | Please lie down. qing pa xia |
| [16:41.86] | I' ve got a salve that ought to shrink that right up. wo you yi zhong yao gao ke yi rang ta suo xiao |
| [16:45.83] | I guess it' s worth a try. zhi de yi shi |
| [16:47.90] | Sure. We should see results na dang ran, xiao guo ying gai |
| [16:50.24] | Clearly not the way to go! xian ran bu neng zhe me zuo |
| [16:54.04] | What? What? wei shi me? |
| [16:55.71] | We appear to have angered it. wo men si hu re huo ta le |
| [16:58.35] | We? We angered it? wo men re huo ta le? |
| [17:02.55] | I think I see the problem. wo kan dao zheng jie le |
| [17:05.15] | And I' m afraid we' re gonna have to use a much stronger tool. wo men de dong yong geng you li de shou duan |
| [17:10.49] | Love. ai |
| [17:13.00] | Oh, God! bai tuo |
| [17:16.16] | There is absolutely no way this is gonna come off... ta jue dui bu ke neng tuo luo |
| [17:20.03] | ... unless you start to.... chu fei ni yong |
| [17:22.17] | What was that? zen me le? |
| [17:24.91] | Well, it' s gone. ta diao xia lai le |
| [17:27.84] | How' s that? zen me hui? |
| [17:29.34] | Got caught in my watch. bei wo de shou biao gua diao le |
| [17:36.52] | Lights. deng guang |
| [17:39.02] | Romantic lights. lang man de deng guang |
| [17:42.22] | Nice. zhen hao |
| [17:44.09] | So there was this thing I wanted to talk to you about. wo shuo guo you shi qing yao gao su ni |
| [17:48.03] | Oh, right. I' d completely forgot about that. dui o, wo dou wang le |
| [17:54.54] | I' ve been doing a lot of thinking. wo zui jin xiang le hen duo |
| [17:57.27] | And I look at my life... wo jian tao wo de ren sheng |
| [18:00.71] | ... and I feel like I' ve conquered the business world. jue de wo yi jing zheng fu le shang chang |
| [18:15.72] | But there' s one thing missing. dan shi hai you yi ge que han |
| [18:18.76] | What' s that? shen me que han? |
| [18:21.60] | It' s time for me to conquer the physical world. wo gai zheng fu ti yu jie le |
| [18:31.51] | I wanna become... wo xiang cheng wei |
| [18:37.58] | You wanna what? ni xiang zen yang? |
| [18:40.15] | I wanna be the Ultimate Fighting Champion. wo xiang cheng wei zhong ji ge dou guan jun |
| [18:42.48] | It' s the most intense physical competition in the world. na shi quan shi jie zui ji lie de ti neng jing ji |
| [18:45.52] | It' s banned in 49 states. zai si shi jiu zhou bei jin |
| [18:47.62] | What are you talking about? ni zai shuo shi mo? |
| [18:49.62] | My trainer, Hoshi, is teaching me... wo de jiao lian zheng zai jiao wo |
| [18:51.76] | ... Jeet Kune Do and Brazilian streetfighting. jie quan dao he ba xi jie tou bo ji |
| [18:54.26] | I even had my own octagon training ring designed. wo hai qing ren she ji le zhuan yong de ba jiao xun lian chang |
| [18:57.70] | And I suppose you used a ring designer for that. suo yi ni zhao le she ji shi jie zhi zi tong quan ji chang |
| [19:04.00] | I want you there, in the front row, when I win. wo yao ni zai zui qian pai kan wo ying de sheng li |
| [19:07.01] | I want you close enough to smell the blood. wo yao ni jin de ke yi wen dao xue xing wei |
| [19:11.61] | What do you think? ni yi xia ru he? |
| [19:14.52] | My parents will be so happy. wo de fu mu hui hen gao xing |
| [19:21.92] | Crazy underwear Creeping up my butt feng kuang de nei ku |
| [19:26.63] | Crazy underwear Always in a rut feng kuang de nei ku, zong shi yi cheng bu bian |
| [19:30.63] | Crazy underwear feng kuang de nei ku |
| [19:36.27] | What is he doing here? ta lai gan shen me? |
| [19:38.21] | All right, just keep playing. ji xu chang |
| [19:40.44] | You' ll get through this. You' ll be fine. ni hui an quan guo guan, bu hui you shi |
| [19:52.89] | Okay, thank you. xie xie da jia |
| [19:55.56] | And as always, no one talk to me after the show. yi zhao guan li yan chang wan bu yao gen wo shuo hua |
| [20:04.33] | I was passing by and saw you were playing. wo gang hao lu guo, kan dao ni zai biao yan |
| [20:06.73] | This is cool, seeing you up there. ni zai tai shang de gan jue hao bang |
| [20:12.24] | What' s going on here? Who' s this guy? zen me hui shi? ta shi shui? |
| [20:15.41] | I don' t know! He just started kissing me. Get him, Vince! wo bu zhi dao, ta tu ran pao lai qin wo kuai zhuo zhu ta |
| [20:20.88] | What? shen me? |
| [20:23.42] | I' ve been dating both of you. wo tong shi gen ni men jiao wang |
| [20:27.09] | And it' s been really horrible, because it' s been... zhe zhong gan jue hen cha, yin wei |
| [20:30.42] | ... a lot of fun for me. shi zai hen guo yin |
| [20:35.40] | But I like you both... ni men liang ge wo dou xi huan |
| [20:38.67] | ... and I didn' t know how to choose. wo bu zhi dao gai xuan shui |
| [20:41.17] | So I' m sorry. I' m terrible. I' m a terrible person. dui bu qi, wo hen cha jin wo tai cha jin le |
| [20:46.04] | Relax. It' s okay. I mean.... bie zhe yang, mei guan xi |
| [20:48.84] | We never said this was exclusive. wo men you mei shuo zhi neng gen bi ci jiao wang |
| [20:51.45] | Neither did we. So give yourself a break. wo men ye shi, ni bie tai zi ze |
| [20:55.18] | Really? zhen de? |
| [20:57.42] | We haven' t been going out that long. wo men jiao wang de shi jian you bu zhang |
| [20:59.92] | Come on, we haven' t even slept together yet. shen zhi hai mei shang guo chuang |
| [21:03.36] | You haven' t? ni men mei you? |
| [21:07.56] | You have? ni men you? |
| [21:08.60] | Well, this is none of my business. zhe shi ni men de wen ti |
| [21:13.70] | I can' t believe this! You slept with him? wo zhen bu gan xiang xin ni gen ta shang chuang le? |
| [21:17.07] | Well, I made you a candlelight dinner in the park. wo pei ni zai gong yuan chi guo zhu guang wan can a |
| [21:21.94] | I' m gonna make this real easy for you. wo lai ti ni sheng diao yi ge ma fan |
| [21:30.82] | That could' ve been really awkward. xing hao mei you tai nan kan |
| [21:36.29] | You made him a candlelight dinner in the park? ni pei ta zai gong yuan chi zhu guang wan can? |
| [21:39.73] | Yeah, but I can do that for you. I' m gonna do that for you. wo ye ke yi pei ni chi, wo hui pei ni chi |
| [21:43.40] | I can' t believe I went out with somebody... wo ju ran gen yi ge |
| [21:46.13] | ... who' d have an open flame in the middle of a wooded area! zai lin mu qu dian huo de ren jiao wang |
| [21:59.05] | Everything' s gonna be all right. bu hui you shi de |
| [22:02.65] | Okay, Dick? hao ma, di ke? |
| [22:07.22] | Hello. I am Guru Saj. ni men hao, wo shi sa ji da shi |
| [22:12.66] | He' s a duck, right? Because otherwise... ta shi ya zi ba? fou ze |
| [22:15.33] | ... this is way out of my league. jiu chao chu wo de neng li fan wei le |
| [22:18.30] | He' s got a really bad cough, and our vet can' t stop it. ta hai de hen yan zhong, shou yi zhi bu hao |
| [22:22.47] | Is there something you can do? ni you ban fa ma? |
| [22:24.64] | Let me see. wo kan kan |
| [22:26.94] | Let me see. wo kan kan |
| [22:30.64] | Do you think you could get him to eat a bat? ni neng rang ta chi xia bian fu ma? |
| [02:34.-4] | If Joey and I play with matches, we could get you up to an even 100. yào shì qiáo yī hé wǒ wán huǒ chái jiù kě yǐ ràng nǐ lěi jī dào yī bǎi |
| [05:08.-2] | Oh, my God! tiān na |
| [06:27.-4] | ... if you know what I mean. dǒng wǒ de yì sī ba? |
| [06:43.-3] | Why don' t you break up with one of them? hé bù gēn qí zhōng yí gè fēn shǒu? |
| [08:16.-3] | See? You just need the right command. kàn dào le ma? xià duì zhǐ lìng jiù xíng le |
| [08:48.-3] | Joey, put that down. qiáo yī, fàng xià |
| [10:57.-4] | We don' t know if he' ll propose. yě bù zhī dào tā huì bú huì qiú hūn |
| [12:34.-1] | Good deal. hěn hǎo |
| [18:05.-4] | And I feel like I' ve conquered the intellectual world. wǒ yǐ jīng zhēng fú le zhī shi jiè |
| [18:09.-1] | And now I have the most beautiful woman in the world. xiàn zài yòu yōng yǒu shì jiè shang zuì měi dí nǚ rén |
| [18:34.-2] | ... the Ultimate Fighting Champion. zhōng jí gé dòu guàn jūn |
| [00:03.20] | Wouldn' t it be cool if our duck and our chick had a baby? yào shì wǒ men de jī yā shēng xiǎo bǎo bǎo bú shì hěn kù? |
| [00:06.53] | We could call it Chuck. kě yǐ jiào tā chá kè |
| [00:10.31] | Or Dick. huò dí kè |
| [00:15.68] | Listen, I need a favor. wǒ yào qǐng nǐ men bāng máng |
| [00:19.15] | I was in the shower, and as I was... wǒ gāng cái xǐ zǎo, zhèng zài |
| [00:21.82] | ... cleansing myself, I felt something. xǐ shēn tǐ shí, fā xiàn yī jiàn shì |
| [00:25.65] | Was it like a sneeze, only better? hěn xiàng dǎ pēn tì, dàn shì gǎn jué gēng shuǎng? |
| [00:30.76] | No. I mean, like, a thing on my body. bú shì, shì wǒ shēn shàng zhǎng le dōng xī |
| [00:33.73] | Well, what was it? shén me dōng xī? |
| [00:35.16] | Well, I don' t know. It' s kind of in a place that' s not.... bù xiǎo de, tā zhǎng zài wǒ bù néng |
| [00:39.03] | It' s not visually accessible to me. And I was hoping maybe you guys... wǒ kàn bú dào, wǒ xiǎng má fán nǐ men |
| [00:43.34] | ... could help me out. bāng wǒ kàn yī xià |
| [00:47.38] | Come on, you guys! It' s no big deal! bài tuō, yòu méi shén me |
| [00:53.85] | Well, what is it? Is it a mole? shì shén me? shì zhì ma? |
| [00:58.29] | No, it' s too wrinkly to be a mole. bú shì, tài zhòu le, bú shì zhì |
| [01:01.22] | Is it? What, a pimple? nà shi dòu zǐ ma? |
| [01:06.46] | No, it' s... bú shì, tā |
| [01:08.23] | ... fancier than a pimple. bǐ qīng chūn dòu gāo jí |
| [01:10.43] | Ross, just go see a doc Guys, what' s? nǐ jiù qù kàn yī nǐ men zài gàn |
| [01:18.37] | Well, it' s definite. Two more weeks of winter. què dìng le, dōng tiān hái yǒu liǎng xīng qī |
| [01:21.48] | Yeah, right. méi cuò |
| [01:23.58] | The One With Ross' Thing běn jí bō chū:" guǎ rén yǒu jí" |
| [02:14.66] | And this is the coffeehouse. This is where I play my music. zhè shì kā fēi guǎn, wǒ dōu zài zhè lǐ biǎo yǎn |
| [02:18.53] | Good deal. These are my friends. piào liàng tā men shì wǒ de péng yǒu |
| [02:20.84] | People? This is Vince. Vince, the people. gè wèi, zhè shì wén sī wén sī, wǒ de péng yǒu |
| [02:25.91] | Vince is a fireman. wén sī shì xiāo fáng yuán |
| [02:28.64] | Have you ever rescued anyone from a burning building? nǐ cóng rán shāo de dà lóu lǐ jiù guò rén ma? |
| [02:31.38] | Ninetyeight hot saves. Highest on the force. jiǔ shí bā cì, duì shàng dì yī gāo |
| [02:40.05] | Fire safety is not a joke, son. hái zi, bù néng ná huǒ zāi kāi wán xiào |
| [02:44.79] | You' re right. I know. nǐ shuō de duì, wǒ zhī dào |
| [02:47.63] | Look, I gotta go. I' m on call tonight. wǒ yào zǒu le, wǎn shàng yào zhí bān |
| [02:50.06] | See you Saturday. xīng qī liù jiàn |
| [02:54.57] | He' s cute, Pheebs. fēi bǐ, tā hǎo kě ài |
| [02:56.00] | But you just started dating that teacher. dàn nǐ bú shì gāng hé nà gè lǎo shī jiāo wǎng? |
| [02:58.27] | Oh, Jason? jié sēn? |
| [02:59.47] | We' re seeing each other tonight. wǒ men wǎn shàng yào jiàn miàn |
| [03:01.58] | Well, Pheebs? fēi bǐ? |
| [03:03.58] | Two dates in one day? That' s so unlike you. jiǎo tà liǎng tiáo chuán? nǐ bù xiàng zhè zhǒng rén |
| [03:06.41] | I know, I know. I' m, like, playing the field. wǒ yě zhī dào wǒ zài yóu xì rén jiān |
| [03:09.85] | I' m juggling two guys. I' m sowing my wild oats. wǒ zài wán nòng bié rén, gǎo qī niǎn sān |
| [03:14.19] | You know, this kind of, like, oatsowing, fieldplaying juggler. wǒ shì gǎo qī niǎn sān de huā xīn luó bó |
| [03:18.66] | So do they know about each other? tā men zhī dào duì fāng de cún zài ma? |
| [03:21.10] | Does a dog' s lips move when he reads? gǒu gǒu niàn shū shí, zuǐ chún huì dòng ma? |
| [03:27.80] | Okay, no, they don' t know. tā men bù zhī dào |
| [03:31.87] | Hey, guys. gè wèi |
| [03:36.34] | Well? How' d it go at the doctor' s? zěn me yàng? yī shēng zěn me shuō? |
| [03:38.55] | He said there' s definitely nothing to worry about. It' s benign. tā shuō bù yòng dān xīn, shì liáng xìng de |
| [03:42.68] | What is it? He couldn' t even tell me. shì shén me? tā gēn běn shuō bu chū lái |
| [03:45.12] | He said it was just some sort of " skin abnormality." tā zhǐ shuō shì yī zhǒng pí fū yì cháng |
| [03:51.06] | The worse thing is, he said, being unable to identify it... gèng zāo de shì tā shuō, yóu yú wú fǎ biàn rèn |
| [03:54.70] | ... he was reluctant to remove it. tā bù yuàn yì wèi wǒ qiē chú |
| [03:56.83] | You should go to my guy. nǐ yīng gāi qù zhǎo wǒ de yī shēng |
| [03:58.47] | Because when I went in there with my third nipple... wǒ qù zhǎo tā shí |
| [04:02.14] | ... he just lopped it right off. tā zhí jiē jiù bǎ tā gěi qiè le |
| [04:04.54] | So I guess I' m lucky. wǒ mán xìng yùn de |
| [04:06.54] | I mean, not as lucky as people who are born with two nipples. suī rán bǐ bù shǎng tiān shēng liǎng gè de rén |
| [04:11.31] | At least they knew what yours was. You know? Yours had a name. zhì shǎo tā men zhī dào nǐ zhǎng le shén me nǐ de yǒu míng zì |
| [04:16.18] | Maybe they' ll name yours after you. yě xǔ yī xué jiè huì yǐ nǐ wéi míng |
| [04:19.32] | You know? They' d call it " The Ross." bǎ tā jiào zuò" luó sī" |
| [04:22.09] | And then people would be, like, " Oh, he' s got a Ross." dà jiā huì shuō hāi, tā zhǎng le yí gè luó sī |
| [04:27.43] | Yeah, that' d be cool. shì a, zhēn kù |
| [04:31.33] | Pete' s breaking up with me. bǐ tè yào gēn wǒ fēn shǒu |
| [04:33.23] | What? shén me? |
| [04:34.90] | I just checked my messages. wǒ gāng cái tīng liú yán |
| [04:36.77] | He said that when he gets back, " We need to talk." tā shuō děng tā huí lái " wǒ men dé tán yī tán" |
| [04:40.51] | And? Well, that' s it. rán hòu ne? jiù zhè yàng |
| [04:42.21] | People never say," We need to talk," unless it' s something bad. méi yǒu rén huì shuō" wǒ men dé tán yī tán" chú fēi shì huài shì |
| [04:45.85] | That doesn' t necessarily mean he' s breaking up with you. nà bù yí dìng dài biǎo tā yào gēn nǐ fēn shǒu |
| [04:49.28] | Really? zhēn de? |
| [04:50.35] | Maybe he just cheated on you. yě xǔ tā zhǐ shì duì nǐ bù zhōng |
| [04:57.76] | I won' t get rich doing it, but I gotta say, it' s cool... zhè me zuò méi yǒu hǎo chù dàn wǒ hái shì hěn gāo xìng |
| [05:01.46] | ... knowing you' re making a difference in a kid' s life. wǒ gǎi biàn le yí gè hái zi |
| [05:04.57] | That is so great. zhēn hǎo |
| [05:09.77] | Oh, my God! tiān na |
| [05:11.31] | We' d better call the fire department. gǎn kuài tōng zhī xiāo fáng duì |
| [05:14.38] | Well, we don' t need a fireman. bù bì zhǎo xiāo fáng yuán ba |
| [05:16.64] | We need, like, a good mechanic. yīng gāi zhǎo hǎo de hēi shǒu lái |
| [05:20.82] | Here they come! We gotta get out of here! tā men lái le, kuài táo |
| [05:23.82] | Wait. Why? děng yī xià, wèi shí me? |
| [05:24.92] | If I wanted to see a fireman, I' d date one. yào shì wǒ xiǎng kàn xiāo fáng yuán wǒ huì zhǎo xiāo fáng yuán yuē huì |
| [05:30.33] | That' s all it is. A third nipple. zhǐ shì yí gè duō chū lái de |
| [05:32.49] | You know? Just your runofthemill third nipple. hěn pǔ tōng de dì sān ge |
| [05:36.26] | You can take it off. Just slice that baby right off. nǐ kě yǐ bǎ tā qiè diào, zhí jiē qiè diào |
| [05:40.00] | Take your shirt off. Let' s see what we' re dealing with. bǎ shàng yī tuō diào ràng wǒ kàn yī xià |
| [05:45.84] | What are you doing? nǐ zài gàn shén me? |
| [05:48.34] | Just showing you my runofthemill, sliceitrightoff third nipple. ràng nǐ kàn nà gè fēi cháng pǔ tōng kě yǐ zhí jiē qiè diào de |
| [05:53.08] | Well, that' s not a third nipple. zhè bú shì dì sān ge |
| [05:55.85] | First of all, it' s on your ass |
| [05:59.29] | Well, then what is it? bù rán shì shén me? |
| [06:01.29] | Wait a minute. Hold it. děng yī xià |
| [06:05.33] | Jansen, come in here. I' m with Hamilton! zhān sēn, lái yī xià wǒ zài gēn hàn mí dùn jiǎng huà |
| [06:08.36] | He' s good with weird things. Bring him in too. tā duì guài dōng xī hěn zài háng, jiào tā yě lái |
| [06:13.53] | I gotta go water Pete' s plants. wǒ dé qù bāng bǐ tè jiāo huā |
| [06:15.80] | You know what? If he' s gonna break up with me, maybe I won' t water them. nǐ men zhī dào ma? rú guǒ tā xiǎng fēn shǒu, wǒ jiù bù jiāo le |
| [06:20.21] | If he' s gonna break up with you, maybe Joey and I should do it... rú guǒ tā yào fēn shǒu gān cuì ràng qiáo yī hé wǒ qù" jiāo" |
| [06:29.52] | Or... huò zhě |
| [06:31.29] | ... we could go and pee on them. wǒ men kě yǐ qù duì zhuó huā pén sā niào |
| [06:36.29] | I can' t take it, you know. wǒ shòu bù liǎo le |
| [06:38.23] | I' m afraid one of them will catch me with the other. wǒ hǎo pà huì bèi zhuō dào |
| [06:41.30] | It' s making me crazy! wǒ kuài fēng le |
| [06:46.47] | What happened to playing the field? nǐ bú shì zài yóu xì rén jiān? |
| [06:50.00] | It doesn' t feel like playing anymore. xiàn zài bù xiàng yóu xì le |
| [06:52.37] | It' s feels like work. It' s like I' m working in the field. bǐ jiào xiàng gōng zuò wǒ hǎo xiàng zài zuò tián yě diào chá |
| [06:56.48] | So pick one of them. nà jiù xuǎn yí gè |
| [06:58.18] | Which one do you like more? nǐ bǐ jiào xǐ huān nǎ yī ge? |
| [06:59.51] | Vince is great, you know? Because he' s, like, a " guy" guy. wén sī hěn bàng, tā shì nán rén zhōng de nán rén |
| [07:04.19] | He' s just so burly, so very burly. tā hǎo zhuàng, zhēn de hǎo zhuàng |
| [07:09.86] | Okay, good. So there you go. Go with Vince. hǎo, nà jiù xuǎn wén sī ba |
| [07:13.06] | But Jason' s really sensitive. dàn shì jié sēn hǎo gǎn xìng |
| [07:14.90] | Sensitive is important. Pick him. gǎn xìng hěn zhòng yào, xuǎn tā |
| [07:18.33] | Oh, sure. Go with the sissy. shì a, tīng niáng niang qiāng de huà |
| [07:22.37] | Jason is not a sissy. jié sēn cái bù niáng niang qiāng |
| [07:25.17] | I meant Chandler. wǒ shì shuō qián dé |
| [07:37.75] | You know, I have dinner plans. wǒ wǎn shàng yǒu yuē |
| [07:41.72] | Thank you so much for coming on such a short notice. xiè xiè gè wèi lín shí gǎn lái |
| [07:45.53] | Ladies and gentlemen, I' ve been practicing medicine for 23 years... gè wèi xiān shēng nǚ shì wǒ xíng yī 23 nián |
| [07:50.73] | ... and I' m stumped. xiàn zài què bèi nàn dào le |
| [08:04.51] | Okay, this is the den. zhè lǐ shì shū fáng |
| [08:06.08] | All right, check this out. Lights! nǐ men kàn ō dēng guāng |
| [08:09.28] | All right, less lights! Bad lights! shǎo yì diǎn guāng bù hǎo de guāng |
| [08:12.39] | Lights, go away! dēng guāng zǒu kāi |
| [08:19.09] | And the dimmer switch. yě kě yǐ yòng diào de |
| [08:22.46] | For a rich guy, that' s a small TV. tā nà me yǒu qián, diàn shì hái zhēn xiǎo |
| [08:24.83] | That' s the video phone. nà shi shì xùn diàn huà |
| [08:26.63] | But you shouldn' t be here. So don' t touch anything. nǐ men bù néng lái de, suǒ yǐ bú yào luàn pèng |
| [08:30.61] | IKEA, this is comfortable! yí jiā jiā jù, hǎo shū fú |
| [08:34.84] | This place is amazing! zhè lǐ tài gāo jí le |
| [08:37.25] | Oh, God! That' s the nicest kitchen. I know. nà gè chú fáng hǎo bàng wǒ zhī dào |
| [08:40.18] | It' s the nicest kitchen. wǒ shì chǔ de |
| [08:41.68] | The refrigerator told me to have a great day. bīng xiāng hái huì zhù wǒ jīn tiān yú kuài |
| [08:45.82] | Look, a millionaire' s checkbook. nǐ men kàn, bǎi wàn fù wēng de zhī piào bù |
| [08:51.03] | Oh, my God, that' s Pete. Get out! tiān na, shì bǐ tè, kuài chū qù! |
| [08:53.29] | How the hell do you answer a video phone? shì xùn diàn huà yào zěn me jiē? |
| [08:59.20] | I guess that' s how. yuán lái shì zhè yàng |
| [09:01.10] | Monica, how' s it going? mó nī kǎ, nǐ hǎo ma? |
| [09:03.10] | Oh, it' s good. It' s good. hěn hǎo |
| [09:05.54] | Just here, watering the plants. wǒ lái bāng nǐ jiāo huā |
| [09:07.51] | Don' t forget that ficus there by Rachel. bié wàng le ruì qiū páng biān nà yī pén |
| [09:12.38] | Chandler' s on the couch! qián dé zài shā fā shàng |
| [09:15.78] | I see him. You guys are the worst hiders, ever. wǒ kàn dào le, nǐ men hái zhēn bú huì duǒ |
| [09:18.65] | Hi. How you doing? hāi nǐ hǎo ma? |
| [09:23.56] | The other day when you said you needed to talk... nà tiān nǐ shuō yào zhǎo wǒ tán yī tán |
| [09:26.63] | ... just so I know, is it good news or bad news? qǐng wèn shì hǎo xiāo xī hái shì huài xiāo xī? |
| [09:29.56] | It' s good news. It' s definitely good news. hǎo xiāo xī, jué duì shì hǎo xiāo xī |
| [09:32.50] | Hold on a second, I have another call. děng yī xià, yǒu lìng yī tòng diàn huà |
| [09:35.14] | How' s it going? nǐ hǎo ma? |
| [09:37.04] | It' s still me. hái shì wǒ |
| [09:38.54] | I' ve got pictureinpicture here. wǒ zhè lǐ yǒu zi huà miàn |
| [09:42.74] | I' m gonna have to call you back later. wǒ zài huí nǐ diàn huà |
| [09:46.48] | Monica? You. I' m gonna have to call you back. mó nī kǎ? wǒ zài huí nǐ diàn huà |
| [09:49.72] | So I' ll see you soon. gǎi tiān jiàn |
| [09:51.65] | Okay. I love you. I love you. hǎo, wǒ ài nǐ wǒ ài nǐ |
| [09:53.75] | We love you too! wǒ men yě ài nǐ |
| [09:58.63] | Well, it' s good news. It' s good news. shì hǎo xiāo xī, shì hǎo xiāo xī |
| [10:01.00] | What do you think the good news is? Look at this! nǐ xiǎng shì shén me hǎo xiāo xī? nǐ men kàn |
| [10:04.37] | He wrote a check for 50, 000 to " Hugo Lindgren' s Ring Design." tā kāi le yī zhāng wǔ wàn yuán de zhī piào gěi yī wèi jiè zhǐ shè jì shī |
| [10:10.84] | Sorry. What do you think the good news is? duì bù qǐ, nǐ xiǎng shì shén me hǎo xiāo xī? |
| [10:15.71] | Oh, my! tiān na |
| [10:17.08] | Monica' s gonna marry a millionaire! mó nī kǎ yào jià gěi bǎi wàn fù wēng le |
| [10:19.61] | You gotta get Mom on the phone! Call Mom! Call Mom! gǎn kuài dǎ gěi mā, dǎ gěi mā! dǎ gěi mā |
| [10:25.62] | And that' s Pete' s mom. nà shi bǐ tè de mā mā |
| [10:34.03] | You have to make it a theme wedding. And the theme could be: nǐ dé bàn yí gè zhǔ tí hūn lǐ zhǔ tí kě yǐ shì |
| [10:37.80] | " Look How Much Money We' ve Got!" " kàn wǒ men duō yǒu qián a" |
| [10:41.67] | I mean, you could put money in the invitations. nǐ kě yǐ zài xǐ tiě lǐ fàng qián |
| [10:44.77] | You could have, like, littlemoney place settings. nǐ kě yǐ yòng qián zuò chéng cān jù |
| [10:47.61] | And you could start with a money salad. dì yī dào cài kě yǐ shàng chāo piào shā là |
| [10:50.44] | I mean, it' ll be dry, but people will like it. suī rán gàn le diǎn, jué duì shòu huān yíng |
| [10:53.68] | Would you stop? bié zài shuō le |
| [10:55.05] | We' ve only gone out a couple of weeks. wǒ men cái jiāo wǎng liǎng xīng qī |
| [10:58.65] | But this is Pete. He' s not like other people. tā shì bǐ tè, gēn bié rén bù yí yàng |
| [11:01.19] | On your first date, you went to Rome. nǐ men dì yī cì yuē huì jiù qù luó mǎ |
| [11:03.22] | For most guys, that' s like a third or fourth date kind of thing. duì qí tā nán rén lái shuō nà shi dì sān sì cì yuē huì de shì |
| [11:08.50] | Well, if that' s what it is, then it' s crazy. rú guǒ tā yāo qiú hūn, nà jiù tài kuā zhāng le |
| [11:11.73] | Monica' s right. We' re talking about marriage here. mó nī kǎ shuō de duì zhè kě shì hūn yīn dà shì |
| [11:14.70] | She can' t just rush into this. tā bù néng shuō jià jiù jià |
| [11:17.34] | What do you know? You married a lesbian! nǐ dǒng shén me? nǐ qǔ le yí gè nǚ tóng zhì |
| [11:26.15] | I gotta go. I have to break up with Vince. wǒ yào zǒu le, wǒ yào qù gēn wén sī fēn shǒu |
| [11:28.75] | So you' re going with the teacher? nǐ xuǎn le nà gè lǎo shī? |
| [11:31.09] | I like Vince a lot, you know? But Jason is so sensitive. wǒ hěn xǐ huān wén sī, dàn jié sēn hǎo gǎn xìng |
| [11:35.09] | In the long run, I think sensitive is better than having... cháng qī lái shuō, gǎn xìng yīng gāi bǐ |
| [11:38.76] | ... a really, really, really nice body. shēn cái hěn měng lái de hǎo |
| [11:46.07] | Jason. Definitely Jason. jié sēn, jué duì shì jié sēn |
| [11:48.50] | Wish me luck! Good luck! zhù wǒ hǎo yùn zhù nǐ hǎo yùn |
| [11:53.07] | Oh, my God! wàn suì! |
| [11:57.21] | Sorry. duì bù qǐ |
| [11:58.28] | I was imagining what it' d be like to catch the money bouquet. wǒ zài xiǎng xiàng jiē dào chāo piào pěng huā de gǎn jué |
| [12:07.62] | Excuse me. Is Vince here? bào qiàn, wén sī zài ma? |
| [12:10.12] | Oh, sure. zài |
| [12:15.93] | I didn' t know you guys actually used those. wǒ bù xiǎo de nǐ men huì zhēn de huá xià lái |
| [12:19.43] | So what' s up? shén me shì? |
| [12:24.37] | This isn' t gonna be easy. zhè jiàn shì hěn nán qǐ chǐ |
| [12:28.04] | I don' t think we should see each other anymore. wǒ men hái shì bié zài jiàn miàn le |
| [12:36.62] | I' m sorry. duì bù qǐ |
| [12:37.75] | No, it' s okay. méi guān xì |
| [12:39.62] | It' s just that I thought we had something pretty special here. wǒ hái yǐ wéi wǒ men zhī jiān hěn tè bié |
| [12:44.00] | I felt like you were someone I could finally open up to. wǒ zhōng yú zhǎo dào kě yǐ qīng sù de duì xiàng |
| [12:48.30] | There' s so much in me I haven' t shared with you yet. wǒ hái yǒu hǎo duō shì méi gēn nǐ fēn xiǎng |
| [12:51.93] | My God! I didn' t know you were so tiān na, wǒ bù zhī dào nǐ |
| [12:53.93] | I' m sorry. I can' t talk. bào qiàn, wǒ shuō bu chū huà lái le |
| [12:57.77] | I' m gonna go write in my journal. wǒ yào qù xiě rì jì |
| [13:03.58] | Wait! Wait! Wait! děng yī xià |
| [13:05.85] | " zhōng yāng gōng yuán" |
| [13:07.52] | If you wanna take care of that thing, go see my herbal guy. nǐ rú guǒ xiǎng jiě jué nà gè wèn tí jiù qù zhǎo wǒ de yào cǎo shī |
| [13:11.85] | Thanks. But I wanna remove it, not make it savory. xiè le, wǒ shì xiǎng qiē chú bú shì xiǎng zuò chéng xiāng liào |
| [13:17.32] | When girls sleep with guys with weird things on their body... nǚ shēng fà xiàn qíng rén shēn shàng zhǎng le guài dōng xī |
| [13:21.26] | ... they tell their friends about it. dōu huì gēn péng yǒu guǎng bō |
| [13:24.17] | Give me that. ná lái |
| [13:28.47] | Okay, don' t be mad at me, but I couldn' t resist. bié shēng wǒ de qì, wǒ jiù shì rěn bú zhù |
| [13:32.61] | Bride' s Magazines? " xīn niáng zá zhì"? |
| [13:34.04] | I know you said you' d say no if he asked you... wǒ zhī dào nǐ bú huì dā yìng qiú hūn |
| [13:36.88] | ... but how great would you look walking down the aisle... dàn shì chuān zhè tào táng nà kǎi lún zǒu hóng tǎn |
| [13:40.21] | ... in this Donna Karan? huì yǒu duō měi a |
| [13:43.02] | You so would! yí dìng huì hěn měi |
| [13:45.52] | You should get that anyway. bù jié hūn yě yào mǎi |
| [13:49.36] | Well, for clubbing. kě yǐ chuān qù jù lè bù |
| [13:52.06] | It is so weird. hěn qí guài |
| [13:53.56] | I know what I said. But this morning... wǒ shuō guò bú huì dā yìng dàn shì jīn tiān zǎo shàng |
| [13:56.80] | ... I was lying in bed, imagining what it' d be like to say yes. wǒ tǎng zài chuáng shàng xiǎng xiàng shuō" yuàn yì" de gǎn jué |
| [14:03.40] | I know it' s a little sudden, and it' s rushed... wǒ zhī dào yǒu diǎn tū rán, yě hěn cōng cù |
| [14:06.54] | ... and it' s not like me to do something like this. wǒ yě bú shì huì zuò zhè zhǒng shì de rén |
| [14:09.38] | But it doesn' t mean I can' t. Right? dàn wǒ kě yǐ zhè me zuò, duì ba? |
| [14:12.55] | I mean, I' m crazy about Pete. bì jìng wǒ nà me ài bǐ tè |
| [14:14.52] | And I know that we want the same things. wǒ men zhuī qiú tóng yàng de dōng xī |
| [14:17.59] | And when I thought about saying yes... dāng wǒ xiǎng dào shuō" yuàn yì" de gǎn jué |
| [14:20.09] | ... it made me really happy. wǒ jué de hěn kuài lè |
| [14:22.06] | Oh, my God! tiān na |
| [14:25.23] | I know. wǒ zhī dào |
| [14:27.33] | I need more pie. wǒ hái yào pài |
| [14:31.20] | Mon, if you do get married, can I bring two guests? yào shì nǐ zhēn de jié hūn wǒ kě yǐ dài liǎng gè rén qù ma? |
| [14:38.04] | You didn' t break up with that fireman? nǐ méi gēn xiāo fáng yuán fēn shǒu? |
| [14:40.51] | That was my way of telling you. wǒ jiù shì zhè gè yì sī |
| [14:43.18] | Well, it turns out he' s incredibly sensitive. yuán lái tā fēi cháng gǎn xìng |
| [14:45.88] | He keeps a journal and he paints. tā xiě rì jì, hái huà huà |
| [14:48.25] | He even showed me charcoal drawings that he drew of me. tā hái wèi wǒ huà le yī fú tàn bǐ huà |
| [14:51.42] | He' d prefer watercolors, but he has easy access to a lot of charcoal. tā bǐ jiào xiǎng yòng shuǐ cǎi huà dàn shì shǒu biān yǒu hěn duō hēi tàn |
| [14:58.93] | So will you dump Jason? nà nǐ yào shuǎi diào jié sēn ma? |
| [15:00.59] | Yeah, because I have to break up with someone. duì, wǒ zǒng děi gēn qí zhōng yí gè fēn shǒu |
| [15:04.06] | So Jason is sensitive. But now, so is Vince. jié sēn hěn gǎn xìng, dàn wén sī yě shì |
| [15:08.30] | Plus, Vince has the body. You know? ér wén sī yòu yǒu shēn cái |
| [15:10.74] | So.... suǒ yǐ |
| [15:13.77] | It' s really just about the math. zhè shì suàn shù wèn tí |
| [15:24.12] | Come on in. qǐng jìn |
| [15:34.30] | You sounded serious on the phone. nǐ zài diàn huà lǐ de yǔ qì hěn yán sù |
| [15:36.46] | Is anything wrong? chū le shén me shì ma? |
| [15:56.32] | You must be Ross. nǐ yí dìng shì luó sī |
| [16:00.35] | I am Guru Saj. wǒ shì sà jí dà shī |
| [16:04.19] | Listen, I gotta tell you, I' ve never been to a guru before, so.... lǎo shí shuō, wǒ méi zhǎo guò dà shī suǒ yǐ |
| [16:09.26] | Well, relax. fàng qīng sōng |
| [16:10.46] | If it makes you feel any better, I' ve attended... wǒ zài zhōng bù niàn guò hěn hǎo de yī xué yuàn |
| [16:13.30] | ... fine medical schools in Central America. zhè yàng nǐ bǐ jiào ān xīn le ba |
| [16:16.34] | Well, let' s take a look at this skin abnormality of yours. lái kàn kàn nǐ de pí fū yì cháng ba |
| [16:19.94] | Come on, have a seat. qǐng zuò |
| [16:25.85] | As I suspected, it' s a kundus. gēn wǒ xiǎng de yí yàng, shì kūn dù sī |
| [16:31.12] | What' s a " kundus"? shén me shì kūn dù sī? |
| [16:32.45] | I don' t know. What' s a kundus with you? bù xiǎo de, duì nǐ lái shuō shì shén me? |
| [16:40.39] | Please lie down. qǐng pā xià |
| [16:41.86] | I' ve got a salve that ought to shrink that right up. wǒ yǒu yī zhǒng yào gāo kě yǐ ràng tā suō xiǎo |
| [16:45.83] | I guess it' s worth a try. zhí de yī shì |
| [16:47.90] | Sure. We should see results nà dāng rán, xiào guǒ yīng gāi |
| [16:50.24] | Clearly not the way to go! xiǎn rán bù néng zhè me zuò |
| [16:54.04] | What? What? wèi shí me? |
| [16:55.71] | We appear to have angered it. wǒ men sì hū rě huǒ tā le |
| [16:58.35] | We? We angered it? wǒ men rě huǒ tā le? |
| [17:02.55] | I think I see the problem. wǒ kàn dào zhēng jié le |
| [17:05.15] | And I' m afraid we' re gonna have to use a much stronger tool. wǒ men dé dòng yòng gèng yǒu lì de shǒu duàn |
| [17:10.49] | Love. ài |
| [17:13.00] | Oh, God! bài tuō |
| [17:16.16] | There is absolutely no way this is gonna come off... tā jué duì bù kě néng tuō luò |
| [17:20.03] | ... unless you start to.... chú fēi nǐ yòng |
| [17:22.17] | What was that? zěn me le? |
| [17:24.91] | Well, it' s gone. tā diào xià lái le |
| [17:27.84] | How' s that? zěn me huì? |
| [17:29.34] | Got caught in my watch. bèi wǒ de shǒu biǎo guā diào le |
| [17:36.52] | Lights. dēng guāng |
| [17:39.02] | Romantic lights. làng màn de dēng guāng |
| [17:42.22] | Nice. zhēn hǎo |
| [17:44.09] | So there was this thing I wanted to talk to you about. wǒ shuō guò yǒu shì qíng yào gào sù nǐ |
| [17:48.03] | Oh, right. I' d completely forgot about that. duì ō, wǒ dōu wàng le |
| [17:54.54] | I' ve been doing a lot of thinking. wǒ zuì jìn xiǎng le hěn duō |
| [17:57.27] | And I look at my life... wǒ jiǎn tǎo wǒ de rén shēng |
| [18:00.71] | ... and I feel like I' ve conquered the business world. jué de wǒ yǐ jīng zhēng fú le shāng chǎng |
| [18:15.72] | But there' s one thing missing. dàn shì hái yǒu yí gè quē hàn |
| [18:18.76] | What' s that? shén me quē hàn? |
| [18:21.60] | It' s time for me to conquer the physical world. wǒ gāi zhēng fú tǐ yù jiè le |
| [18:31.51] | I wanna become... wǒ xiǎng chéng wéi |
| [18:37.58] | You wanna what? nǐ xiǎng zěn yàng? |
| [18:40.15] | I wanna be the Ultimate Fighting Champion. wǒ xiǎng chéng wéi zhōng jí gé dòu guàn jūn |
| [18:42.48] | It' s the most intense physical competition in the world. nà shi quán shì jiè zuì jī liè de tǐ néng jìng jì |
| [18:45.52] | It' s banned in 49 states. zài sì shí jiǔ zhōu bèi jìn |
| [18:47.62] | What are you talking about? nǐ zài shuō shí mǒ? |
| [18:49.62] | My trainer, Hoshi, is teaching me... wǒ de jiào liàn zhèng zài jiào wǒ |
| [18:51.76] | ... Jeet Kune Do and Brazilian streetfighting. jié quán dào hé bā xī jiē tóu bó jī |
| [18:54.26] | I even had my own octagon training ring designed. wǒ hái qǐng rén shè jì le zhuān yòng de bā jiǎo xùn liàn chǎng |
| [18:57.70] | And I suppose you used a ring designer for that. suǒ yǐ nǐ zhǎo le shè jì shī jiè zhǐ zì tóng quán jī chǎng |
| [19:04.00] | I want you there, in the front row, when I win. wǒ yào nǐ zài zuì qián pái kàn wǒ yíng de shèng lì |
| [19:07.01] | I want you close enough to smell the blood. wǒ yào nǐ jìn dé kě yǐ wén dào xuè xīng wèi |
| [19:11.61] | What do you think? nǐ yì xià rú hé? |
| [19:14.52] | My parents will be so happy. wǒ de fù mǔ huì hěn gāo xìng |
| [19:21.92] | Crazy underwear Creeping up my butt fēng kuáng de nèi kù |
| [19:26.63] | Crazy underwear Always in a rut fēng kuáng de nèi kù, zǒng shì yī chéng bù biàn |
| [19:30.63] | Crazy underwear fēng kuáng de nèi kù |
| [19:36.27] | What is he doing here? tā lái gàn shén me? |
| [19:38.21] | All right, just keep playing. jì xù chàng |
| [19:40.44] | You' ll get through this. You' ll be fine. nǐ huì ān quán guò guān, bú huì yǒu shì |
| [19:52.89] | Okay, thank you. xiè xiè dà jiā |
| [19:55.56] | And as always, no one talk to me after the show. yī zhào guàn lì yǎn chàng wán bú yào gēn wǒ shuō huà |
| [20:04.33] | I was passing by and saw you were playing. wǒ gāng hǎo lù guò, kàn dào nǐ zài biǎo yǎn |
| [20:06.73] | This is cool, seeing you up there. nǐ zài tái shàng de gǎn jué hǎo bàng |
| [20:12.24] | What' s going on here? Who' s this guy? zěn me huí shì? tā shì shuí? |
| [20:15.41] | I don' t know! He just started kissing me. Get him, Vince! wǒ bù zhī dào, tā tū rán pǎo lái qīn wǒ kuài zhuō zhù tā |
| [20:20.88] | What? shén me? |
| [20:23.42] | I' ve been dating both of you. wǒ tóng shí gēn nǐ men jiāo wǎng |
| [20:27.09] | And it' s been really horrible, because it' s been... zhè zhǒng gǎn jué hěn chà, yīn wèi |
| [20:30.42] | ... a lot of fun for me. shí zài hěn guò yǐn |
| [20:35.40] | But I like you both... nǐ men liǎng gè wǒ dōu xǐ huān |
| [20:38.67] | ... and I didn' t know how to choose. wǒ bù zhī dào gāi xuǎn shuí |
| [20:41.17] | So I' m sorry. I' m terrible. I' m a terrible person. duì bù qǐ, wǒ hěn chà jìn wǒ tài chà jìn le |
| [20:46.04] | Relax. It' s okay. I mean.... bié zhè yàng, méi guān xì |
| [20:48.84] | We never said this was exclusive. wǒ men yòu méi shuō zhǐ néng gēn bǐ cǐ jiāo wǎng |
| [20:51.45] | Neither did we. So give yourself a break. wǒ men yě shì, nǐ bié tài zì zé |
| [20:55.18] | Really? zhēn de? |
| [20:57.42] | We haven' t been going out that long. wǒ men jiāo wǎng de shí jiān yòu bù zhǎng |
| [20:59.92] | Come on, we haven' t even slept together yet. shèn zhì hái méi shàng guò chuáng |
| [21:03.36] | You haven' t? nǐ men méi yǒu? |
| [21:07.56] | You have? nǐ men yǒu? |
| [21:08.60] | Well, this is none of my business. zhè shì nǐ men de wèn tí |
| [21:13.70] | I can' t believe this! You slept with him? wǒ zhēn bù gǎn xiāng xìn nǐ gēn tā shàng chuáng le? |
| [21:17.07] | Well, I made you a candlelight dinner in the park. wǒ péi nǐ zài gōng yuán chī guò zhú guāng wǎn cān a |
| [21:21.94] | I' m gonna make this real easy for you. wǒ lái tì nǐ shěng diào yí gè má fán |
| [21:30.82] | That could' ve been really awkward. xìng hǎo méi yǒu tài nán kàn |
| [21:36.29] | You made him a candlelight dinner in the park? nǐ péi tā zài gōng yuán chī zhú guāng wǎn cān? |
| [21:39.73] | Yeah, but I can do that for you. I' m gonna do that for you. wǒ yě kě yǐ péi nǐ chī, wǒ huì péi nǐ chī |
| [21:43.40] | I can' t believe I went out with somebody... wǒ jū rán gēn yí gè |
| [21:46.13] | ... who' d have an open flame in the middle of a wooded area! zài lín mù qū diǎn huǒ de rén jiāo wǎng |
| [21:59.05] | Everything' s gonna be all right. bú huì yǒu shì de |
| [22:02.65] | Okay, Dick? hǎo ma, dí kè? |
| [22:07.22] | Hello. I am Guru Saj. nǐ men hǎo, wǒ shì sà jí dà shī |
| [22:12.66] | He' s a duck, right? Because otherwise... tā shì yā zǐ ba? fǒu zé |
| [22:15.33] | ... this is way out of my league. jiù chāo chū wǒ de néng lì fàn wéi le |
| [22:18.30] | He' s got a really bad cough, and our vet can' t stop it. tā hāi de hěn yán zhòng, shòu yī zhì bù hǎo |
| [22:22.47] | Is there something you can do? nǐ yǒu bàn fǎ ma? |
| [22:24.64] | Let me see. wǒ kàn kàn |
| [22:26.94] | Let me see. wǒ kàn kàn |
| [22:30.64] | Do you think you could get him to eat a bat? nǐ néng ràng tā chī xià biān fú ma? |
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