[09:11.-3] | How was last night with Julio,senorita? |
[09:21.-2] | ...and all of a sudden he stops to write a poem. |
[10:13.-3] | -See you guys. -Bye-bye. |
[11:23.-3] | Congratulations on your first week At your brand-new job |
[12:34.-3] | Why? How? How is he a genius? |
[15:57.-2] | Just like the one in the poem. |
[19:11.-3] | ...this Mark thing is hard for me. |
[20:03.-4] | I gotta get going. |
[22:30.-3] | And you're also bad in bed |
[00:03.92] | -Does everybody hate these shoes? -Yeah. |
[00:06.69] | But nobody will focus on that if you wear that towel-dress. |
[00:12.62] | Tell him. |
[00:13.69] | It's her first day at this new job. You shouldn't start with her. |
[00:18.90] | All right. I suppose I can wait a day. |
[00:22.60] | -What are you doing Friday? -Why? |
[00:24.60] | Come to my weird cousin Albert's bachelor party. |
[00:27.54] | You know,he's the botanist? |
[00:29.57] | Oh,God! |
[00:31.54] | Botanists are such geeks. |
[00:34.88] | Is that a dinosaur tie? |
[00:42.12] | Morning! |
[00:43.46] | Rach,I'm here with the purses! |
[00:47.56] | It must take you forever to find your keys. |
[00:50.73] | Thank you,Pheebs. |
[00:52.33] | You're welcome. Please want the one with the turtles. |
[00:55.67] | No,turtles scare me. I don't need that today. |
[00:59.40] | Honey,just relax. It's gonna be fine. |
[01:02.24] | Why don't I come and take you to lunch? |
[01:05.01] | Thank you! But Mark's taking me out. |
[01:08.65] | Mark? Is that the same Mark that helped you get the job? |
[01:12.65] | It's like a "good luck on your first day" thing. |
[01:15.59] | Is this a lunch box? |
[01:17.79] | No,a purse. And there's a thermos in it. |
[01:22.93] | -So can you make it on Friday? -What? |
[01:25.53] | I think so. Why am I invited to this again? |
[01:28.30] | Apparently,Albert has no friends. |
[01:30.14] | He's excited about the bachelor party. |
[01:32.30] | He's only getting married so he can see a stripper. |
[01:37.38] | A stripper at a bachelor party. That is so cliche. |
[01:41.11] | Why don't you guys get a magician? |
[01:44.48] | If he can open my beer with his butt-cheeks,then all right. |
[01:50.00] | The One With All the Jealousy |
[02:37.10] | She's having lunch with him? Lunch with him? |
[02:40.27] | You should've seen him hug her when she got the job! |
[02:43.31] | And he's really good-looking. |
[02:47.45] | -What am I gonna do? -You don't do anything. |
[02:50.15] | IKeep it inside. Learn how to hide your feelings. |
[02:54.35] | Don't cry out loud. |
[02:59.59] | Guess who has an audition for a Broadway musical? |
[03:02.09] | I wanna say you,but it seems like such an easy answer. |
[03:06.20] | It is me! |
[03:07.27] | It's a musical version of A Tale of Two Cities. |
[03:10.27] | So I think I'm gonna sing "New York,New York"... |
[03:14.01] | ...and "I Left My Heart in San Francisco." |
[03:19.38] | Joey,I don't think you get to pick the cities. |
[03:23.85] | What? |
[03:24.88] | Mr. Dickens gets to pick them. |
[03:28.35] | Who? |
[03:31.22] | I'll get you the Cliff Notes. |
[03:33.46] | The what? |
[03:35.79] | The abridgment. |
[03:40.67] | The what? |
[03:46.57] | Then the style number... |
[03:48.71] | ...the invoice number and the shipping date. |
[03:52.91] | Good. Any questions so far? |
[03:55.55] | What kind of discount do we get? |
[03:58.05] | Twenty percent. |
[03:59.68] | I love this job! |
[04:03.59] | -My first call! -Here,let me. |
[04:06.82] | Rachel Greene's line. May I help you? |
[04:08.83] | Hi,is Rachel there? |
[04:10.36] | -And who may I say is calling? -This is Ross. |
[04:13.57] | Ross of...? |
[04:15.33] | Of "Ross and Rachel." “ |
[04:18.54] | Hi,it's Mark. |
[04:20.54] | -Hey,Mark. |
[04:22.61] | Hold on a second. It's Ross. |
[04:26.51] | Hi,honey. |
[04:28.18] | What's Mark doing answering your phone? |
[04:30.85] | Oh,he's just goofing around. |
[04:32.85] | Oh,that's funny. |
[04:36.92] | Why isn't he goofing around in his own office? |
[04:40.09] | This is his office too. I told you, we're Joanna's two assistants. |
[04:44.80] | Why does Joanna need two assistants? |
[04:46.93] | How lazy is she? |
[04:50.07] | Oh,my God! What did I just do? |
[04:52.44] | I just shipped 3000 bras to Personnel! |
[04:54.87] | I gotta go! Mark,I need you! |
[04:56.77] | Okay! Bye-bye! |
[05:02.28] | I'm sorry,sweetie. I was just trying to |
[05:05.08] | I was dialing another number. |
[05:20.50] | I got changed in 30 seconds so you could be alone with him. |
[05:24.40] | You better go for it. |
[05:25.84] | I'm not going for anything. |
[05:28.11] | Well,if you don't,I will. |
[05:29.81] | Would you please go? |
[05:32.08] | 'Night,Mon. |
[05:35.31] | 'Night,Julio. |
[05:48.13] | Someone left their book here. |
[05:50.83] | Actually,that is mine. |
[05:54.27] | What are you reading? |
[05:55.87] | Flowers of Evil,by Baudelaire. Have you read it? |
[06:00.44] | Have I read it? |
[06:03.51] | No. Are you enjoying it? |
[06:07.05] | I thought I would, but the translation's no good. |
[06:11.15] | You're a poet and you don't know it. |
[06:16.82] | Actually,l.... |
[06:18.86] | I am a poet. |
[06:22.66] | So you do know it. |
[06:29.13] | So what kind of things do you write about? |
[06:33.54] | Things that move me: |
[06:35.84] | The shadow of a tree... |
[06:38.88] | ...a child laughing... |
[06:42.15] | ...or this lip. |
[06:43.92] | Mine? |
[06:45.92] | Right here? |
[06:48.85] | I could write an epic poem about this lip. |
[06:58.83] | How would that go? |
[07:11.34] | Well,it didn't rhyme... |
[07:14.21] | ...but I liked it. |
[07:18.22] | You've got to pick a pocket or two... |
[07:22.55] | ...boys |
[07:24.26] | You've got to pick a pocket... |
[07:27.53] | ... or two |
[07:34.57] | Lovely. |
[07:36.07] | Just lovely. |
[07:37.70] | Really? Thanks. |
[07:39.27] | We definitely want to see you for the callback on Saturday. |
[07:43.21] | Excellent! |
[07:45.04] | I'll be there. |
[07:46.38] | Don't forget to bring your jazz shoes for the dance audition. |
[07:53.89] | My agent said that it wasn't a dancing part. |
[07:57.49] | All the roles gotta dance a little. |
[08:00.56] | But with your dance background, it'll be a piece of cake. |
[08:03.93] | "Three years of modern dance with Twyla Tharp"? |
[08:08.27] | "Five years with the American Ballet Theatre"? |
[08:13.30] | Everybody lies on their resume,okay? |
[08:16.81] | I wasn't one of the Zoom kids either. |
[08:20.24] | Well,can you,like,dance at all? |
[08:22.75] | Yeah,I can dance. You know.... |
[08:37.70] | What is that? |
[08:39.36] | Sure,it looks stupid now. There's no music playing. |
[08:43.70] | I have to get that. But,no,no. |
[08:49.37] | Hi. |
[08:52.01] | Listen,I'm in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. |
[09:00.38] | Let me ask you this. What do you do for the extra hundred? |
[09:05.19] | So would I have to provide the grapes? |
[09:09.46] | Hi. |
[09:13.33] | It was amazing. He's sexy and smart, which makes him even sexier. |
[09:18.24] | Last night we were fooling around... |
[09:24.31] | Get out! I couldn't stop if a meteor hit me. |
[09:30.01] | We have our stripper, a "Miss Crystal Chandelier." |
[09:35.00] | Name a kid that,what do you expect them to grow up to be? |
[09:40.83] | But he forgot to take the poem with him. |
[09:43.76] | I am totally dense about poetry, but I think this is pretty good. |
[09:48.50] | Check it out. |
[09:51.94] | "The Empty Vase. Translucent beauty" “ |
[09:55.21] | To yourself. |
[10:00.71] | You know,that's pretty good. |
[10:02.78] | Yeah,I think so too. Phoebe? |
[10:05.25] | Great! I'm so glad you guys like it! |
[10:07.25] | -I gotta go to work. -I'm not done. |
[10:10.69] | Give it back when you're through. |
[10:15.93] | Oh,my God! Oh,my God! Poor Monica! |
[10:18.43] | What? What? What? |
[10:20.93] | He was with her when he wrote this poem! |
[10:23.40] | "My vessel so lovely, with nothing inside"? |
[10:26.64] | "Now that I've touched you, you seem emptier still"? |
[10:29.64] | He thinks Monica's empty. She's the empty vase! |
[10:33.08] | You really think he meant that? |
[10:35.11] | Totally. |
[10:36.38] | Oh,God! And she seems so happy too. |
[10:39.65] | Done. |
[10:51.50] | Do you have the Ralph Lauren file? |
[10:54.13] | Oh,yeah,sure! It's right |
[11:01.47] | What's that? |
[11:03.41] | It's from Ross. It's a Love Bug. |
[11:07.78] | Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend. |
[11:11.82] | That's not what he's doing. |
[11:13.78] | He's just really romantic. |
[11:16.59] | Excuse me. Are you Rachel Greene? |
[11:21.79] | One,two,three. 1、2、3 |
[11:26.60] | It won't be long Before you're the boss |
[11:29.70] | And you know who will be there To support you |
[11:33.00] | Your one and only boyfriend |
[11:34.61] | It's nice to have a boyfriend! |
[11:36.34] | Your loyal,loving boyfriend,Ross! |
[11:46.85] | I'm hurt! I'm actually hurt... |
[11:49.79] | ...that you'd think I'd send those things out of anything but love. |
[11:53.92] | Hurt! |
[11:56.39] | All right,I get it. You're hurt! |
[11:59.20] | Can't a guy send a barbershop quartet... |
[12:01.63] | ...to his girlfriend's office anymore? |
[12:06.04] | Oh,please! It was so obvious... |
[12:08.91] | ...Iike you were marking your territory. |
[12:11.54] | You might as well have just come in and peed around my desk! |
[12:17.25] | I would never do that. |
[12:21.72] | Look,I know what's going on here. |
[12:24.00] | Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do. |
[12:28.46] | Well,if Mark said that, then Mark's an idiot. |
[12:32.50] | Mark's a genius. |
[12:36.33] | Don't you see what's happening? |
[12:38.17] | Instead of hitting on her now, he's becoming her confidante. |
[12:41.51] | Now he's gonna be the guy she goes to, to complain about you. |
[12:45.01] | What am I gonna do? |
[12:46.34] | Why don't you send her a musical bug? |
[12:48.41] | No,you already did that. |
[12:53.02] | You're gonna have to go there yourself now. |
[12:55.92] | Make a few surprise visits. |
[12:57.66] | I don't know,guys. |
[12:58.82] | Fine,don't do anything. Sit and talk to us. |
[13:01.33] | Meanwhile,she is talking to him about you. |
[13:04.16] | And he's being Mr. Joe Sensitive. |
[13:05.93] | She's thinking,"Maybe he's the guy for me because he understands me." |
[13:10.27] | And before you know it, she's with him. |
[13:12.47] | And you'll be all,"Oh,man!" |
[13:15.81] | And he'll be all,"Yes!" |
[13:19.28] | And us,we'll be like,"Oh,dude!" |
[13:24.38] | And pretty soon you'll be like: |
[13:27.12] | "Hi." |
[13:29.89] | And,"Well,I can't go. Rachel and Mark might be there." |
[13:35.46] | And we'll be like,"Man,get over it! It's been four years!" |
[13:41.37] | He paints quite a picture, doesn't he? |
[13:47.17] | Here's the Shelley Segal stuff for December. |
[13:49.57] | Wait,I've got something for you. |
[13:52.91] | It's okay. Rachel knows. |
[13:54.81] | Yeah,but even so |
[13:57.15] | I can't help it. I'm just crazy about you. |
[14:00.52] | Oh,that is so sweet! |
[14:05.36] | I know I'm Mr. Inappropriate today, but it's just so tough. |
[14:08.69] | I see you walking around, and I want to touch and hold you.... |
[14:12.43] | Come on,no one's around. Just kiss me. |
[14:15.03] | All right,that's it! Get off of her! |
[14:17.43] | What is going on? |
[14:18.77] | What's going on? I'll tell you what's going on! |
[14:28.18] | I have been down in your store for 20 minutes,trying to get a tie. |
[14:34.85] | What do I have to do to get some service? |
[14:39.52] | Hi,Rach. |
[14:50.77] | Joey Tribbiani? |
[14:57.11] | I've got a problem. |
[14:58.71] | I just got a call from my dance captain. |
[15:01.08] | He's having a relationship crisis and can't leave Long lsland. |
[15:04.38] | Does that mean the audition's off? |
[15:06.62] | Seeing as you've got the most experience... |
[15:10.29] | ... I want you to teach these dancers the combination. |
[15:15.49] | What? |
[15:17.09] | Come on,it's easy. You know,it's hand,hand... |
[15:21.17] | ... head,head |
[15:23.10] | ... up,pas de bourree, pas de bourree... |
[15:25.00] | ... big turn here,rond de jambe.... |
[15:27.94] | Slide,step,step... |
[15:30.34] | ...and jazz hands! |
[15:34.91] | So that's,"Steppity-step and jazz hands." |
[15:38.25] | Have fun. |
[15:40.45] | Bye. |
[15:46.92] | What are you wrapping? |
[15:48.76] | Look what I got Julio. |
[15:54.20] | It's a vase. |
[15:58.70] | Not exactly like the one in the poem. |
[16:02.34] | What do you mean? |
[16:03.84] | Remember how you said you were really dense about poetry? |
[16:13.32] | So I'm just an empty vase? |
[16:15.65] | What? |
[16:17.45] | So,I don't read as many important books as you do. |
[16:20.06] | And I don't write trick poems that aren't about what they seem. |
[16:24.73] | And I get excited about stupid stuff... |
[16:27.40] | ...Iike when my People magazine comes... |
[16:30.30] | ...and the new "Hold Everything" catalog. |
[16:32.90] | But that doesn't mean I'm empty. I care about things. Friends and family. |
[16:37.37] | You have no right to judge me! You don't even know me! |
[16:41.91] | The poem is not about you. |
[16:45.25] | What? |
[16:46.38] | "The Empty Vase" is not about you. “ |
[16:49.39] | My baby preciosa.... |
[16:51.66] | You make me so sad that you would think this. |
[16:56.86] | I'm sorry. It's.... |
[16:58.53] | My friend Phoebe said |
[17:00.93] | It's about all women. |
[17:04.60] | Well... |
[17:05.84] | ...all American women. |
[17:09.91] | You feel better now? |
[17:16.91] | All right,let's do it. |
[17:39.10] | What was that? |
[17:41.14] | It's the best I could get out of them. |
[17:45.31] | Well,people! |
[17:47.04] | People,people,people! |
[17:49.65] | Let's try it again. And this time, everybody watch Joey. |
[17:56.05] | Show 'em how it's done. |
[18:03.59] | Count it off,Mack. |
[18:13.60] | |
[18:17.41] | Did you have fun at the bachelor party last night? |
[18:20.34] | Look what I got! See,she's dressed,right? |
[18:23.58] | And then you click it, and uh-oh,she's naked! |
[18:28.79] | And then you click it again and she's dressed. |
[18:31.66] | She's a business woman walking down the street. |
[18:34.19] | She's window shopping, and oh,she's naked! |
[18:48.84] | I'm gonna spend some alone time with the pen. |
[19:00.82] | I'm sorry. I was an idiot. |
[19:04.02] | A big idiot. |
[19:05.62] | A big idiot. |
[19:08.29] | It's just, you have to realize... |
[19:13.33] | Why is it hard? We've been together for almost a year now. |
[19:17.73] | Well,I was with Carol for,like,eight years. |
[19:21.17] | And I lost her. |
[19:24.04] | And now,if it's possible, I think I love you even more. |
[19:27.91] | So it's hard for me to believe I'm not gonna... |
[19:31.01] | ...well,that someone else isn't gonna take you away. |
[19:35.02] | Let it be me. Let it be me! |
[19:43.00] | Honey,that's very sweet. |
[19:46.20] | It just seems to me,though, that if two people love each other... |
[19:50.23] | ...and trust each other, like we do... |
[19:52.90] | ...there's no reason to be jealous. |
[20:04.62] | Bye,Chandler. |
[20:06.78] | This pen's getting kind of boring. Can you pick me up some porn? |
[20:13.72] | Where you going? |
[20:14.89] | I've gotta go pick up Ben for a play-date this afternoon. |
[20:18.36] | |
[20:19.70] | Just this woman I met last night at the party. |
[20:22.47] | There was a woman at? |
[20:26.60] | The stripper? |
[20:30.54] | You have a play-date with a stripper? |
[20:34.21] | Man,I gotta get a kid! |
[20:44.32] | We started talking after she did her thing... |
[20:47.22] | ...and she's got a boy about Ben's age. |
[20:49.63] | So we're gonna take the kids to a Gymboree class. |
[20:53.43] | -ls that okay? -Sure. Is she married? |
[21:03.01] | Are you jealous? |
[21:06.28] | I just don't see why she has to play with you. |
[21:09.31] | I mean,doesn't she have any other stripper-mom friends of her own? |
[21:17.79] | You are totally jealous! |
[21:20.46] | I'm not jealous. |
[21:21.93] | This is about... |
[21:25.53] | ... people feeling certain things... |
[21:28.93] | ...you know,about... |
[21:31.20] | ...strippers. And,you know.... |
[21:34.71] | I love you too. |
[21:36.44] | Bye. |
[21:37.81] | Wait,wait,wait! |
[21:39.38] | What? |
[21:54.02] | Well,there's a kiss he won't forget for a few hours. |
[21:58.66] | Either that or you just turned him on and sent him to a stripper. |
[22:08.37] | Is there a Julio here? |
[22:11.41] | I am Julio. |
[22:14.38] | Mr. Pretentious |
[22:16.58] | You think there's no one finer Your poems are unpublished |
[22:19.88] | And you work in a diner |
[22:21.89] | You're no God's gift to women That's all in your head |
[22:26.89] | You are just a butt-munch |
[22:28.59] | No one likes a butt-munch! |
[09:11.-3] | How was last night with Julio, senorita? |
[09:21.-2] | ... and all of a sudden he stops to write a poem. |
[10:13.-3] | See you guys. Byebye. |
[11:23.-3] | Congratulations on your first week At your brandnew job |
[12:34.-3] | Why? How? How is he a genius? |
[15:57.-2] | Just like the one in the poem. |
[19:11.-3] | ... this Mark thing is hard for me. |
[20:03.-4] | I gotta get going. |
[22:30.-3] | And you' re also bad in bed |
[00:03.92] | Does everybody hate these shoes? Yeah. |
[00:06.69] | But nobody will focus on that if you wear that toweldress. |
[00:12.62] | Tell him. |
[00:13.69] | It' s her first day at this new job. You shouldn' t start with her. |
[00:18.90] | All right. I suppose I can wait a day. |
[00:22.60] | What are you doing Friday? Why? |
[00:24.60] | Come to my weird cousin Albert' s bachelor party. |
[00:27.54] | You know, he' s the botanist? |
[00:29.57] | Oh, God! |
[00:31.54] | Botanists are such geeks. |
[00:34.88] | Is that a dinosaur tie? |
[00:42.12] | Morning! |
[00:43.46] | Rach, I' m here with the purses! |
[00:47.56] | It must take you forever to find your keys. |
[00:50.73] | Thank you, Pheebs. |
[00:52.33] | You' re welcome. Please want the one with the turtles. |
[00:55.67] | No, turtles scare me. I don' t need that today. |
[00:59.40] | Honey, just relax. It' s gonna be fine. |
[01:02.24] | Why don' t I come and take you to lunch? |
[01:05.01] | Thank you! But Mark' s taking me out. |
[01:08.65] | Mark? Is that the same Mark that helped you get the job? |
[01:12.65] | It' s like a " good luck on your first day" thing. |
[01:15.59] | Is this a lunch box? |
[01:17.79] | No, a purse. And there' s a thermos in it. |
[01:22.93] | So can you make it on Friday? What? |
[01:25.53] | I think so. Why am I invited to this again? |
[01:28.30] | Apparently, Albert has no friends. |
[01:30.14] | He' s excited about the bachelor party. |
[01:32.30] | He' s only getting married so he can see a stripper. |
[01:37.38] | A stripper at a bachelor party. That is so cliche. |
[01:41.11] | Why don' t you guys get a magician? |
[01:44.48] | If he can open my beer with his buttcheeks, then all right. |
[01:50.00] | The One With All the Jealousy |
[02:37.10] | She' s having lunch with him? Lunch with him? |
[02:40.27] | You should' ve seen him hug her when she got the job! |
[02:43.31] | And he' s really goodlooking. |
[02:47.45] | What am I gonna do? You don' t do anything. |
[02:50.15] | IKeep it inside. Learn how to hide your feelings. |
[02:54.35] | Don' t cry out loud. |
[02:59.59] | Guess who has an audition for a Broadway musical? |
[03:02.09] | I wanna say you, but it seems like such an easy answer. |
[03:06.20] | It is me! |
[03:07.27] | It' s a musical version of A Tale of Two Cities. |
[03:10.27] | So I think I' m gonna sing " New York, New York"... |
[03:14.01] | ... and " I Left My Heart in San Francisco." |
[03:19.38] | Joey, I don' t think you get to pick the cities. |
[03:23.85] | What? |
[03:24.88] | Mr. Dickens gets to pick them. |
[03:28.35] | Who? |
[03:31.22] | I' ll get you the Cliff Notes. |
[03:33.46] | The what? |
[03:35.79] | The abridgment. |
[03:40.67] | The what? |
[03:46.57] | Then the style number... |
[03:48.71] | ... the invoice number and the shipping date. |
[03:52.91] | Good. Any questions so far? |
[03:55.55] | What kind of discount do we get? |
[03:58.05] | Twenty percent. |
[03:59.68] | I love this job! |
[04:03.59] | My first call! Here, let me. |
[04:06.82] | Rachel Greene' s line. May I help you? |
[04:08.83] | Hi, is Rachel there? |
[04:10.36] | And who may I say is calling? This is Ross. |
[04:13.57] | Ross of...? |
[04:15.33] | Of " Ross and Rachel." " |
[04:18.54] | Hi, it' s Mark. |
[04:20.54] | Hey, Mark. |
[04:22.61] | Hold on a second. It' s Ross. |
[04:26.51] | Hi, honey. |
[04:28.18] | What' s Mark doing answering your phone? |
[04:30.85] | Oh, he' s just goofing around. |
[04:32.85] | Oh, that' s funny. |
[04:36.92] | Why isn' t he goofing around in his own office? |
[04:40.09] | This is his office too. I told you, we' re Joanna' s two assistants. |
[04:44.80] | Why does Joanna need two assistants? |
[04:46.93] | How lazy is she? |
[04:50.07] | Oh, my God! What did I just do? |
[04:52.44] | I just shipped 3000 bras to Personnel! |
[04:54.87] | I gotta go! Mark, I need you! |
[04:56.77] | Okay! Byebye! |
[05:02.28] | I' m sorry, sweetie. I was just trying to |
[05:05.08] | I was dialing another number. |
[05:20.50] | I got changed in 30 seconds so you could be alone with him. |
[05:24.40] | You better go for it. |
[05:25.84] | I' m not going for anything. |
[05:28.11] | Well, if you don' t, I will. |
[05:29.81] | Would you please go? |
[05:32.08] | ' Night, Mon. |
[05:35.31] | ' Night, Julio. |
[05:48.13] | Someone left their book here. |
[05:50.83] | Actually, that is mine. |
[05:54.27] | What are you reading? |
[05:55.87] | Flowers of Evil, by Baudelaire. Have you read it? |
[06:00.44] | Have I read it? |
[06:03.51] | No. Are you enjoying it? |
[06:07.05] | I thought I would, but the translation' s no good. |
[06:11.15] | You' re a poet and you don' t know it. |
[06:16.82] | Actually, l.... |
[06:18.86] | I am a poet. |
[06:22.66] | So you do know it. |
[06:29.13] | So what kind of things do you write about? |
[06:33.54] | Things that move me: |
[06:35.84] | The shadow of a tree... |
[06:38.88] | ... a child laughing... |
[06:42.15] | ... or this lip. |
[06:43.92] | Mine? |
[06:45.92] | Right here? |
[06:48.85] | I could write an epic poem about this lip. |
[06:58.83] | How would that go? |
[07:11.34] | Well, it didn' t rhyme... |
[07:14.21] | ... but I liked it. |
[07:18.22] | You' ve got to pick a pocket or two... |
[07:22.55] | ... boys |
[07:24.26] | You' ve got to pick a pocket... |
[07:27.53] | ... or two |
[07:34.57] | Lovely. |
[07:36.07] | Just lovely. |
[07:37.70] | Really? Thanks. |
[07:39.27] | We definitely want to see you for the callback on Saturday. |
[07:43.21] | Excellent! |
[07:45.04] | I' ll be there. |
[07:46.38] | Don' t forget to bring your jazz shoes for the dance audition. |
[07:53.89] | My agent said that it wasn' t a dancing part. |
[07:57.49] | All the roles gotta dance a little. |
[08:00.56] | But with your dance background, it' ll be a piece of cake. |
[08:03.93] | " Three years of modern dance with Twyla Tharp"? |
[08:08.27] | " Five years with the American Ballet Theatre"? |
[08:13.30] | Everybody lies on their resume, okay? |
[08:16.81] | I wasn' t one of the Zoom kids either. |
[08:20.24] | Well, can you, like, dance at all? |
[08:22.75] | Yeah, I can dance. You know.... |
[08:37.70] | What is that? |
[08:39.36] | Sure, it looks stupid now. There' s no music playing. |
[08:43.70] | I have to get that. But, no, no. |
[08:49.37] | Hi. |
[08:52.01] | Listen, I' m in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. |
[09:00.38] | Let me ask you this. What do you do for the extra hundred? |
[09:05.19] | So would I have to provide the grapes? |
[09:09.46] | Hi. |
[09:13.33] | It was amazing. He' s sexy and smart, which makes him even sexier. |
[09:18.24] | Last night we were fooling around... |
[09:24.31] | Get out! I couldn' t stop if a meteor hit me. |
[09:30.01] | We have our stripper, a " Miss Crystal Chandelier." |
[09:35.00] | Name a kid that, what do you expect them to grow up to be? |
[09:40.83] | But he forgot to take the poem with him. |
[09:43.76] | I am totally dense about poetry, but I think this is pretty good. |
[09:48.50] | Check it out. |
[09:51.94] | " The Empty Vase. Translucent beauty" " |
[09:55.21] | To yourself. |
[10:00.71] | You know, that' s pretty good. |
[10:02.78] | Yeah, I think so too. Phoebe? |
[10:05.25] | Great! I' m so glad you guys like it! |
[10:07.25] | I gotta go to work. I' m not done. |
[10:10.69] | Give it back when you' re through. |
[10:15.93] | Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Poor Monica! |
[10:18.43] | What? What? What? |
[10:20.93] | He was with her when he wrote this poem! |
[10:23.40] | " My vessel so lovely, with nothing inside"? |
[10:26.64] | " Now that I' ve touched you, you seem emptier still"? |
[10:29.64] | He thinks Monica' s empty. She' s the empty vase! |
[10:33.08] | You really think he meant that? |
[10:35.11] | Totally. |
[10:36.38] | Oh, God! And she seems so happy too. |
[10:39.65] | Done. |
[10:51.50] | Do you have the Ralph Lauren file? |
[10:54.13] | Oh, yeah, sure! It' s right |
[11:01.47] | What' s that? |
[11:03.41] | It' s from Ross. It' s a Love Bug. |
[11:07.78] | Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend. |
[11:11.82] | That' s not what he' s doing. |
[11:13.78] | He' s just really romantic. |
[11:16.59] | Excuse me. Are you Rachel Greene? |
[11:21.79] | One, two, three. 1 2 3 |
[11:26.60] | It won' t be long Before you' re the boss |
[11:29.70] | And you know who will be there To support you |
[11:33.00] | Your one and only boyfriend |
[11:34.61] | It' s nice to have a boyfriend! |
[11:36.34] | Your loyal, loving boyfriend, Ross! |
[11:46.85] | I' m hurt! I' m actually hurt... |
[11:49.79] | ... that you' d think I' d send those things out of anything but love. |
[11:53.92] | Hurt! |
[11:56.39] | All right, I get it. You' re hurt! |
[11:59.20] | Can' t a guy send a barbershop quartet... |
[12:01.63] | ... to his girlfriend' s office anymore? |
[12:06.04] | Oh, please! It was so obvious... |
[12:08.91] | ... Iike you were marking your territory. |
[12:11.54] | You might as well have just come in and peed around my desk! |
[12:17.25] | I would never do that. |
[12:21.72] | Look, I know what' s going on here. |
[12:24.00] | Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do. |
[12:28.46] | Well, if Mark said that, then Mark' s an idiot. |
[12:32.50] | Mark' s a genius. |
[12:36.33] | Don' t you see what' s happening? |
[12:38.17] | Instead of hitting on her now, he' s becoming her confidante. |
[12:41.51] | Now he' s gonna be the guy she goes to, to complain about you. |
[12:45.01] | What am I gonna do? |
[12:46.34] | Why don' t you send her a musical bug? |
[12:48.41] | No, you already did that. |
[12:53.02] | You' re gonna have to go there yourself now. |
[12:55.92] | Make a few surprise visits. |
[12:57.66] | I don' t know, guys. |
[12:58.82] | Fine, don' t do anything. Sit and talk to us. |
[13:01.33] | Meanwhile, she is talking to him about you. |
[13:04.16] | And he' s being Mr. Joe Sensitive. |
[13:05.93] | She' s thinking," Maybe he' s the guy for me because he understands me." |
[13:10.27] | And before you know it, she' s with him. |
[13:12.47] | And you' ll be all," Oh, man!" |
[13:15.81] | And he' ll be all," Yes!" |
[13:19.28] | And us, we' ll be like," Oh, dude!" |
[13:24.38] | And pretty soon you' ll be like: |
[13:27.12] | " Hi." |
[13:29.89] | And," Well, I can' t go. Rachel and Mark might be there." |
[13:35.46] | And we' ll be like," Man, get over it! It' s been four years!" |
[13:41.37] | He paints quite a picture, doesn' t he? |
[13:47.17] | Here' s the Shelley Segal stuff for December. |
[13:49.57] | Wait, I' ve got something for you. |
[13:52.91] | It' s okay. Rachel knows. |
[13:54.81] | Yeah, but even so |
[13:57.15] | I can' t help it. I' m just crazy about you. |
[14:00.52] | Oh, that is so sweet! |
[14:05.36] | I know I' m Mr. Inappropriate today, but it' s just so tough. |
[14:08.69] | I see you walking around, and I want to touch and hold you.... |
[14:12.43] | Come on, no one' s around. Just kiss me. |
[14:15.03] | All right, that' s it! Get off of her! |
[14:17.43] | What is going on? |
[14:18.77] | What' s going on? I' ll tell you what' s going on! |
[14:28.18] | I have been down in your store for 20 minutes, trying to get a tie. |
[14:34.85] | What do I have to do to get some service? |
[14:39.52] | Hi, Rach. |
[14:50.77] | Joey Tribbiani? |
[14:57.11] | I' ve got a problem. |
[14:58.71] | I just got a call from my dance captain. |
[15:01.08] | He' s having a relationship crisis and can' t leave Long lsland. |
[15:04.38] | Does that mean the audition' s off? |
[15:06.62] | Seeing as you' ve got the most experience... |
[15:10.29] | ... I want you to teach these dancers the combination. |
[15:15.49] | What? |
[15:17.09] | Come on, it' s easy. You know, it' s hand, hand... |
[15:21.17] | ... head, head |
[15:23.10] | ... up, pas de bourree, pas de bourree... |
[15:25.00] | ... big turn here, rond de jambe.... |
[15:27.94] | Slide, step, step... |
[15:30.34] | ... and jazz hands! |
[15:34.91] | So that' s," Steppitystep and jazz hands." |
[15:38.25] | Have fun. |
[15:40.45] | Bye. |
[15:46.92] | What are you wrapping? |
[15:48.76] | Look what I got Julio. |
[15:54.20] | It' s a vase. |
[15:58.70] | Not exactly like the one in the poem. |
[16:02.34] | What do you mean? |
[16:03.84] | Remember how you said you were really dense about poetry? |
[16:13.32] | So I' m just an empty vase? |
[16:15.65] | What? |
[16:17.45] | So, I don' t read as many important books as you do. |
[16:20.06] | And I don' t write trick poems that aren' t about what they seem. |
[16:24.73] | And I get excited about stupid stuff... |
[16:27.40] | ... Iike when my People magazine comes... |
[16:30.30] | ... and the new " Hold Everything" catalog. |
[16:32.90] | But that doesn' t mean I' m empty. I care about things. Friends and family. |
[16:37.37] | You have no right to judge me! You don' t even know me! |
[16:41.91] | The poem is not about you. |
[16:45.25] | What? |
[16:46.38] | " The Empty Vase" is not about you. " |
[16:49.39] | My baby preciosa.... |
[16:51.66] | You make me so sad that you would think this. |
[16:56.86] | I' m sorry. It' s.... |
[16:58.53] | My friend Phoebe said |
[17:00.93] | It' s about all women. |
[17:04.60] | Well... |
[17:05.84] | ... all American women. |
[17:09.91] | You feel better now? |
[17:16.91] | All right, let' s do it. |
[17:39.10] | What was that? |
[17:41.14] | It' s the best I could get out of them. |
[17:45.31] | Well, people! |
[17:47.04] | People, people, people! |
[17:49.65] | Let' s try it again. And this time, everybody watch Joey. |
[17:56.05] | Show ' em how it' s done. |
[18:03.59] | Count it off, Mack. |
[18:13.60] | |
[18:17.41] | Did you have fun at the bachelor party last night? |
[18:20.34] | Look what I got! See, she' s dressed, right? |
[18:23.58] | And then you click it, and uhoh, she' s naked! |
[18:28.79] | And then you click it again and she' s dressed. |
[18:31.66] | She' s a business woman walking down the street. |
[18:34.19] | She' s window shopping, and oh, she' s naked! |
[18:48.84] | I' m gonna spend some alone time with the pen. |
[19:00.82] | I' m sorry. I was an idiot. |
[19:04.02] | A big idiot. |
[19:05.62] | A big idiot. |
[19:08.29] | It' s just, you have to realize... |
[19:13.33] | Why is it hard? We' ve been together for almost a year now. |
[19:17.73] | Well, I was with Carol for, like, eight years. |
[19:21.17] | And I lost her. |
[19:24.04] | And now, if it' s possible, I think I love you even more. |
[19:27.91] | So it' s hard for me to believe I' m not gonna... |
[19:31.01] | ... well, that someone else isn' t gonna take you away. |
[19:35.02] | Let it be me. Let it be me! |
[19:43.00] | Honey, that' s very sweet. |
[19:46.20] | It just seems to me, though, that if two people love each other... |
[19:50.23] | ... and trust each other, like we do... |
[19:52.90] | ... there' s no reason to be jealous. |
[20:04.62] | Bye, Chandler. |
[20:06.78] | This pen' s getting kind of boring. Can you pick me up some porn? |
[20:13.72] | Where you going? |
[20:14.89] | I' ve gotta go pick up Ben for a playdate this afternoon. |
[20:18.36] | |
[20:19.70] | Just this woman I met last night at the party. |
[20:22.47] | There was a woman at? |
[20:26.60] | The stripper? |
[20:30.54] | You have a playdate with a stripper? |
[20:34.21] | Man, I gotta get a kid! |
[20:44.32] | We started talking after she did her thing... |
[20:47.22] | ... and she' s got a boy about Ben' s age. |
[20:49.63] | So we' re gonna take the kids to a Gymboree class. |
[20:53.43] | ls that okay? Sure. Is she married? |
[21:03.01] | Are you jealous? |
[21:06.28] | I just don' t see why she has to play with you. |
[21:09.31] | I mean, doesn' t she have any other strippermom friends of her own? |
[21:17.79] | You are totally jealous! |
[21:20.46] | I' m not jealous. |
[21:21.93] | This is about... |
[21:25.53] | ... people feeling certain things... |
[21:28.93] | ... you know, about... |
[21:31.20] | ... strippers. And, you know.... |
[21:34.71] | I love you too. |
[21:36.44] | Bye. |
[21:37.81] | Wait, wait, wait! |
[21:39.38] | What? |
[21:54.02] | Well, there' s a kiss he won' t forget for a few hours. |
[21:58.66] | Either that or you just turned him on and sent him to a stripper. |
[22:08.37] | Is there a Julio here? |
[22:11.41] | I am Julio. |
[22:14.38] | Mr. Pretentious |
[22:16.58] | You think there' s no one finer Your poems are unpublished |
[22:19.88] | And you work in a diner |
[22:21.89] | You' re no God' s gift to women That' s all in your head |
[22:26.89] | You are just a buttmunch |
[22:28.59] | No one likes a buttmunch! |
[09:11.-3] | How was last night with Julio, senorita? |
[09:21.-2] | ... and all of a sudden he stops to write a poem. |
[10:13.-3] | See you guys. Byebye. |
[11:23.-3] | Congratulations on your first week At your brandnew job |
[12:34.-3] | Why? How? How is he a genius? |
[15:57.-2] | Just like the one in the poem. |
[19:11.-3] | ... this Mark thing is hard for me. |
[20:03.-4] | I gotta get going. |
[22:30.-3] | And you' re also bad in bed |
[00:03.92] | Does everybody hate these shoes? Yeah. |
[00:06.69] | But nobody will focus on that if you wear that toweldress. |
[00:12.62] | Tell him. |
[00:13.69] | It' s her first day at this new job. You shouldn' t start with her. |
[00:18.90] | All right. I suppose I can wait a day. |
[00:22.60] | What are you doing Friday? Why? |
[00:24.60] | Come to my weird cousin Albert' s bachelor party. |
[00:27.54] | You know, he' s the botanist? |
[00:29.57] | Oh, God! |
[00:31.54] | Botanists are such geeks. |
[00:34.88] | Is that a dinosaur tie? |
[00:42.12] | Morning! |
[00:43.46] | Rach, I' m here with the purses! |
[00:47.56] | It must take you forever to find your keys. |
[00:50.73] | Thank you, Pheebs. |
[00:52.33] | You' re welcome. Please want the one with the turtles. |
[00:55.67] | No, turtles scare me. I don' t need that today. |
[00:59.40] | Honey, just relax. It' s gonna be fine. |
[01:02.24] | Why don' t I come and take you to lunch? |
[01:05.01] | Thank you! But Mark' s taking me out. |
[01:08.65] | Mark? Is that the same Mark that helped you get the job? |
[01:12.65] | It' s like a " good luck on your first day" thing. |
[01:15.59] | Is this a lunch box? |
[01:17.79] | No, a purse. And there' s a thermos in it. |
[01:22.93] | So can you make it on Friday? What? |
[01:25.53] | I think so. Why am I invited to this again? |
[01:28.30] | Apparently, Albert has no friends. |
[01:30.14] | He' s excited about the bachelor party. |
[01:32.30] | He' s only getting married so he can see a stripper. |
[01:37.38] | A stripper at a bachelor party. That is so cliche. |
[01:41.11] | Why don' t you guys get a magician? |
[01:44.48] | If he can open my beer with his buttcheeks, then all right. |
[01:50.00] | The One With All the Jealousy |
[02:37.10] | She' s having lunch with him? Lunch with him? |
[02:40.27] | You should' ve seen him hug her when she got the job! |
[02:43.31] | And he' s really goodlooking. |
[02:47.45] | What am I gonna do? You don' t do anything. |
[02:50.15] | IKeep it inside. Learn how to hide your feelings. |
[02:54.35] | Don' t cry out loud. |
[02:59.59] | Guess who has an audition for a Broadway musical? |
[03:02.09] | I wanna say you, but it seems like such an easy answer. |
[03:06.20] | It is me! |
[03:07.27] | It' s a musical version of A Tale of Two Cities. |
[03:10.27] | So I think I' m gonna sing " New York, New York"... |
[03:14.01] | ... and " I Left My Heart in San Francisco." |
[03:19.38] | Joey, I don' t think you get to pick the cities. |
[03:23.85] | What? |
[03:24.88] | Mr. Dickens gets to pick them. |
[03:28.35] | Who? |
[03:31.22] | I' ll get you the Cliff Notes. |
[03:33.46] | The what? |
[03:35.79] | The abridgment. |
[03:40.67] | The what? |
[03:46.57] | Then the style number... |
[03:48.71] | ... the invoice number and the shipping date. |
[03:52.91] | Good. Any questions so far? |
[03:55.55] | What kind of discount do we get? |
[03:58.05] | Twenty percent. |
[03:59.68] | I love this job! |
[04:03.59] | My first call! Here, let me. |
[04:06.82] | Rachel Greene' s line. May I help you? |
[04:08.83] | Hi, is Rachel there? |
[04:10.36] | And who may I say is calling? This is Ross. |
[04:13.57] | Ross of...? |
[04:15.33] | Of " Ross and Rachel." " |
[04:18.54] | Hi, it' s Mark. |
[04:20.54] | Hey, Mark. |
[04:22.61] | Hold on a second. It' s Ross. |
[04:26.51] | Hi, honey. |
[04:28.18] | What' s Mark doing answering your phone? |
[04:30.85] | Oh, he' s just goofing around. |
[04:32.85] | Oh, that' s funny. |
[04:36.92] | Why isn' t he goofing around in his own office? |
[04:40.09] | This is his office too. I told you, we' re Joanna' s two assistants. |
[04:44.80] | Why does Joanna need two assistants? |
[04:46.93] | How lazy is she? |
[04:50.07] | Oh, my God! What did I just do? |
[04:52.44] | I just shipped 3000 bras to Personnel! |
[04:54.87] | I gotta go! Mark, I need you! |
[04:56.77] | Okay! Byebye! |
[05:02.28] | I' m sorry, sweetie. I was just trying to |
[05:05.08] | I was dialing another number. |
[05:20.50] | I got changed in 30 seconds so you could be alone with him. |
[05:24.40] | You better go for it. |
[05:25.84] | I' m not going for anything. |
[05:28.11] | Well, if you don' t, I will. |
[05:29.81] | Would you please go? |
[05:32.08] | ' Night, Mon. |
[05:35.31] | ' Night, Julio. |
[05:48.13] | Someone left their book here. |
[05:50.83] | Actually, that is mine. |
[05:54.27] | What are you reading? |
[05:55.87] | Flowers of Evil, by Baudelaire. Have you read it? |
[06:00.44] | Have I read it? |
[06:03.51] | No. Are you enjoying it? |
[06:07.05] | I thought I would, but the translation' s no good. |
[06:11.15] | You' re a poet and you don' t know it. |
[06:16.82] | Actually, l.... |
[06:18.86] | I am a poet. |
[06:22.66] | So you do know it. |
[06:29.13] | So what kind of things do you write about? |
[06:33.54] | Things that move me: |
[06:35.84] | The shadow of a tree... |
[06:38.88] | ... a child laughing... |
[06:42.15] | ... or this lip. |
[06:43.92] | Mine? |
[06:45.92] | Right here? |
[06:48.85] | I could write an epic poem about this lip. |
[06:58.83] | How would that go? |
[07:11.34] | Well, it didn' t rhyme... |
[07:14.21] | ... but I liked it. |
[07:18.22] | You' ve got to pick a pocket or two... |
[07:22.55] | ... boys |
[07:24.26] | You' ve got to pick a pocket... |
[07:27.53] | ... or two |
[07:34.57] | Lovely. |
[07:36.07] | Just lovely. |
[07:37.70] | Really? Thanks. |
[07:39.27] | We definitely want to see you for the callback on Saturday. |
[07:43.21] | Excellent! |
[07:45.04] | I' ll be there. |
[07:46.38] | Don' t forget to bring your jazz shoes for the dance audition. |
[07:53.89] | My agent said that it wasn' t a dancing part. |
[07:57.49] | All the roles gotta dance a little. |
[08:00.56] | But with your dance background, it' ll be a piece of cake. |
[08:03.93] | " Three years of modern dance with Twyla Tharp"? |
[08:08.27] | " Five years with the American Ballet Theatre"? |
[08:13.30] | Everybody lies on their resume, okay? |
[08:16.81] | I wasn' t one of the Zoom kids either. |
[08:20.24] | Well, can you, like, dance at all? |
[08:22.75] | Yeah, I can dance. You know.... |
[08:37.70] | What is that? |
[08:39.36] | Sure, it looks stupid now. There' s no music playing. |
[08:43.70] | I have to get that. But, no, no. |
[08:49.37] | Hi. |
[08:52.01] | Listen, I' m in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. |
[09:00.38] | Let me ask you this. What do you do for the extra hundred? |
[09:05.19] | So would I have to provide the grapes? |
[09:09.46] | Hi. |
[09:13.33] | It was amazing. He' s sexy and smart, which makes him even sexier. |
[09:18.24] | Last night we were fooling around... |
[09:24.31] | Get out! I couldn' t stop if a meteor hit me. |
[09:30.01] | We have our stripper, a " Miss Crystal Chandelier." |
[09:35.00] | Name a kid that, what do you expect them to grow up to be? |
[09:40.83] | But he forgot to take the poem with him. |
[09:43.76] | I am totally dense about poetry, but I think this is pretty good. |
[09:48.50] | Check it out. |
[09:51.94] | " The Empty Vase. Translucent beauty" " |
[09:55.21] | To yourself. |
[10:00.71] | You know, that' s pretty good. |
[10:02.78] | Yeah, I think so too. Phoebe? |
[10:05.25] | Great! I' m so glad you guys like it! |
[10:07.25] | I gotta go to work. I' m not done. |
[10:10.69] | Give it back when you' re through. |
[10:15.93] | Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Poor Monica! |
[10:18.43] | What? What? What? |
[10:20.93] | He was with her when he wrote this poem! |
[10:23.40] | " My vessel so lovely, with nothing inside"? |
[10:26.64] | " Now that I' ve touched you, you seem emptier still"? |
[10:29.64] | He thinks Monica' s empty. She' s the empty vase! |
[10:33.08] | You really think he meant that? |
[10:35.11] | Totally. |
[10:36.38] | Oh, God! And she seems so happy too. |
[10:39.65] | Done. |
[10:51.50] | Do you have the Ralph Lauren file? |
[10:54.13] | Oh, yeah, sure! It' s right |
[11:01.47] | What' s that? |
[11:03.41] | It' s from Ross. It' s a Love Bug. |
[11:07.78] | Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend. |
[11:11.82] | That' s not what he' s doing. |
[11:13.78] | He' s just really romantic. |
[11:16.59] | Excuse me. Are you Rachel Greene? |
[11:21.79] | One, two, three. 1 2 3 |
[11:26.60] | It won' t be long Before you' re the boss |
[11:29.70] | And you know who will be there To support you |
[11:33.00] | Your one and only boyfriend |
[11:34.61] | It' s nice to have a boyfriend! |
[11:36.34] | Your loyal, loving boyfriend, Ross! |
[11:46.85] | I' m hurt! I' m actually hurt... |
[11:49.79] | ... that you' d think I' d send those things out of anything but love. |
[11:53.92] | Hurt! |
[11:56.39] | All right, I get it. You' re hurt! |
[11:59.20] | Can' t a guy send a barbershop quartet... |
[12:01.63] | ... to his girlfriend' s office anymore? |
[12:06.04] | Oh, please! It was so obvious... |
[12:08.91] | ... Iike you were marking your territory. |
[12:11.54] | You might as well have just come in and peed around my desk! |
[12:17.25] | I would never do that. |
[12:21.72] | Look, I know what' s going on here. |
[12:24.00] | Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do. |
[12:28.46] | Well, if Mark said that, then Mark' s an idiot. |
[12:32.50] | Mark' s a genius. |
[12:36.33] | Don' t you see what' s happening? |
[12:38.17] | Instead of hitting on her now, he' s becoming her confidante. |
[12:41.51] | Now he' s gonna be the guy she goes to, to complain about you. |
[12:45.01] | What am I gonna do? |
[12:46.34] | Why don' t you send her a musical bug? |
[12:48.41] | No, you already did that. |
[12:53.02] | You' re gonna have to go there yourself now. |
[12:55.92] | Make a few surprise visits. |
[12:57.66] | I don' t know, guys. |
[12:58.82] | Fine, don' t do anything. Sit and talk to us. |
[13:01.33] | Meanwhile, she is talking to him about you. |
[13:04.16] | And he' s being Mr. Joe Sensitive. |
[13:05.93] | She' s thinking," Maybe he' s the guy for me because he understands me." |
[13:10.27] | And before you know it, she' s with him. |
[13:12.47] | And you' ll be all," Oh, man!" |
[13:15.81] | And he' ll be all," Yes!" |
[13:19.28] | And us, we' ll be like," Oh, dude!" |
[13:24.38] | And pretty soon you' ll be like: |
[13:27.12] | " Hi." |
[13:29.89] | And," Well, I can' t go. Rachel and Mark might be there." |
[13:35.46] | And we' ll be like," Man, get over it! It' s been four years!" |
[13:41.37] | He paints quite a picture, doesn' t he? |
[13:47.17] | Here' s the Shelley Segal stuff for December. |
[13:49.57] | Wait, I' ve got something for you. |
[13:52.91] | It' s okay. Rachel knows. |
[13:54.81] | Yeah, but even so |
[13:57.15] | I can' t help it. I' m just crazy about you. |
[14:00.52] | Oh, that is so sweet! |
[14:05.36] | I know I' m Mr. Inappropriate today, but it' s just so tough. |
[14:08.69] | I see you walking around, and I want to touch and hold you.... |
[14:12.43] | Come on, no one' s around. Just kiss me. |
[14:15.03] | All right, that' s it! Get off of her! |
[14:17.43] | What is going on? |
[14:18.77] | What' s going on? I' ll tell you what' s going on! |
[14:28.18] | I have been down in your store for 20 minutes, trying to get a tie. |
[14:34.85] | What do I have to do to get some service? |
[14:39.52] | Hi, Rach. |
[14:50.77] | Joey Tribbiani? |
[14:57.11] | I' ve got a problem. |
[14:58.71] | I just got a call from my dance captain. |
[15:01.08] | He' s having a relationship crisis and can' t leave Long lsland. |
[15:04.38] | Does that mean the audition' s off? |
[15:06.62] | Seeing as you' ve got the most experience... |
[15:10.29] | ... I want you to teach these dancers the combination. |
[15:15.49] | What? |
[15:17.09] | Come on, it' s easy. You know, it' s hand, hand... |
[15:21.17] | ... head, head |
[15:23.10] | ... up, pas de bourree, pas de bourree... |
[15:25.00] | ... big turn here, rond de jambe.... |
[15:27.94] | Slide, step, step... |
[15:30.34] | ... and jazz hands! |
[15:34.91] | So that' s," Steppitystep and jazz hands." |
[15:38.25] | Have fun. |
[15:40.45] | Bye. |
[15:46.92] | What are you wrapping? |
[15:48.76] | Look what I got Julio. |
[15:54.20] | It' s a vase. |
[15:58.70] | Not exactly like the one in the poem. |
[16:02.34] | What do you mean? |
[16:03.84] | Remember how you said you were really dense about poetry? |
[16:13.32] | So I' m just an empty vase? |
[16:15.65] | What? |
[16:17.45] | So, I don' t read as many important books as you do. |
[16:20.06] | And I don' t write trick poems that aren' t about what they seem. |
[16:24.73] | And I get excited about stupid stuff... |
[16:27.40] | ... Iike when my People magazine comes... |
[16:30.30] | ... and the new " Hold Everything" catalog. |
[16:32.90] | But that doesn' t mean I' m empty. I care about things. Friends and family. |
[16:37.37] | You have no right to judge me! You don' t even know me! |
[16:41.91] | The poem is not about you. |
[16:45.25] | What? |
[16:46.38] | " The Empty Vase" is not about you. " |
[16:49.39] | My baby preciosa.... |
[16:51.66] | You make me so sad that you would think this. |
[16:56.86] | I' m sorry. It' s.... |
[16:58.53] | My friend Phoebe said |
[17:00.93] | It' s about all women. |
[17:04.60] | Well... |
[17:05.84] | ... all American women. |
[17:09.91] | You feel better now? |
[17:16.91] | All right, let' s do it. |
[17:39.10] | What was that? |
[17:41.14] | It' s the best I could get out of them. |
[17:45.31] | Well, people! |
[17:47.04] | People, people, people! |
[17:49.65] | Let' s try it again. And this time, everybody watch Joey. |
[17:56.05] | Show ' em how it' s done. |
[18:03.59] | Count it off, Mack. |
[18:13.60] | |
[18:17.41] | Did you have fun at the bachelor party last night? |
[18:20.34] | Look what I got! See, she' s dressed, right? |
[18:23.58] | And then you click it, and uhoh, she' s naked! |
[18:28.79] | And then you click it again and she' s dressed. |
[18:31.66] | She' s a business woman walking down the street. |
[18:34.19] | She' s window shopping, and oh, she' s naked! |
[18:48.84] | I' m gonna spend some alone time with the pen. |
[19:00.82] | I' m sorry. I was an idiot. |
[19:04.02] | A big idiot. |
[19:05.62] | A big idiot. |
[19:08.29] | It' s just, you have to realize... |
[19:13.33] | Why is it hard? We' ve been together for almost a year now. |
[19:17.73] | Well, I was with Carol for, like, eight years. |
[19:21.17] | And I lost her. |
[19:24.04] | And now, if it' s possible, I think I love you even more. |
[19:27.91] | So it' s hard for me to believe I' m not gonna... |
[19:31.01] | ... well, that someone else isn' t gonna take you away. |
[19:35.02] | Let it be me. Let it be me! |
[19:43.00] | Honey, that' s very sweet. |
[19:46.20] | It just seems to me, though, that if two people love each other... |
[19:50.23] | ... and trust each other, like we do... |
[19:52.90] | ... there' s no reason to be jealous. |
[20:04.62] | Bye, Chandler. |
[20:06.78] | This pen' s getting kind of boring. Can you pick me up some porn? |
[20:13.72] | Where you going? |
[20:14.89] | I' ve gotta go pick up Ben for a playdate this afternoon. |
[20:18.36] | |
[20:19.70] | Just this woman I met last night at the party. |
[20:22.47] | There was a woman at? |
[20:26.60] | The stripper? |
[20:30.54] | You have a playdate with a stripper? |
[20:34.21] | Man, I gotta get a kid! |
[20:44.32] | We started talking after she did her thing... |
[20:47.22] | ... and she' s got a boy about Ben' s age. |
[20:49.63] | So we' re gonna take the kids to a Gymboree class. |
[20:53.43] | ls that okay? Sure. Is she married? |
[21:03.01] | Are you jealous? |
[21:06.28] | I just don' t see why she has to play with you. |
[21:09.31] | I mean, doesn' t she have any other strippermom friends of her own? |
[21:17.79] | You are totally jealous! |
[21:20.46] | I' m not jealous. |
[21:21.93] | This is about... |
[21:25.53] | ... people feeling certain things... |
[21:28.93] | ... you know, about... |
[21:31.20] | ... strippers. And, you know.... |
[21:34.71] | I love you too. |
[21:36.44] | Bye. |
[21:37.81] | Wait, wait, wait! |
[21:39.38] | What? |
[21:54.02] | Well, there' s a kiss he won' t forget for a few hours. |
[21:58.66] | Either that or you just turned him on and sent him to a stripper. |
[22:08.37] | Is there a Julio here? |
[22:11.41] | I am Julio. |
[22:14.38] | Mr. Pretentious |
[22:16.58] | You think there' s no one finer Your poems are unpublished |
[22:19.88] | And you work in a diner |
[22:21.89] | You' re no God' s gift to women That' s all in your head |
[22:26.89] | You are just a buttmunch |
[22:28.59] | No one likes a buttmunch! |