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[ti:rock n roll nerd] |
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[ar:Tim Minchin] |
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He doesn't have a problem with drugs |
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He just doesn't get them |
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He's fine that his mates have tattoos |
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But he thinks they'll regret them |
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He likes going to pubs |
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But he hates it when the music's too loud |
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He tends not to go to rock concerts |
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Cos he can't stand the crowd |
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But all he's ever wanted to be |
| [00:26.570] |
Is a rock star on MTV |
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But he knows that it's not f*cking likely |
| [00:33.300] |
He's in his mid thirtieth |
| [00:35.290] |
He knows that he will always be |
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A rock 'n' roll nerd |
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He'll keep writing songs the world will never hear |
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And though they won't be heard |
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He'll just keep writing |
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Oh yeah |
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But you see the problem is |
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He always dreamt of being a star |
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But he learned piano instead of guitar |
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Which in the nineties didn't get you very far |
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So while all the other kids were learning Stairway |
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He was the piano to their forte |
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But he was convinced one day |
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He'd rock their fucking asses |
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And be an icon for the disenfranchised masses |
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And grow his hair long |
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And rebel against the state |
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But just for now that'd have to wait |
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Cos he's running late for his morning classes |
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And he will always be |
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A rock 'n' roll nerd |
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He'll keep playing gigs that no one knows about |
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And though it sounds absurd |
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He'll just keep playing |
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Oh yeah |
| [01:51.340] |
But you see the problem is |
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There's not much depth in what he's singing |
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He's a victim of his happy middle class upbringing |
| [02:01.640] |
So he can't write about the hood |
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Or bling bling |
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So he sits and imagines his girlfriend is dead |
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To try and invoke some angst in his middle class head |
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But the bitch is always fine at half past nine |
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When they go to bed |
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And he's not spent a single night in prison |
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He has no issues with nutrition |
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He has no drinking problem |
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And no drug addiction |
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Unless you count the drugs they put in chicken |
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And marijuana always tends to make him cough |
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He doesn't look good with his t-shirt off |
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And when he tries to act tough you can tell he's trickin' |
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While his mates all go out late |
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Popping pills and having fun |
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He goes home and showers |
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And gets a good eight hours |
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He gets his thrills from his morning run |
| [03:02.460] |
And while his mates all go on dates |
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Taking speed and drinking cans of Jim Beam |
| [03:07.780] |
He stays home and cooks |
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Curls up with a book |
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With the girl he's had since he was seventeen |
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Cos he's never really been part of the scene |
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Give him guns 'n' roses, he'll take Queen |
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He's more into Beatles than The Stones |
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He's more Stevie Wonder than Ramones |
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And he's never owned a transit van |
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He's never shot a Panterra fan |
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He doesn't know the difference between metal and thrash |
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He couldn't tell you nothing about Axl and Slash |
| [03:33.990] |
He likes Ben Folds to the Jackson Five |
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He knows all the words to Staying Alive |
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And though he tries to be all grungy and cool |
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He spent eleven years in a motherf*cking private school |
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So it don't matter how he tries |
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He cannot hide behind his rock 'n' roll lies |
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Cos you've either got it or you don't |
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You'll either rock it or you won't |
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Yeah, you've either got it or you don't |
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Yeah, you'll either rock it or you won't |
| [04:03.590] |
Yeah, you've either got it or you don't |
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Either rock it or you won't |
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You've either got it or you got it or you |
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either rock it or you won't |
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Yeah, you'll either rock it or you won't |
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He knows that his music lacks depth |
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But it just can't be helped |
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He has nothing interesting to say |
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So he writes about himself |
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But he doesn't want to see himself obsessed |
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So he writes in third person |
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In an attempt to seem more rock 'n' roll |
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But he suspects it's not workin' |
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And deep in his heart he knows he |
| [05:23.540] |
That he'll never be Bono or Bowie |
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And even if he was quite pretty |
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With small pants like Kylie |
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He knows that he |
| [05:35.990] |
Will always be |
| [05:40.910] |
A rock 'n' roll nerd |
| [05:43.910] |
He'll keep writing songs the world don't care about |
| [05:48.070] |
And though it sounds absurd |
| [05:50.460] |
He'll just keep writing |
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Oh yeah |
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You can criticise him |
| [05:59.480] |
But he won't care |
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Cos he wants to rock, and he will never be deterred |
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But he'll always be a fucked up little, |
| [06:13.360] |
try-hard, wannabe rock 'n' roll nerd |