| [09:11.-3] |
How was last night with Julio, senorita? |
| [09:21.-2] |
... and all of a sudden he stops to write a poem. |
| [10:13.-3] |
See you guys. Byebye. |
| [11:23.-3] |
Congratulations on your first week At your brandnew job |
| [12:34.-3] |
Why? How? How is he a genius? |
| [15:57.-2] |
Just like the one in the poem. |
| [19:11.-3] |
... this Mark thing is hard for me. |
| [20:03.-4] |
I gotta get going. |
| [22:30.-3] |
And you' re also bad in bed |
| [00:03.92] |
Does everybody hate these shoes? Yeah. |
| [00:06.69] |
But nobody will focus on that if you wear that toweldress. |
| [00:12.62] |
Tell him. |
| [00:13.69] |
It' s her first day at this new job. You shouldn' t start with her. |
| [00:18.90] |
All right. I suppose I can wait a day. |
| [00:22.60] |
What are you doing Friday? Why? |
| [00:24.60] |
Come to my weird cousin Albert' s bachelor party. |
| [00:27.54] |
You know, he' s the botanist? |
| [00:29.57] |
Oh, God! |
| [00:31.54] |
Botanists are such geeks. |
| [00:34.88] |
Is that a dinosaur tie? |
| [00:42.12] |
Morning! |
| [00:43.46] |
Rach, I' m here with the purses! |
| [00:47.56] |
It must take you forever to find your keys. |
| [00:50.73] |
Thank you, Pheebs. |
| [00:52.33] |
You' re welcome. Please want the one with the turtles. |
| [00:55.67] |
No, turtles scare me. I don' t need that today. |
| [00:59.40] |
Honey, just relax. It' s gonna be fine. |
| [01:02.24] |
Why don' t I come and take you to lunch? |
| [01:05.01] |
Thank you! But Mark' s taking me out. |
| [01:08.65] |
Mark? Is that the same Mark that helped you get the job? |
| [01:12.65] |
It' s like a " good luck on your first day" thing. |
| [01:15.59] |
Is this a lunch box? |
| [01:17.79] |
No, a purse. And there' s a thermos in it. |
| [01:22.93] |
So can you make it on Friday? What? |
| [01:25.53] |
I think so. Why am I invited to this again? |
| [01:28.30] |
Apparently, Albert has no friends. |
| [01:30.14] |
He' s excited about the bachelor party. |
| [01:32.30] |
He' s only getting married so he can see a stripper. |
| [01:37.38] |
A stripper at a bachelor party. That is so cliche. |
| [01:41.11] |
Why don' t you guys get a magician? |
| [01:44.48] |
If he can open my beer with his buttcheeks, then all right. |
| [01:50.00] |
The One With All the Jealousy |
| [02:37.10] |
She' s having lunch with him? Lunch with him? |
| [02:40.27] |
You should' ve seen him hug her when she got the job! |
| [02:43.31] |
And he' s really goodlooking. |
| [02:47.45] |
What am I gonna do? You don' t do anything. |
| [02:50.15] |
IKeep it inside. Learn how to hide your feelings. |
| [02:54.35] |
Don' t cry out loud. |
| [02:59.59] |
Guess who has an audition for a Broadway musical? |
| [03:02.09] |
I wanna say you, but it seems like such an easy answer. |
| [03:06.20] |
It is me! |
| [03:07.27] |
It' s a musical version of A Tale of Two Cities. |
| [03:10.27] |
So I think I' m gonna sing " New York, New York"... |
| [03:14.01] |
... and " I Left My Heart in San Francisco." |
| [03:19.38] |
Joey, I don' t think you get to pick the cities. |
| [03:23.85] |
What? |
| [03:24.88] |
Mr. Dickens gets to pick them. |
| [03:28.35] |
Who? |
| [03:31.22] |
I' ll get you the Cliff Notes. |
| [03:33.46] |
The what? |
| [03:35.79] |
The abridgment. |
| [03:40.67] |
The what? |
| [03:46.57] |
Then the style number... |
| [03:48.71] |
... the invoice number and the shipping date. |
| [03:52.91] |
Good. Any questions so far? |
| [03:55.55] |
What kind of discount do we get? |
| [03:58.05] |
Twenty percent. |
| [03:59.68] |
I love this job! |
| [04:03.59] |
My first call! Here, let me. |
| [04:06.82] |
Rachel Greene' s line. May I help you? |
| [04:08.83] |
Hi, is Rachel there? |
| [04:10.36] |
And who may I say is calling? This is Ross. |
| [04:13.57] |
Ross of...? |
| [04:15.33] |
Of " Ross and Rachel." " |
| [04:18.54] |
Hi, it' s Mark. |
| [04:20.54] |
Hey, Mark. |
| [04:22.61] |
Hold on a second. It' s Ross. |
| [04:26.51] |
Hi, honey. |
| [04:28.18] |
What' s Mark doing answering your phone? |
| [04:30.85] |
Oh, he' s just goofing around. |
| [04:32.85] |
Oh, that' s funny. |
| [04:36.92] |
Why isn' t he goofing around in his own office? |
| [04:40.09] |
This is his office too. I told you, we' re Joanna' s two assistants. |
| [04:44.80] |
Why does Joanna need two assistants? |
| [04:46.93] |
How lazy is she? |
| [04:50.07] |
Oh, my God! What did I just do? |
| [04:52.44] |
I just shipped 3000 bras to Personnel! |
| [04:54.87] |
I gotta go! Mark, I need you! |
| [04:56.77] |
Okay! Byebye! |
| [05:02.28] |
I' m sorry, sweetie. I was just trying to |
| [05:05.08] |
I was dialing another number. |
| [05:20.50] |
I got changed in 30 seconds so you could be alone with him. |
| [05:24.40] |
You better go for it. |
| [05:25.84] |
I' m not going for anything. |
| [05:28.11] |
Well, if you don' t, I will. |
| [05:29.81] |
Would you please go? |
| [05:32.08] |
' Night, Mon. |
| [05:35.31] |
' Night, Julio. |
| [05:48.13] |
Someone left their book here. |
| [05:50.83] |
Actually, that is mine. |
| [05:54.27] |
What are you reading? |
| [05:55.87] |
Flowers of Evil, by Baudelaire. Have you read it? |
| [06:00.44] |
Have I read it? |
| [06:03.51] |
No. Are you enjoying it? |
| [06:07.05] |
I thought I would, but the translation' s no good. |
| [06:11.15] |
You' re a poet and you don' t know it. |
| [06:16.82] |
Actually, l.... |
| [06:18.86] |
I am a poet. |
| [06:22.66] |
So you do know it. |
| [06:29.13] |
So what kind of things do you write about? |
| [06:33.54] |
Things that move me: |
| [06:35.84] |
The shadow of a tree... |
| [06:38.88] |
... a child laughing... |
| [06:42.15] |
... or this lip. |
| [06:43.92] |
Mine? |
| [06:45.92] |
Right here? |
| [06:48.85] |
I could write an epic poem about this lip. |
| [06:58.83] |
How would that go? |
| [07:11.34] |
Well, it didn' t rhyme... |
| [07:14.21] |
... but I liked it. |
| [07:18.22] |
You' ve got to pick a pocket or two... |
| [07:22.55] |
... boys |
| [07:24.26] |
You' ve got to pick a pocket... |
| [07:27.53] |
... or two |
| [07:34.57] |
Lovely. |
| [07:36.07] |
Just lovely. |
| [07:37.70] |
Really? Thanks. |
| [07:39.27] |
We definitely want to see you for the callback on Saturday. |
| [07:43.21] |
Excellent! |
| [07:45.04] |
I' ll be there. |
| [07:46.38] |
Don' t forget to bring your jazz shoes for the dance audition. |
| [07:53.89] |
My agent said that it wasn' t a dancing part. |
| [07:57.49] |
All the roles gotta dance a little. |
| [08:00.56] |
But with your dance background, it' ll be a piece of cake. |
| [08:03.93] |
" Three years of modern dance with Twyla Tharp"? |
| [08:08.27] |
" Five years with the American Ballet Theatre"? |
| [08:13.30] |
Everybody lies on their resume, okay? |
| [08:16.81] |
I wasn' t one of the Zoom kids either. |
| [08:20.24] |
Well, can you, like, dance at all? |
| [08:22.75] |
Yeah, I can dance. You know.... |
| [08:37.70] |
What is that? |
| [08:39.36] |
Sure, it looks stupid now. There' s no music playing. |
| [08:43.70] |
I have to get that. But, no, no. |
| [08:49.37] |
Hi. |
| [08:52.01] |
Listen, I' m in need of a stripper and I was told that you do that. |
| [09:00.38] |
Let me ask you this. What do you do for the extra hundred? |
| [09:05.19] |
So would I have to provide the grapes? |
| [09:09.46] |
Hi. |
| [09:13.33] |
It was amazing. He' s sexy and smart, which makes him even sexier. |
| [09:18.24] |
Last night we were fooling around... |
| [09:24.31] |
Get out! I couldn' t stop if a meteor hit me. |
| [09:30.01] |
We have our stripper, a " Miss Crystal Chandelier." |
| [09:35.00] |
Name a kid that, what do you expect them to grow up to be? |
| [09:40.83] |
But he forgot to take the poem with him. |
| [09:43.76] |
I am totally dense about poetry, but I think this is pretty good. |
| [09:48.50] |
Check it out. |
| [09:51.94] |
" The Empty Vase. Translucent beauty" " |
| [09:55.21] |
To yourself. |
| [10:00.71] |
You know, that' s pretty good. |
| [10:02.78] |
Yeah, I think so too. Phoebe? |
| [10:05.25] |
Great! I' m so glad you guys like it! |
| [10:07.25] |
I gotta go to work. I' m not done. |
| [10:10.69] |
Give it back when you' re through. |
| [10:15.93] |
Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Poor Monica! |
| [10:18.43] |
What? What? What? |
| [10:20.93] |
He was with her when he wrote this poem! |
| [10:23.40] |
" My vessel so lovely, with nothing inside"? |
| [10:26.64] |
" Now that I' ve touched you, you seem emptier still"? |
| [10:29.64] |
He thinks Monica' s empty. She' s the empty vase! |
| [10:33.08] |
You really think he meant that? |
| [10:35.11] |
Totally. |
| [10:36.38] |
Oh, God! And she seems so happy too. |
| [10:39.65] |
Done. |
| [10:51.50] |
Do you have the Ralph Lauren file? |
| [10:54.13] |
Oh, yeah, sure! It' s right |
| [11:01.47] |
What' s that? |
| [11:03.41] |
It' s from Ross. It' s a Love Bug. |
| [11:07.78] |
Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend. |
| [11:11.82] |
That' s not what he' s doing. |
| [11:13.78] |
He' s just really romantic. |
| [11:16.59] |
Excuse me. Are you Rachel Greene? |
| [11:21.79] |
One, two, three. 1 2 3 |
| [11:26.60] |
It won' t be long Before you' re the boss |
| [11:29.70] |
And you know who will be there To support you |
| [11:33.00] |
Your one and only boyfriend |
| [11:34.61] |
It' s nice to have a boyfriend! |
| [11:36.34] |
Your loyal, loving boyfriend, Ross! |
| [11:46.85] |
I' m hurt! I' m actually hurt... |
| [11:49.79] |
... that you' d think I' d send those things out of anything but love. |
| [11:53.92] |
Hurt! |
| [11:56.39] |
All right, I get it. You' re hurt! |
| [11:59.20] |
Can' t a guy send a barbershop quartet... |
| [12:01.63] |
... to his girlfriend' s office anymore? |
| [12:06.04] |
Oh, please! It was so obvious... |
| [12:08.91] |
... Iike you were marking your territory. |
| [12:11.54] |
You might as well have just come in and peed around my desk! |
| [12:17.25] |
I would never do that. |
| [12:21.72] |
Look, I know what' s going on here. |
| [12:24.00] |
Mark explained it all to me. He said this is what you guys do. |
| [12:28.46] |
Well, if Mark said that, then Mark' s an idiot. |
| [12:32.50] |
Mark' s a genius. |
| [12:36.33] |
Don' t you see what' s happening? |
| [12:38.17] |
Instead of hitting on her now, he' s becoming her confidante. |
| [12:41.51] |
Now he' s gonna be the guy she goes to, to complain about you. |
| [12:45.01] |
What am I gonna do? |
| [12:46.34] |
Why don' t you send her a musical bug? |
| [12:48.41] |
No, you already did that. |
| [12:53.02] |
You' re gonna have to go there yourself now. |
| [12:55.92] |
Make a few surprise visits. |
| [12:57.66] |
I don' t know, guys. |
| [12:58.82] |
Fine, don' t do anything. Sit and talk to us. |
| [13:01.33] |
Meanwhile, she is talking to him about you. |
| [13:04.16] |
And he' s being Mr. Joe Sensitive. |
| [13:05.93] |
She' s thinking," Maybe he' s the guy for me because he understands me." |
| [13:10.27] |
And before you know it, she' s with him. |
| [13:12.47] |
And you' ll be all," Oh, man!" |
| [13:15.81] |
And he' ll be all," Yes!" |
| [13:19.28] |
And us, we' ll be like," Oh, dude!" |
| [13:24.38] |
And pretty soon you' ll be like: |
| [13:27.12] |
" Hi." |
| [13:29.89] |
And," Well, I can' t go. Rachel and Mark might be there." |
| [13:35.46] |
And we' ll be like," Man, get over it! It' s been four years!" |
| [13:41.37] |
He paints quite a picture, doesn' t he? |
| [13:47.17] |
Here' s the Shelley Segal stuff for December. |
| [13:49.57] |
Wait, I' ve got something for you. |
| [13:52.91] |
It' s okay. Rachel knows. |
| [13:54.81] |
Yeah, but even so |
| [13:57.15] |
I can' t help it. I' m just crazy about you. |
| [14:00.52] |
Oh, that is so sweet! |
| [14:05.36] |
I know I' m Mr. Inappropriate today, but it' s just so tough. |
| [14:08.69] |
I see you walking around, and I want to touch and hold you.... |
| [14:12.43] |
Come on, no one' s around. Just kiss me. |
| [14:15.03] |
All right, that' s it! Get off of her! |
| [14:17.43] |
What is going on? |
| [14:18.77] |
What' s going on? I' ll tell you what' s going on! |
| [14:28.18] |
I have been down in your store for 20 minutes, trying to get a tie. |
| [14:34.85] |
What do I have to do to get some service? |
| [14:39.52] |
Hi, Rach. |
| [14:50.77] |
Joey Tribbiani? |
| [14:57.11] |
I' ve got a problem. |
| [14:58.71] |
I just got a call from my dance captain. |
| [15:01.08] |
He' s having a relationship crisis and can' t leave Long lsland. |
| [15:04.38] |
Does that mean the audition' s off? |
| [15:06.62] |
Seeing as you' ve got the most experience... |
| [15:10.29] |
... I want you to teach these dancers the combination. |
| [15:15.49] |
What? |
| [15:17.09] |
Come on, it' s easy. You know, it' s hand, hand... |
| [15:21.17] |
... head, head |
| [15:23.10] |
... up, pas de bourree, pas de bourree... |
| [15:25.00] |
... big turn here, rond de jambe.... |
| [15:27.94] |
Slide, step, step... |
| [15:30.34] |
... and jazz hands! |
| [15:34.91] |
So that' s," Steppitystep and jazz hands." |
| [15:38.25] |
Have fun. |
| [15:40.45] |
Bye. |
| [15:46.92] |
What are you wrapping? |
| [15:48.76] |
Look what I got Julio. |
| [15:54.20] |
It' s a vase. |
| [15:58.70] |
Not exactly like the one in the poem. |
| [16:02.34] |
What do you mean? |
| [16:03.84] |
Remember how you said you were really dense about poetry? |
| [16:13.32] |
So I' m just an empty vase? |
| [16:15.65] |
What? |
| [16:17.45] |
So, I don' t read as many important books as you do. |
| [16:20.06] |
And I don' t write trick poems that aren' t about what they seem. |
| [16:24.73] |
And I get excited about stupid stuff... |
| [16:27.40] |
... Iike when my People magazine comes... |
| [16:30.30] |
... and the new " Hold Everything" catalog. |
| [16:32.90] |
But that doesn' t mean I' m empty. I care about things. Friends and family. |
| [16:37.37] |
You have no right to judge me! You don' t even know me! |
| [16:41.91] |
The poem is not about you. |
| [16:45.25] |
What? |
| [16:46.38] |
" The Empty Vase" is not about you. " |
| [16:49.39] |
My baby preciosa.... |
| [16:51.66] |
You make me so sad that you would think this. |
| [16:56.86] |
I' m sorry. It' s.... |
| [16:58.53] |
My friend Phoebe said |
| [17:00.93] |
It' s about all women. |
| [17:04.60] |
Well... |
| [17:05.84] |
... all American women. |
| [17:09.91] |
You feel better now? |
| [17:16.91] |
All right, let' s do it. |
| [17:39.10] |
What was that? |
| [17:41.14] |
It' s the best I could get out of them. |
| [17:45.31] |
Well, people! |
| [17:47.04] |
People, people, people! |
| [17:49.65] |
Let' s try it again. And this time, everybody watch Joey. |
| [17:56.05] |
Show ' em how it' s done. |
| [18:03.59] |
Count it off, Mack. |
| [18:13.60] |
|
| [18:17.41] |
Did you have fun at the bachelor party last night? |
| [18:20.34] |
Look what I got! See, she' s dressed, right? |
| [18:23.58] |
And then you click it, and uhoh, she' s naked! |
| [18:28.79] |
And then you click it again and she' s dressed. |
| [18:31.66] |
She' s a business woman walking down the street. |
| [18:34.19] |
She' s window shopping, and oh, she' s naked! |
| [18:48.84] |
I' m gonna spend some alone time with the pen. |
| [19:00.82] |
I' m sorry. I was an idiot. |
| [19:04.02] |
A big idiot. |
| [19:05.62] |
A big idiot. |
| [19:08.29] |
It' s just, you have to realize... |
| [19:13.33] |
Why is it hard? We' ve been together for almost a year now. |
| [19:17.73] |
Well, I was with Carol for, like, eight years. |
| [19:21.17] |
And I lost her. |
| [19:24.04] |
And now, if it' s possible, I think I love you even more. |
| [19:27.91] |
So it' s hard for me to believe I' m not gonna... |
| [19:31.01] |
... well, that someone else isn' t gonna take you away. |
| [19:35.02] |
Let it be me. Let it be me! |
| [19:43.00] |
Honey, that' s very sweet. |
| [19:46.20] |
It just seems to me, though, that if two people love each other... |
| [19:50.23] |
... and trust each other, like we do... |
| [19:52.90] |
... there' s no reason to be jealous. |
| [20:04.62] |
Bye, Chandler. |
| [20:06.78] |
This pen' s getting kind of boring. Can you pick me up some porn? |
| [20:13.72] |
Where you going? |
| [20:14.89] |
I' ve gotta go pick up Ben for a playdate this afternoon. |
| [20:18.36] |
|
| [20:19.70] |
Just this woman I met last night at the party. |
| [20:22.47] |
There was a woman at? |
| [20:26.60] |
The stripper? |
| [20:30.54] |
You have a playdate with a stripper? |
| [20:34.21] |
Man, I gotta get a kid! |
| [20:44.32] |
We started talking after she did her thing... |
| [20:47.22] |
... and she' s got a boy about Ben' s age. |
| [20:49.63] |
So we' re gonna take the kids to a Gymboree class. |
| [20:53.43] |
ls that okay? Sure. Is she married? |
| [21:03.01] |
Are you jealous? |
| [21:06.28] |
I just don' t see why she has to play with you. |
| [21:09.31] |
I mean, doesn' t she have any other strippermom friends of her own? |
| [21:17.79] |
You are totally jealous! |
| [21:20.46] |
I' m not jealous. |
| [21:21.93] |
This is about... |
| [21:25.53] |
... people feeling certain things... |
| [21:28.93] |
... you know, about... |
| [21:31.20] |
... strippers. And, you know.... |
| [21:34.71] |
I love you too. |
| [21:36.44] |
Bye. |
| [21:37.81] |
Wait, wait, wait! |
| [21:39.38] |
What? |
| [21:54.02] |
Well, there' s a kiss he won' t forget for a few hours. |
| [21:58.66] |
Either that or you just turned him on and sent him to a stripper. |
| [22:08.37] |
Is there a Julio here? |
| [22:11.41] |
I am Julio. |
| [22:14.38] |
Mr. Pretentious |
| [22:16.58] |
You think there' s no one finer Your poems are unpublished |
| [22:19.88] |
And you work in a diner |
| [22:21.89] |
You' re no God' s gift to women That' s all in your head |
| [22:26.89] |
You are just a buttmunch |
| [22:28.59] |
No one likes a buttmunch! |