| [02:01.-2] |
And in case you wondered... |
| [06:08.-4] |
All right. |
| [06:34.-2] |
How did you I don' t know. |
| [07:34.-2] |
That' s fine, I' ll just wait. |
| [09:54.-2] |
It' s Monica' s big night. She shouldn' t pay. |
| [10:38.-1] |
All right, what' s going on? |
| [12:50.-4] |
So, the Ebola virus. That' s gotta suck, huh? |
| [14:30.-4] |
I' m just not in a very " Hootie" place right now. |
| [18:15.-2] |
What guys? Oh, yeah. |
| [18:25.-1] |
Oh, my God! Little Stevie Fisher? |
| [20:56.-2] |
And we don' t work hard? |
| [00:07.45] |
Man, I sure miss Julie. |
| [00:09.42] |
Spanish midgets. |
| [00:11.89] |
Spanish midgets wrestling.... |
| [00:15.69] |
Julie! Okay, I see how you got there. |
| [00:24.54] |
You ever figure out what that thing' s for? |
| [00:27.54] |
I' m trying this screening thing. |
| [00:29.64] |
If I always answer the phone, people will think I have no life. |
| [00:33.75] |
My God! Rodrigo never gets pinned! |
| [00:36.08] |
At the sound of the beep, you know what to do. |
| [00:38.78] |
Hello. I' m looking for Bob. |
| [00:40.92] |
This is Jade. |
| [00:42.42] |
I don ' t know if you ' re still at this number, but I was thinking... |
| [00:46.56] |
... about how great it was. I know it' s been three years... |
| [00:50.10] |
... but I was hoping we could hook up again. |
| [00:52.66] |
I barely had the nerve to make this call... |
| [00:55.93] |
... so you know what I did? What? |
| [00:58.34] |
I got a little drunk... |
| [01:00.51] |
... and naked. |
| [01:01.74] |
Bob here! |
| [01:51.62] |
So what have you been up to? |
| [01:54.26] |
Oh, you know, the usual. |
| [01:56.16] |
Teaching aerobics... |
| [01:58.36] |
... partying way too much. |
| [02:02.87] |
... those are my legs on the new James Bond poster. |
| [02:09.84] |
Can you hold on? I have another call. |
| [02:12.44] |
I love her! I know. |
| [02:15.55] |
I' m back. So are we gonna get together? |
| [02:18.68] |
Absolutely. |
| [02:20.35] |
How about tomorrow afternoon? |
| [02:22.15] |
Do you know Central Perk? Say, fiveish? |
| [02:25.06] |
Great. I' ll see you then. |
| [02:31.63] |
Having a phone has finally paid off. |
| [02:36.17] |
You do a good Bob impression... |
| [02:38.64] |
... but when she sees you tomorrow... |
| [02:40.54] |
... she' s gonna realize you' re not Bob. |
| [02:44.81] |
I' m hoping that when Bob doesn' t show up... |
| [02:47.75] |
... she' ll seek comfort in the arms of the stranger at the next table. |
| [02:51.85] |
Oh, my God. You are pure evil. |
| [02:55.92] |
Okay, pure evil... |
| [02:58.36] |
... horny and alone. |
| [03:02.93] |
I' ve done this. |
| [03:10.87] |
Yeah, everybody' s here. |
| [03:13.67] |
Hey, everybody! Say hi to Julie in New Mexico! |
| [03:17.58] |
Hi, Julie. |
| [03:21.08] |
While Ross is on the phone... |
| [03:23.11] |
... everybody owes me 62 bucks for his birthday. |
| [03:26.35] |
Is there any chance that you' re rounding up from... |
| [03:31.52] |
... you know... |
| [03:32.52] |
... from like 20? |
| [03:35.19] |
Hey, we got the gift, the concert and the cake. |
| [03:38.30] |
Do we need a cake? |
| [03:41.70] |
I know it' s a little steep. |
| [03:46.40] |
But it' s Ross. |
| [03:49.37] |
It' s Ross. |
| [03:52.41] |
See you later. I gotta go... |
| [03:54.28] |
... do a thing! |
| [03:57.28] |
Okay, sweetheart, I' ll call you later. |
| [03:59.72] |
You' re not going through with this, are you? |
| [04:02.59] |
You know, I think I might just. |
| [04:07.26] |
What are you guys doing for dinner tonight? |
| [04:11.30] |
Well, I gotta start saving up for Ross' birthday. |
| [04:15.23] |
I guess I' ll just stay home and eat dust bunnies. |
| [04:18.47] |
Can you believe how much this costs? |
| [04:21.31] |
Do you guys ever get the feeling that... |
| [04:24.48] |
... Chandler and those guys... |
| [04:26.44] |
... don' t get that we don' t make that much money? |
| [04:30.82] |
They always say let' s go here, let' s go there. |
| [04:33.82] |
Like we can afford to go here and there. |
| [04:37.19] |
Yes, and we always have to go to, you know, someplace nice. |
| [04:41.59] |
And we can' t say anything about it, because this is a birthday thing... |
| [04:46.66] |
... and it' s " for Ross." |
| [04:48.27] |
For Ross. |
| [04:52.44] |
Oh, my God! |
| [04:55.14] |
I' m at work... |
| [04:57.14] |
... just an ordinary day, chop, chop, saute, saute. |
| [05:01.21] |
Suddenly, Leon, the manager, calls me into his office. |
| [05:04.52] |
They fired the lunch chef, and guess who got the job? |
| [05:07.72] |
If it' s not you, this is a horrible story. |
| [05:11.89] |
Fortunately, it is me. |
| [05:14.19] |
And they made me head of purchasing, thank you! |
| [05:16.89] |
That' s so cool! |
| [05:19.03] |
Anyway, I think we should go out and celebrate. |
| [05:22.13] |
You know, someplace nice. |
| [05:29.67] |
Someplace nice. |
| [05:31.58] |
How much you think I can get for my kidney? |
| [05:41.05] |
You can' t do this. |
| [05:43.52] |
I can' t get a girl like that with conventional methods. |
| [05:47.09] |
It doesn' t matter. |
| [05:48.26] |
She wanted to call Bob. Bob could be who she was meant to be with. |
| [05:53.40] |
You may be destroying their chance for happiness. |
| [05:56.57] |
We don' t know Bob. |
| [05:59.07] |
We know me. We like me. Please let me be happy. |
| [06:03.88] |
Go over there and tell that woman the truth. |
| [06:10.62] |
Go. |
| [06:22.69] |
Listen, I have to.... |
| [06:24.86] |
I have to confess something. |
| [06:27.27] |
Yes? |
| [06:30.60] |
Whoever stood you up is a jerk. |
| [06:38.28] |
I just had this weird sense. But that' s me, I' m weird and sensitive. |
| [06:45.62] |
Tissue? |
| [06:47.89] |
Thanks. |
| [06:50.29] |
No, you keep the pack. |
| [06:52.82] |
I' m all cried out today. |
| [07:10.31] |
Here is to my sister, the newly appointed head lunch chef. |
| [07:13.91] |
Also in charge of purchasing. |
| [07:16.08] |
Head lunch chef, also in charge of purchasing |
| [07:19.25] |
Who has her own little desk when Roland' s not there. |
| [07:23.19] |
Lunch chef, purchasing, own little desk when Roland' s not there... |
| [07:27.33] |
... here' s to my Wait! And I got a beeper! |
| [07:36.13] |
Sorry. |
| [07:39.17] |
Monica! |
| [07:43.11] |
Are we ready to order? |
| [07:44.68] |
We haven' t even looked yet. |
| [07:46.54] |
When you do, let me know. |
| [07:48.38] |
I' ll be over there on the edge of my seat. |
| [07:56.72] |
Look at these prices! |
| [07:58.49] |
Yeah, these are pretty " chaching." |
| [08:02.19] |
I know! What are these, famous chickens? |
| [08:06.46] |
Sorry I' m late. Congratulations, Mon. |
| [08:09.30] |
I' m not sorry I' m late. How incredible was my afternoon with Jade? |
| [08:13.40] |
Pretty incredible, according to the message on my machine. |
| [08:17.71] |
Why is this woman leaving a message for you on my machine? |
| [08:22.15] |
I told her that my number was yours... |
| [08:24.25] |
... because I couldn' t tell her it was mine... |
| [08:26.52] |
... because she thinks my number is Bob' s number. |
| [08:30.72] |
Tell me again. What do I do when Mr. Roper calls? |
| [08:35.89] |
Do I dare ask? |
| [08:37.23] |
I' ll start with the carpaccio, and then the grilled prawns. |
| [08:40.87] |
Great, same for me. |
| [08:42.83] |
And for the gentleman? |
| [08:44.44] |
I' ll have the Thai chicken pizza. |
| [08:46.27] |
But if I get it without the nuts and leeks and stuff... |
| [08:49.61] |
... is it cheaper? |
| [08:51.78] |
You' d think, wouldn' t you? |
| [08:56.61] |
I will have the side salad. |
| [09:00.25] |
And what would that be on the side of? |
| [09:03.45] |
I don' t know. |
| [09:04.56] |
Just put it right here next to my water. |
| [09:10.26] |
And for you? |
| [09:12.43] |
I' m gonna have a cup of the cucumber soup and... |
| [09:19.77] |
... take care. |
| [09:24.08] |
I will have the Cajun catfish. |
| [09:26.41] |
Anything else? |
| [09:27.45] |
Yes, how about a verse of " Killing Me Softly"? |
| [09:32.28] |
You' re gonna sneeze in my fish, aren' t you? |
| [09:40.66] |
Plus tip, divided by six.... |
| [09:44.46] |
Everyone owes 28 bucks. |
| [09:48.13] |
Everyone? |
| [09:50.33] |
Oh! You' re right, I' m sorry. |
| [09:52.94] |
Thank you. |
| [09:58.11] |
So five of us is... |
| [10:00.81] |
... 33. 50 a piece. |
| [10:02.75] |
No. No way. Sorry, not gonna happen. |
| [10:06.48] |
Prom night flashback. |
| [10:10.49] |
Sorry, Monica. I' m happy you got promoted... |
| [10:13.49] |
... but cold cucumber mush for 30something bucks? |
| [10:16.93] |
No! |
| [10:19.33] |
Rachel just had that little salad... |
| [10:22.03] |
... and Joey with his teeny pizza! |
| [10:25.94] |
Okay, Pheebs. |
| [10:28.11] |
How about we' ll each pay for what we had? |
| [10:31.01] |
It' s no big deal. |
| [10:32.54] |
Not for you. |
| [10:40.48] |
I don' t wanna get into this right now. |
| [10:42.82] |
It' ll make everybody uncomfortable. |
| [10:47.53] |
You can tell us. |
| [10:48.73] |
Yeah, hello? It' s us. We' ll be fine. |
| [10:59.34] |
We three... |
| [11:00.54] |
... feel like that... |
| [11:03.01] |
... sometimes you guys don' t get that.... |
| [11:13.85] |
We don' t have as much money as you. |
| [11:21.53] |
I hear you. |
| [11:23.23] |
We can talk about that. |
| [11:26.26] |
Well, then... |
| [11:29.27] |
... Iet' s. |
| [11:34.21] |
I guess I just never think of money as an issue. |
| [11:37.71] |
Because you have it. Good point! |
| [11:42.21] |
So how come you guys haven' t talked about this before? |
| [11:46.18] |
Because it' s always something. Like with Monica' s new job... |
| [11:50.12] |
... or the whole Ross' birthday hoopla. |
| [11:54.69] |
I don' t want my birthday to be the source of any kind of negative.... |
| [11:59.46] |
There' s gonna be a hoopla? |
| [12:03.90] |
Basically there' s the thing, and then the stuff after the thing |
| [12:09.21] |
If it makes anybody feel better, forget the thing... |
| [12:12.31] |
... and we' ll just do the gift. |
| [12:14.61] |
Gift? The thing' s not the gift? |
| [12:18.22] |
No, we were gonna go see Hootie and the Blowfish. |
| [12:21.22] |
Hootie and the " |
| [12:22.89] |
I can catch them on the radio. |
| [12:26.16] |
No. Now I feel bad. You wanna go to the concert. |
| [12:29.59] |
No, look. It' s my birthday... |
| [12:32.16] |
... and the important thing is that we' re all together. |
| [12:35.57] |
All of us. Together. |
| [12:36.77] |
Not at the concert. |
| [12:41.51] |
Thank you. |
| [12:58.00] |
Gee, Monica. What' s in the bag? |
| [13:00.09] |
I don' t know, Chandler. Let' s take a look. |
| [13:02.83] |
Oh, it' s like a skit. |
| [13:06.36] |
Why, it' s dinner for six. Five steaks... |
| [13:09.37] |
... and an eggplant for Phoebe. |
| [13:13.84] |
We switched suppliers at work, and they gave me the steaks as a thankyou. |
| [13:17.94] |
But wait, there' s more. Chandler, what is in that envelope? |
| [13:24.12] |
By the way, this didn' t seem so dorky out in the hall. |
| [13:28.45] |
Why, it' s six tickets to Hootie and the Blowfish! |
| [13:34.46] |
The Blowfish! |
| [13:37.90] |
It' s on us. So don' t worry. This is... |
| [13:40.73] |
... our treat. |
| [13:43.37] |
Thank you. |
| [13:47.40] |
Could you be less enthused? |
| [13:49.37] |
Look, it' s a nice gesture. It is. |
| [13:52.04] |
But it just feels like.... |
| [13:54.38] |
Like? |
| [13:56.08] |
Charity. |
| [13:57.15] |
Charity? |
| [13:58.52] |
We' re just trying to do a nice thing here. |
| [14:01.05] |
But you have to understand, your " nice thing" makes us feel about this big. |
| [14:05.39] |
Actually, it makes us feel that big. |
| [14:11.40] |
I don' t understand. We can' t win with you guys. |
| [14:14.40] |
If you guys feel this big, maybe that' s not our fault. |
| [14:17.70] |
Maybe that' s just how you feel. |
| [14:22.44] |
Now you' re telling us how we feel. |
| [14:25.41] |
We never should have talked about this. |
| [14:27.61] |
I' m gonna pass on the concert. |
| [14:35.92] |
Me neither. Me too. |
| [14:38.09] |
Guys, we bought the tickets. |
| [14:40.42] |
Then you' ll have extra seats for all your tiaras and stuff. |
| [14:45.23] |
Why did you look at me when you said that? |
| [14:51.87] |
So I guess now we can' t go. |
| [14:53.87] |
Do what you want. Do we always have to do everything together? |
| [14:59.24] |
You know what? You' re right. |
| [15:01.45] |
Fine. |
| [15:06.42] |
All right. |
| [15:08.62] |
We' re gonna go. |
| [15:15.46] |
It' s not for another six hours. We' re gonna go then. |
| [15:30.41] |
Are you ready? |
| [15:31.81] |
Just let me grab my jacket and tell you I had sex today. |
| [15:37.35] |
What? You had sex today? |
| [15:40.02] |
It sounds even cooler when somebody else says it! |
| [15:44.42] |
I was awesome. She was biting her lip to stop from screaming. |
| [15:50.13] |
I know it' s been a while, but I took that as a good sign. |
| [15:58.84] |
Still doing the screening? |
| [16:00.84] |
I had sex today. |
| [16:03.44] |
I never have to answer that phone again. |
| [16:06.64] |
At the sound of the beep, you know what to do. |
| [16:09.48] |
Hey, Bob. It' s Jade. |
| [16:11.05] |
I wanted to tell you I was really hurt when you didn ' t show up yesterday. |
| [16:15.15] |
And just so you know, I ended up meeting a guy. |
| [16:20.46] |
Bob here. |
| [16:23.56] |
So you met someone, huh? |
| [16:25.90] |
Yes, I did. |
| [16:27.63] |
In fact, I had sex with him two hours ago. |
| [16:34.81] |
So how was he? |
| [16:46.92] |
Oh, Bob, he was nothing compared to you. |
| [16:53.49] |
I bit my lip to keep from screaming your name. |
| [16:59.16] |
Well, that makes me feel so good. |
| [17:02.57] |
It was just so awkward and bumpy. |
| [17:07.10] |
Maybe he had some kind of new style that you' re not familiar with. |
| [17:12.24] |
You have to get used to it. |
| [17:13.91] |
There wasn ' t much time to get used to it... |
| [17:16.45] |
... if you know what I mean. |
| [17:28.46] |
You know what? I' m not gonna be able to enjoy this. |
| [17:31.60] |
I know. It' s my birthday. We all should be here. |
| [17:35.60] |
So let' s go. |
| [17:43.64] |
Well, maybe we should stay for one song. |
| [17:46.24] |
It would be rude to them for us to leave now. |
| [17:49.31] |
The guys are probably having a great time. |
| [17:55.62] |
Come on, you guys. One more time. |
| [17:59.72] |
One. |
| [18:11.57] |
Amazing! Excellent! |
| [18:13.07] |
I can' t believe the guys missed it! |
| [18:18.78] |
Excuse me. Aren' t you Monica Geller? |
| [18:21.68] |
Do I know you? You were my babysitter! |
| [18:27.45] |
How have you been? |
| [18:29.19] |
Good. I' m a lawyer now. |
| [18:31.46] |
You can' t be a lawyer. You' re 8. |
| [18:34.29] |
It was nice to see you. I gotta run backstage. |
| [18:36.93] |
Wait, backstage? |
| [18:38.30] |
My firm represents the band. |
| [18:43.77] |
You guys wanna meet the group? |
| [18:46.50] |
Come on. |
| [18:47.54] |
Are you one of the ones that fooled around with my Dad? |
| [18:56.38] |
Hey, you guys! |
| [18:57.45] |
Happy birthday! |
| [18:58.55] |
Oh, thank you. |
| [19:03.35] |
How was your night last night? |
| [19:05.69] |
Oh, well, it pretty much sucked. How was yours? |
| [19:09.46] |
Ours pretty much sucked too. |
| [19:11.36] |
But I ran into Stevie Fisher. Remember him? |
| [19:14.00] |
Oh, yeah! I used to babysit him. |
| [19:16.33] |
Hey, how' s his dad? |
| [19:20.07] |
Good. |
| [19:21.67] |
Aside from that, the evening was pretty much a bust. |
| [19:25.14] |
Yeah, we really missed you guys. |
| [19:28.25] |
Yeah, we were just saying, this whole thing is so stupid. |
| [19:32.22] |
We just have to really, really not let stuff like money, get like |
| [19:37.75] |
Is that a hickey? |
| [19:41.06] |
Oh, no, I just.... |
| [19:43.00] |
I fell down. |
| [19:46.93] |
On someone' s lips? |
| [19:50.10] |
Where' d you get the hickey? |
| [19:52.00] |
You know, a party or |
| [19:53.50] |
What party? |
| [19:54.51] |
It wasn' t a party so much as a... |
| [19:57.34] |
... a gathering of people. |
| [20:00.61] |
With food and music and... |
| [20:03.05] |
... and the band. |
| [20:06.08] |
You partied with Hootie and the Blowfish? |
| [20:08.45] |
Yes. Apparently, Stevie and Hootie are like this. |
| [20:12.76] |
Who gave you that hickey? |
| [20:15.13] |
That would be the work of a Blowfish. |
| [20:20.63] |
I can' t believe it! I can' t believe this! |
| [20:23.63] |
We' re just sitting at home, trying to guess Joey' s fingers... |
| [20:30.77] |
... and you' re partying and having fun and all: |
| [20:33.61] |
" Hey, Blowfish, suck on my neck!" " |
| [20:39.42] |
Don' t blame us. You could' ve been there. |
| [20:42.22] |
What? As part of your " poor friends outreach program"? |
| [20:47.06] |
Oh, great. It' s work. |
| [20:48.56] |
I don' t know what to say. I' m sorry we make more than you. |
| [20:52.43] |
But we' re not gonna feel guilty. We work really hard. |
| [20:57.63] |
It' s Monica. I got a page. |
| [20:59.47] |
It' s just that sometimes we like to do stuff that costs a little more. |
| [21:03.67] |
And you feel like we hold you back. |
| [21:11.75] |
Leon, wait. |
| [21:13.02] |
Guys! |
| [21:14.79] |
I don' t understand. |
| [21:16.12] |
The steaks were a gift from the meat vendor. |
| [21:18.52] |
That was not a kickback. |
| [21:20.76] |
I' ll just replace them, and we can forget the whole thing. |
| [21:27.10] |
What corporate policy? |
| [21:42.61] |
I just got fired. |
| [21:50.19] |
Here' s your check. That' ll be 4. 1 2. |
| [21:52.52] |
Let me get that. |
| [21:57.66] |
You got 5 bucks? |
| [22:08.84] |
Here comes the beep. You know what to do. |
| [22:12.24] |
Hi, it' s me. |
| [22:17.45] |
Listen, Bob. I' m probably way out of line here. |
| [22:20.75] |
It' s been three years, and you ' re probably seeing someone else now... |
| [22:24.79] |
... but if we could have one night together, for old time ' s sake.... |
| [22:28.86] |
One hot, steamy, wild night.... |