I'm goin' to move down to Florida
And I'm gonna bowl me a perfect game
I'm gonna cut off my leg down in Florida
An I'm gonna dance one-legged off in the rain
Well, they say this [unverified] heals blind man
And they say that it'll be [unverified] a Soviet Jew
I tell that when I go down to Florida
There ain't no kind of sexual healing
That I would not should not or could not do said it right here
Well, I'm movin' down to Florida
And you know I'm gonna have to potty train the chairman Mao
And I'm gonna make the governor right my, doo doo, a letter child
And then I'm gonna grind me a white castle flat out of India's sacred cow
Well, I'm goin' down to Florida, child
And I'm gonna build me the atomic bomb
I'm gonna hold time hostage down in Florida, child
And nobody, ain't nobody gonna tell me what to do, step child
By this time I guess you've figured out about Florida
Turned the muddy water into Vaseline stand
They be making tadpoles the size of mercurys in Florida
That be telling Julio Inglesias what to sing
Now whoever said that Sidney [unverified] was a blind man
Knew the same of Elvis Presley too
'Cuz all the sausages that dance like Ray Boulder
[Unverified] on the hood of a car in a traffic jam
Know just exactly what to do right here
Well, I be goin' to Florida
Pole cats [unverified] the Seminole sun
You know that I'm in Florida
Just like Vince I want it all
Well, I'm goin' down to Florida, I got hurt
So I took all the children down to Florida
Then I stored the [unverified]
Well, I'm never goin' back to Florida
That's why I'm moving today
When I settled down in Florida
I'm gonna explode the whole damn Tampa bay
Get [unverified] in Florida [unverified]