[ti:three point one four - album version (explicit)]
[ar:bloodhound gang]
[al:hooray for boobies]
[offset:-100]
[00:33.04]My last girlfriend didn't like me thought she might be
[00:35.75]Most likely a dyke she just didn't excite me
[00:38.72]Lefty? Yeah but that was alright
[00:40.39]She was hotter than the sun but she just wasn't that bright
[00:43.21]My mistake she was more flaky than a leper colony
[00:45.77]I think a wooden clothespin would have been much better company
[00:48.41]Ass like a donkey acting funky gave her "L" now she's flunky
[00:51.22]So my love for her died quicker than a batch of Sea Monkeys
[00:53.92]Early bird gets the worm spread your legs or spread the word
[00:56.38]So what if I'm not the smartest peanut in the turd
[00:59.10]I'm white which goes with everything but I can come in any color
[01:01.75]And I'm looking for the kind of girl that reminds me of my mother
[01:04.42]But it's hard to find a girl with a viper tattooed on her tushy
[01:07.10]And how many girls do you know that can play the harmonica with their pussies?
[01:09.84]Like em' easy and hot and sweet like a Rice Krispie Treat gee
[01:12.47][02:27.25]You know what I really want in a girl? Me
[01:16.00][02:30.66]I need to find a new vagina
[01:21.21][02:35.82]Any kind of new vagina
[01:26.68][02:41.22]It's hard to rhyme a word like vagina
[01:31.70][02:46.37]Calvin Klein? Kind of North Carolina
[01:47.61]Women are like dog doo hear me through don't interrupt
[01:49.83]It's just the older that they are the easier they are to pick up
[01:52.48]I'd fill the generation gap clean the cobwebs from her rafters
[01:55.29]Old hens would rather put than be put out to the pasture
[01:57.98]No age just ain't a gauge I like my girls like my cheese
[02:00.43]Preferably for me fat-free American singles only
[02:03.17]I want my next chick anorexic the winner in the thinner
[02:06.01]Won't have to take her skinny ass out to a fancy dinner
[02:08.53]Like Sizzler she got a beef we'll chew the fat
[02:11.27]If I forget to put the seat up I can put up with her crap
[02:13.78]Let her lash out and crack the whip but not in bed I don't play rough
[02:16.66]No I can't be tied down with a girl that wants me tied up
[02:19.06]Just independent like NOFX smart like Janeane Garafolo
[02:21.76]She'd use big words to make fun of me so that I would never know
[02:24.41]Bestow upon me all her knowledge of the Dewey Decimal System gee
[03:13.45]Vagina vagina vagina vagina
[03:24.00]Vagina vagina vagina vagina...