Noel Coward was a charmer
As a writer he was brahma
Velvet jackets and pyjamas
The gay divorce and other dramas
There ain't half been some clever bastards
Lucky bleeders lucky bleeders
There ain't half been some clever bas tards
Van Gough did some eyeball pleasers
He must have been a pencil squeezer
He didn't do the Mona Lisa
That was an Italian geezer
There ain't half been some clever bastards
Lucky bleeders lucky bleeders
There ain't half been some clever bas tards
Einstein can't be classed as witless
He claimed atoms were the littlest
When you did a bit of splitting em ness
Frightened everybody s**tless
There ain't half been some clever bastards
Probably got help from their mum
Who had help from her mum
There ain't half been some clever bastards
Now that we've had some
Let's hope that there's lots more to come
There ain't half been some clever bastards
Lucky bleeders lucky bleeders
There ain't half been some clever bas tards
Okey dokey
Oh
Segovia
Da laa la laa da daa da lee
De dump di dump de dump dump diddle li lee
There ain't half been some clever bastards
Lucky bleeders lucky bleeders
There ain't half been some clever bastards
Lucky bleeders lucky bleeders
There ain't half been some clever bastards
Lucky bleeders lucky bleeders
There ain't half been some clever