[00:00.76]Sacha Baron Cohen - Master Of The House
[00:05.94]My band of soaks
[00:07.81]
[00:09.43]My den of dissolutes
[00:11.37]
[00:13.30]My dirty jokes my always **** as newts.
[00:20.44]
[00:22.21]My sons of whores
[00:25.77]
[00:28.73]Spent their lives in my inn
[00:32.49]
[00:36.17]Homing pigeons homing in
[00:39.29]
[00:40.35]Then fly through my doors
[00:43.42]
[00:47.58]And I * down on all faults
[00:49.95]
[00:53.21]Welcome m'sieur
[00:54.29]
[00:54.85]Sit yourself down
[00:56.04]
[00:56.55]And meet the best
[00:58.18]Innkeeper in town
[00:59.69]
[01:01.88]As for the rest
[01:03.27]All of 'em crooks
[01:05.01]Rooking their guests
[01:06.76]And cooking the books
[01:07.88]
[01:10.69]Seldom do you see
[01:12.87]
[01:14.43]Honest men like me
[01:16.62]
[01:17.38]A gent of good intent
[01:20.43]Who's content to be
[01:22.99]
[01:24.43]Master of the house
[01:25.74]Doling out the charm
[01:26.98]Ready with a handshake
[01:28.23]And an open palm
[01:29.87]Tells a saucy tale
[01:31.37]Makes a little stir
[01:32.76]Customers appreciate a bon-viveur
[01:34.94]
[01:35.77]Glad to do a friend a favor
[01:38.59]Doesn't cost me to be nice
[01:40.90]
[01:41.52]But nothing gets you nothing
[01:43.15]Everything has got a little price!
[01:46.08]
[01:47.56]Master of the house
[01:48.87]Keeper of the zoo
[01:50.31]Ready to relieve 'em
[01:51.67]Of a sou or two
[01:53.16]Watering the wine
[01:54.47]Making up the weight
[01:55.97]Pickin' up their knick-knacks
[01:57.41]When they can't see straight
[01:59.03]Everybody loves a landlord
[02:01.09]
[02:01.73]Everybody's buxom friend
[02:03.91]
[02:04.54]I do whatever pleases
[02:05.97]Jesus! won't i bleed 'em in the end!
[02:07.97]
[02:09.09]Master of the house
[02:10.15]Quick to catch yer eye
[02:11.59]Never wants a passerby
[02:12.40]To pass him by
[02:14.52]Servant to the poor
[02:15.89]Butler to the great
[02:17.27]Comforter philosopher
[02:18.39]And lifelong mate!
[02:19.76]
[02:20.27]Everybody's boon companion
[02:22.13]
[02:22.95]Everybody's chaperone
[02:24.57]
[02:25.82]But lock up your valises
[02:27.44]Jesus! won't i skin you to the bone!
[02:29.26]
[02:30.63]Food beyond compare
[02:31.82]Food beyond belief
[02:33.25]Mix it in a mincer
[02:34.68]And pretend it's beef
[02:36.21]Kidney of a horse
[02:37.72]Liver of a cat
[02:39.09]Filling up the sausages
[02:40.42]With this and that
[02:41.60]Residents are more than welcome
[02:44.05]
[02:44.74]Bridal suite is occupied
[02:46.75]
[02:47.69]Reasonable charges
[02:49.14]Plus some little extras on the side!
[02:51.84]
[02:53.65]Charge 'em for the lice
[02:54.97]Extra for the mice
[02:56.35]Two percent for looking in the mirror twice
[02:59.17]Here a little slice
[03:00.67]There a little cut
[03:01.42]Three percent for sleeping with the window shut
[03:05.16]When it comes to fixing prices
[03:06.97]
[03:07.91]There are a lot of tricks he knows
[03:10.03]
[03:10.84]How it all increases
[03:12.52]All those bits and pieces
[03:13.77]Jesus! it's amazing how it grows!
[03:15.98]
[03:26.59]I used to dream
[03:27.96]That i would meet a prince
[03:29.77]
[03:31.14]But god almighty
[03:32.38]
[03:34.13]Have you seen what's happened since?
[03:36.72]
[03:38.86]Master of the house?
[03:40.84]
[03:41.52]Isn't worth me spit!
[03:43.33]
[03:43.90]'comforter philosopher'
[03:46.33]- and lifelong ****!
[03:48.14]
[03:49.20]Cunning little brain
[03:50.76]
[03:51.45]Regular voltaire
[03:53.44]
[03:54.13]Thinks he's quite a lover
[03:56.56]But there's not much there
[03:58.88]
[03:59.56]What a cruel trick of nature
[04:01.93]
[04:03.30]Landed me with such a louse
[04:05.99]
[04:06.86]God knows how i've lasted
[04:07.63]Living with this **** in the house!
[04:10.20]
[04:11.70]Master of the house!
[04:12.76]Master and a half!
[04:14.07]Comforter philosopher
[04:15.75]Ah don't make me laugh!
[04:17.00]Servant to the poor
[04:18.74]Butler to the great
[04:19.62]Hypocrite and toady
[04:20.92]And inebriate!
[04:22.30]
[04:23.11]Everybody bless the landlord!
[04:24.98]
[04:25.73]Everybody bless his spouse!
[04:28.54]Everybody raise a glass
[04:30.80]
[04:31.43]Raise it up the master's ****
[04:33.81]
[04:34.81]Everybody raise a glass to the master of the house!