[00:00.000] 作曲 : Cameron Smith/Karlin Weins
[00:00.300]
[00:03.000]Is it enough that you succeed or does someone else need to fail?
[00:07.000]There's a lot that my soul still needs and my heart has left a bleeding trail
[00:13.000]To balance out my order/chaos dynamic
[00:15.000]I derive joy from anything that isn't panic
[00:19.000]Because life doesn't get easier, but our strength moves like meteors
[00:24.000]And lately, I'm not afraid of monsters as much as I'm afraid of becoming one
[00:29.000]My mind has been hiding the imposters and the thought of revenge sometimes sounds like fun
[00:34.000]So I begin to run so I don't get lost in what was
[00:38.000]Removing my pride so I don't feel so undone
[00:42.000]It's crazy what a soul can become
[00:44.000]'Cause you have to make your opponent seem reprehensible so you don't have to take them seriously
[00:50.000]But freedom from the chains of depression are obtainable when I can talk to myself fearlessly
[00:55.000]So, I turn to songs and music and bands that feel honest
[00:59.000]Music where I'm finally not paying for the name, but I'm actually paying for the product
[01:06.000]I promise that I'm echoing the message that I was taught when I was facing trauma
[01:10.000]I wrote about the real stuff in my life and now I feel like I've lost it
[01:15.000]That sense of comfort of knowing no one really knows me
[01:19.000]Because I'm afraid of my mistakes and I don't like feeling lonely
[01:22.000]So I ask, you don't need to stay, but before you leave, could you at least hold me?
[01:50.000]I hate feeling this depression
[01:54.000]I hate making first impressions
[01:57.000]I hate digging my head in the sand
[02:00.000]And I hate not having your attention
[02:02.000]I hate that there's hate in my heart
[02:05.000]And I promise that it'll someday leave me
[02:05.000]But the moments I spend creating art are the only ones that I feel can still complete me
[02:10.998]And I'll say "I love you" to my dad more often, now that my mom is living in heaven
[02:15.998]I'll stop complaining about the past and I'll stop hoping things were just more even
[02:20.998]And I won't complain about the rules, even when I feel that the game is not fair
[02:26.998]Because life can end in one quick second and it's time that I begin to care
[02:30.998]I want to pray more often and I want to talk less
[02:34.998]I want to let love begin to blossom and stop living in mess
[02:38.998]I want to focus on my physical health and stop indulging when I'm depressed
[02:42.998]I want to make life less about fearing hell and more about the love we possess
[02:46.998]And I want to feel beautiful even in the moments that I regret
[02:50.998]I just want to feel beautiful