One, two, three, four
I am not so upset about my horrible self
So why don't you go upset yourself
Hey here's the mirror see your stupid face
What a disgrace man and you know it's true
Cretin family, cretin family,
Cretin family, everyone's against me
Cretin family, cretin family, cretin family,
Oi, oi, oi, oi
Don't stare at me it's freakin' me out
Look what's happenin' now it's all your fault
You can't do nothin' absolutely nothin' okay
Why don't you get a hula hoop? 
And do the cretin hop and
Cretin family, cretin family,
Cretin family, everyone's against me
Cretin family, cretin family, cretin family,
Oi, oi, oi, oi
I'm never wrong, tell me what to do?
Here's a little curse it's from me to you
It's nothin' gonna happen nothin' ever will
You'll be miserable every day your luck will always be bad
Cretin family, cretin family,
Cretin family, everyone's against me
Cretin family, cretin family, cretin family,
Oi, oi, oi, oi
Everyone's against me, oi, oi, oi, oi
Everyone's against me, oi, oi, oi, oi
Everyone's against me, oi, oi, oi, oi
Everyone's against me, oi, oi, oi, oi