[00:00.00] 作词 : Frank Lopes Jr.
[00:00.96] 作曲 : Frank Lopes Jr.
[00:01.93]Okay picture this:
[00:02.82]There's this cold floating rock, right
[00:04.08]And at the bottom of this rock there's this ocean
[00:05.42]And at the bottom of the ocean there's these
[00:06.63]Little teeny amoeba, right
[00:07.99]And after millions of years these amoeba
[00:09.54]They start turning into fish and swimming around
[00:11.30]I don't know how it works, but it does
[00:12.60]So these amoebas, right, these amoeba fish
[00:14.82]Are swimming around until one day
[00:16.21]One of these fish is like "you know what
[00:17.18]I ****ing hate the ocean, it sucks, its cold, its wet
[00:20.85]I'm done! I'm done"
[00:22.33]So he grabs these ****ing little things that are called hands and feet
[00:25.35]And he connects them to his body
[00:26.83]And he crawls out of this ocean, right
[00:29.54]And when he gets onto the bay, guess what he sees?
[00:31.04]He looks around and he sees
[00:31.88]A female fish, and she's beautiful., oh my god, stunning
[00:35.29]So they talk, they talk for a few days
[00:37.44]And then they start, you know after a few days they start
[00:39.25]Mashing parts, 'cause that's what happens, right? (Mashing parts!)
[00:41.32]So they mash parts and all these babies get born
[00:43.50]And after millions of years these
[00:44.56]Babies shed their scales, shed their fins
[00:46.39]Until they start standing upright, and one day
[00:48.49]They **** and their brains get so big
[00:50.68]That they understand these really scary concepts
[00:52.43]And one of these concepts is that they're going to... die!
[00:55.14]And what's scarier than knowing you're going to die?
[00:57.23]Nothing, to me
[00:59.49]So one day this guy's like:
[01:01.64]"You know what, I'm gonna create something
[01:03.29]That makes me not afraid of dying", Right?
[01:05.00]So he comes up with it, and its actually called...
[01:06.88]This thing you may know as, its called... Religion!
[01:10.53]And this religion causes a bunch of... Conflict!
[01:13.99]Conflict, bang bang bang, that's literally what it sounds like
[01:17.28]So with all this (Conflict!) they understand they need some order
[01:20.84]So they create this thing called... Government!
[01:22.38]To keep each other in line, but guess what?
[01:24.69]It actually doesn't happen like that
[01:25.97]Guess what it creates? It creates a bunch more... Conflict!
[01:28.96]Oh my god, and out of all this conflict arises a president
[01:32.76]And this president is orange, he's got orange hair
[01:35.48]It's parted to the side, it looks really dumb
[01:37.34]He's chubby, and he's got little sausage fingers
[01:40.38]They look like Little Smokeys
[01:41.64]I personally love Little Smokeys
[01:43.83]Either way, he starts arguing with this leader
[01:45.63]On the other side of the world
[01:47.02]He's got a bowl cut, he's similarly pudgy
[01:48.65]He's got sausage fingers too
[01:49.83]I don't know what it is with guys with sausage fingers
[01:51.38]But it messes their minds up, right?
[01:52.97]So they start bickering like little children
[01:54.66]And one day the guy with orange hair is just like
[01:56.41]"You know what I'm gonna ****ing do it, I've got a
[01:57.99]Small d**k I ain't got nothing to lose"
[01:59.39]So he gets his thing, and he presses the button and it just goes
[02:01.62]Ba-ba-ba-bang bang and it blows him up
[02:03.99]And everybody dies
[02:06.09]Everybody dies
[02:07.34]Everybody dies
[02:08.86]What's the only thing that survives a nuclear war?
[02:11.44]Everyone say it on 5...
[02:13.63]1, 2, 3, 4... 5 Cockroaches!
[02:17.85]So the cockroaches are really small
[02:19.14]But after millions of years they start getting bigger
[02:21.01]Then one day they start losing their ****ing shale... shells
[02:23.48]And losing their ****ing antennas
[02:25.60]And then their ****ing brains get so big
[02:27.88]They understand these really scary concepts
[02:29.90]And the concepts that they are going to... Die!
[02:32.36]But guess what, they don't wanna die
[02:33.65]So they create this new thing called... Religion!
[02:35.31]But it creates a newer thing called... Conflict!
[02:37.01]So then they protect each other, so they create... Government!
[02:39.77]But then it creates even more... Conflict!
[02:41.28]Oh my god, and out of the conflict arises this ****ing president
[02:45.10]He's a cockroach, he's a little small boy
[02:47.88]And he gets really ****ing insecure
[02:51.54]About his place in the world, ha ha ha, classic
[02:54.23]So he finds some guy to project onto
[02:56.13]And they start bickering, and he bickers and bickers
[02:58.05]The other guy's like, "**** you"
[02:59.06]The other guy's like, "**** you mother****er"
[03:01.33]But he has to go to his top cockroach scientist
[03:03.22]Because guess what, nukes don't ****ing work on cockroaches
[03:06.44]It bounces off them like... a soft ocean breeze
[03:09.29]So the president ****ing, he's like
[03:11.21]"Ok I'm gonna do it"
[03:12.22]So he devises a new missile
[03:13.19]He talks to his top cockroach scientist, imagine that
[03:15.52]A big humanlike cockroach in a ****ing labsuit with glasses on, heh
[03:18.47]So he ****ing tells him, he's like
[03:20.73]"We need a missile that kills cockroaches"
[03:22.03]So the scientist is like
[03:23.38]"Ok I got it, it's gonna be a missile
[03:24.95]And on the end of the missile instead of a nuke
[03:26.82]It's one giant, president it's a giant, it's a giant..."
[03:31.61]SHOE!
[03:32.84]AND IT BLOWS HIM UP
[03:36.91]It's a giant... shoe, heh
[03:41.70]Classic, classic, classic, classic, classic, I mean
[03:43.96]I mean, we just tryna chill
[03:46.30]We didn't come here to show off, or like floss our shit
[03:51.64]Or anything like that
[03:53.03]We just came to chill and have fun
[03:55.39]And I guess that's what life's all about
[03:59.01]Ha ha, let go