1917

	Going down Morgan with Janko, Jerko, and Jerry
	We downed our Pils, and over at the South Shore, they sipped their sherry
	I opened my Kaiserized speller to learn what they know
	Nurse killers, annexers-executioners, waouh!
	Hey Slavonians, be ye mindful
	That our ‘tis tongue dies never
	The happy Hun Felsch sure likes his blond beer
	And I like his doubles so much I might even cheer
	Last year he had enough and got fixed on the cardinal
	Who'd pardon all
	The riff-raff and all their sinister ways and halfs and he laughs
	Over on fifty-sixth, and he's got the arsenic on his left White Sock
	And he sees the chicken stock in a big black pot
	And he pours in the lot, but what ruined or saved the day
	Was that the soup then turned gray, and a hundred higher-ups came
	Back safe from the hospital to keep getting wafers from Mundelein
	But now the Gigantics are getting the tar taken out of their pine
	By my hero Red Faber and I'm ready to get rapprochement with my neighbor
	As part of the healthy back and forth
	But not if he's from up north.
	So I ask Dad, Why can't we ever win, ever win, once
	Go ask Dad, why you can't ever win, ever win, once

	Going down Morgan with Janko, Jerko, and Jerry
	We downed our Pils, and over at the South Shore, they sipped their sherry
	I opened my Kaiserized speller to learn what they know
	Nurse killers, annexersexecutioners, waouh!
	Hey Slavonians, be ye mindful
	That our ' tis tongue dies never
	The happy Hun Felsch sure likes his blond beer
	And I like his doubles so much I might even cheer
	Last year he had enough and got fixed on the cardinal
	Who' d pardon all
	The riffraff and all their sinister ways and halfs and he laughs
	Over on fiftysixth, and he' s got the arsenic on his left White Sock
	And he sees the chicken stock in a big black pot
	And he pours in the lot, but what ruined or saved the day
	Was that the soup then turned gray, and a hundred higherups came
	Back safe from the hospital to keep getting wafers from Mundelein
	But now the Gigantics are getting the tar taken out of their pine
	By my hero Red Faber and I' m ready to get rapprochement with my neighbor
	As part of the healthy back and forth
	But not if he' s from up north.
	So I ask Dad, Why can' t we ever win, ever win, once
	Go ask Dad, why you can' t ever win, ever win, once