I'm in a band with an Italian drummer and all the girls just fall in his lap I'm in a band with an Italian drummer But for a foreigner he's quite a nice chap He just cooks pasta, always faster He smokes with his father, makes good carbonara His cock's too long to fit in this song He shaves his legs and always thinks about sex His hands have blisters, don't trust him with your sisters He talks baloni and eats rigatoni His name's on his sticks, he's got smelly armpits And when he plays his drums it sounds like this I'm in a band with an Italian drummer and all the girls just fall in his lap I'm in a band with an Italian drummer But for a foreigner he's quite a nice chap He's really Italian, hung like a stallion He never takes a rest from chasing breasts and legs He hates Peter Criss but he still likes Kiss And when he plays his drums it sounds like this I'm in a band with an Italian drummer and all the girls just fall in his lap I'm in a band with an Italian drummer But for a foreigner he's quite a nice chap "The characters described in this song are fictitious and any similarity to real people living or dead is entirely coincidental and unintentional" I'm in a band with an Italian drummer and all the girls just fall in his lap I'm in a band with an Italian drummer But for a foreigner he's quite a nice chap He's really Italian, he's hung like a stallion His cock's too long to fit in this song He shaves his legs, always thinks about sex His hands have blisters, don't trust him with your sisters He talks baloni and eats rigatoni His name's on his sticks, he's got smelly armpits when he plays his drums... ...do you know someone like this? I'm in a band with an Italian drummer I'm in a band with a foreign chap (Repeat in infinity) "You know son, it's like this you see. We met him down the pub one day and eerm... he looked a bit of a geezer at the time. Ha! It was only when we gave him a ****ing saxophone that he discovered he was a ****ing drummer didn't he! ****ing cunt! So we got rid of his saxophone and eerm... put these drums there instead. And eerm... he was a star really. And there's nothing we can do about it really." I'm in a band, in a band, in a band... "Hey, are you ****ing talking to me, aye? Minchia! Minchia! Minchia! E' come se metti del peperoncino nel culo di una porta che scoreggia nuvole di nero. E poi c'era una vacca... Io non ho capito che dice questo ragazzo inglese... Non mi ricordo. Ehi Vito, ma che cazzo dice, eh ?! E te l'ho detto, io non capisco una minchia questo ragazzo straniero. ...****ing talking to you, aye!!! Ah, think so! Andate a 'fanculo !!!"