作曲 : Heinecke, Nawrocki
Arr, arr, arr, arr
We are the pirates who don't do anything 
We just stay at home and lay around
And if you ask us to do anything
Well just tell you we don't do anything
But I've never been to Cleveland
And I've never been to Denver
And I've never buried treasure in St. Louie or St. Paul
And I've never been to Moscow
And I've never been to Tampa
And I've never been to Boston in the fall
We are the pirates who don't do anything 
We just stay at home and lay around
And if you ask us to do anything
Well just tell you we don't do anything
And I've never hoist the main sail
And I've never swabbed the poop deck
And I've never veer to starboard
Cause I never sail at all
And I've never walked the gangplank
And I've never owned a parrot
And I've never been to Boston in the fall
Cause were the pirates who don't do anything 
We just stay at home and lay around
And if you ask us to do anything
Well just tell you we don't do anything
well i've never plucked a rooster
And I'm not too good at ping ball
And I've never thrown my mashed potatoes
Up against the wall
And I've never kissed a chipmunk
And I've never gotten head lice 
And I've never been to Boston in the fall
And I've never licked a spark plug
And I've never sniffed a stinkbug
And I've never painted daises 
On a big red rubber ball
And I've never bathed in yogurt
And I don't look good in leggings
And I've never been to Boston in the fall!