| Song | Delicate Checkouts |
| Artist | JR Ewing |
| Album | Perfect Drama |
| Am a valuable asset | |
| To the white trash that hired me in the first place | |
| I am an income that pays for | |
| Their comfy overseas flights | |
| With cheap whine and plastic meat | |
| We are the expendable youth | |
| That falls for the trick and treat |